I am twenty three, intelligent, beautiful, and funny woman. I am a college graduate, and I am currently finishing up an additional degree. Everyone tells me I am so beautiful, and the guys I date agree, but I feel they dont respect me how I should be respected. I have been told I am the girl every guy wants, but doesnt deserve, yet I have been subject to heartbreak several times. Why dont good guys want to be with me? Why am I attracted to, and vice versa, to jerks who just want fun and no commitments? Is it just not my time? Or am I just not with the right type of man? Should I try and date a guy who I usually wouldnt? Please give me some advice, because I have a lot to offer someone, and I want to start soon.
2007-09-27 11:46:14 · 13 answers · asked by Ashley 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I feel like you're describing me, I am 23 also, beautiful, in grad school, accomplished for my age and with no emotional baggage. I just recently dated this guy for about a year who presented to be an asshole just a few minutes ago (refer to my questions posted). but yes, i feel like i'm not appreciated enough, im not asking for anything outlandish, just the most common thoughtful things extended to me and reciprocated. well, you're probably amazing to be around with and honestly men cannot just commit to being with one thing, im convinced of that. Maybe its that everything else we have is somewhat threatening, they may feel they're not truly compatible, able to keep up with demands. I find that at this point most men in my life have been just what you describe, the few that have pursued me have been educated to my liking, caring, loving e.t.c.. however, they lacked the excitment that a "bad boy" brings to the table.
I'd say step back, evaluate, concentrate on other things in your life and be open to different types of people
2007-09-27 11:52:24 · answer #1 · answered by Currently Confused 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have fallen into the trap a lot of women fall into. You only like one sort of guy and you have a list of things your guy must have at first sight(mostly his appearance). You won't feel 'attracted' to any other guys.
If you go for jerks, that is just the kind of guy you like. Write down what you liked about those past guys... you will get a list of jerk personality traits. A lot of it will be stuff you will over look at first, because you like him, but will come back to haunt you.
Good guys want to be with you...but you don't give them a chance. The jerk can walk up to you, throw up on your shoes and smash the side of your car...and you will still like him. If the good guy says 'hi' and not 'hello' you won't feel anything for him.
You should try to date a guy that goes against your gut feeling....but you won't have much luck. Your gonna be stuck with jerk guys, because you can't change the way you feel. You could always try to find a slightly less of a jerk then the others guy.
2007-09-27 11:58:21 · answer #2 · answered by null_the_living_darkness 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What makes these guys jerks? From what I've read your only complaints were they - A) didnt want the same things you want B) Just want fun and no commitments. If these characteristics make a guy a jerk then yes I would suggest finding a man would be difficult for you
2007-09-27 12:22:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are still very young. Form a picture of your perfect man and work out where you would be most likely to find him.
If you want someone who is into keep fit join a gym. If you want someone who is into current affairs become a political activist.
I knew I wanted an independent woman who knew what she wanted. I found her at an "Into Business" club.
Your complaint is echoed by almost everyone at sometime in their life, so stop hunting for Mr Right and he will probably turn up when you least expect it!
Why you are attracted to jerks suggests that you are not nearly as sure of yourself as you like to think.
Stop worrying and just get on with your life. As you progress you will grow in confidence and you will find your sicial circle changes with it.
2007-09-27 11:59:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very good question, but far too many questions have to be asked of you to answer them fully; I will start with some questions of my own.
Why do you feel the need to "Start Soon”? Is it because your friends are happy and settled? And you unknowingly feel the pressure?
You sound like a great girl, who has lots to offer, but I fear you are trying to hard, MEN like a bit of mystery, they don’t like to open the book on page one and discover the ending on page 2 !
My tip for your next date, don’t try to tell them everything, to impress. Only date a man that you have that moment of excitement with, when u have eye contact. Make sure he looks back at you for that second glance, otherwise DONT DATE. Your time will come, and u will be knocked of your feet.
Hope this makes sense :)
2007-09-27 12:05:18 · answer #5 · answered by x l 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't put so much stress on dating..I had the same problem you did and I let the thought of dating out of my mind and said when it's the right time I will meet him..and not that long after like less than two months later I found my husband ^_^....take this time to enjoy yourself and have the "you" time when it is the right time you will meet him I swear it ^_^
2007-09-27 11:51:18 · answer #6 · answered by faithwalker_1 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Usually when in doubt, id do the opposite of what i normally do one time and that usualy resets all that negative stuff in my life. I have the same problems just like you, trust me try the opposite for 1 whole day and see what happens.
2007-09-27 11:51:02 · answer #7 · answered by Brooklyn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes definitely date someone you wouldn't, and it's mostly the shyer guys who are the most respectful
2007-09-27 11:52:06 · answer #8 · answered by ¿¿¿MysteryMan??? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why would u want 2 be in a relationship with a player seriously he's just gng 2 break ur heart and "hook up" w/ another girl
2016-05-20 02:14:49 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, i don't have an advice for you really, because i seem to have a similar problem. i wish you the best of luck though, seriously. dating is so complicated.
2007-09-27 11:51:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋