my b/f cheated a while ago and it took time but i forgave him but a couple of weeks ago i found out that he was talking to the girl that he cheated with. he said that it is nothing but i think it is. should i trust his word or call it off.
2007-09-27 09:23:47 · 28 answers · asked by baby 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
HHmm this is a tough situation coz it could really be nothing if he is not frequently talking to her. May be she contacted him and what not and he didn't want to be mean. So it would depend on the situation.
As for trust or call it off, I would assume that when you took him back, you forgave him and decided to give him your trust again. If that is the case, don't walk away based on this, walk away only if you are sure he violated that agreement of breaking your trust.
UNLESS when you got back together he promised to cut her off completely and he didn't and is secretly talking to her behind your back. Even then you should confront him and get the real story. If you can believe him, keep going and be silent and let him trip and catch him red handed. If you don't believe his story of why he is in touch with her and its making you angry, sad, dissapointed or disrespected than walk away.
I've been in your situation and I know exacly how you feel. Only you and him know each other well enough for you to decide what is right. Follow your heart and gut feeling. Forgive but never forget sweetie. And when he acts up, don't indulge in the anger that came from the past or react on it quickly, watch him closely, question what he does within yourself secretly and when the truth is out or when you don't feel good about being with him walk away coz you can do better than that.
No one needs a cheating, lying and disrespectful man. We are both in the same shoes so I am telling you this from the bottom of my heart.
Good luck :)
2007-09-27 09:30:45 · answer #1 · answered by Pudge_Monsta 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call it off. Trust your intuition. Obviously he's not to be trusted. Specially if you had to find out that he was talking to her instead of him just telling you. I mean if it's nothing then there shouldn't be a problem with him coming forth and telling you that they talk. But even in that case, personally, I wouldn't be comfortable with it and I think that if he was really sorry and was making an effort for the relationship to work then the least he could do is stop talkin to the hoe...
2007-09-27 16:33:37 · answer #2 · answered by Misheee! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit down with him and tell him that you have forgiven him, but you are still in the process of building your trust back. And, him talking to the girl he cheated on is not helping, if anything, it's hurting the process. So, if he would like to regain your trust, he will need to cut off all communication with this girl. AND, have him call her, with you listening, and tell her that he wants to end communication with her because your needs are the most important thing to him right now.
2007-09-27 16:27:56 · answer #3 · answered by lordmisrule2004 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Baby, it all depends on how well you trust your instincts. If you feel you are being lied to then your guts are probably correct. If you believe that he is capable of having a talk or relationship with this girl he cheated with then the decision is pretty easy. Why someone would want to continue to have a relationship with someone that they had an affair with it beyond my understanding, but what do I know.
2007-09-27 16:28:11 · answer #4 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheating can already create a kink in a relationship... if he really wants to show you that he is sorry and he wants to be with YOU and only you then he will cut off all ties with whom it was with. But don't allow him to make you feel guilty for not being able to have this person as a friend, it was his decision to create such a complicated situation, and even worse, hurt you cause he couldn't commit.
SAYING that he wants to be with you is one thing, but showing it will be the ultimate test. You shouldn't have to request that stops talking to her, but maybe that is what it will take... yet, there will be someone out there that knows you are important enough to not be treated in that manner, so just move on if he can't commit. maybe later you two will speak again, but he is obviously not ready for the healthy relationship that you are looking for.
2007-09-27 16:32:55 · answer #5 · answered by Kelsey 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call it off. You shouldn't be with someone who can't be trusted by cheating on you then continues to talk to her on top of it. It's just making you look stupid. You don't need that.
2007-09-27 16:26:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You forgave him and gave him another opportunity and he cheated again...that's gonna be it all the time. Let's just call it off and move on. You deserve someone who respects you and the relationship.
2007-09-27 16:27:29 · answer #7 · answered by bloodymary24 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust your gut. You obviously know the guy pretty well if he's your boyfriend, so if you think something's up, you're probably right. However, you don't want to assume anything. Keep him around, but don't give him your full trust. Be sure you know the facts before you decide to break it off.
2007-09-27 16:27:13 · answer #8 · answered by skubity 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust his word and see what happens, or call it off and never know (unless you called it off and he ended up with her?) I mean if you call it off I suppose it'd be a good indication to whether he really loves you or not, he'll be back if he does or he'll be pleading or very very upset. Which out of the two feels right to you deep down?
2007-09-27 16:27:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, did you trust his word the first time he cheated on you? Girl, wise up and move on to someone who treats you better and you don't have to constantly wonder about.
2007-09-27 16:26:26 · answer #10 · answered by teel2624 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋