My dad has no trust in me whatsoever. He won't even walk to the library afterschool, which is five minutes away from my school... I really need to earn some trust. Any suggestion. Also, he says I have a really bitchy attitude, I agree sort of. Any ideas on how to control my attitude?
2007-09-27 07:34:38 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I did a lot of things that are reasonable for him to have no trust, but him giving me absolutely NO freedom is making be have to go behind his back to do things.
2007-09-27 07:53:07 · update #1
OK well the first thing you'd better do is STOP going behind his back to do things. Do you really think that's going to help earn some trust? You need to SHOW him you are trustworthy. DO what you are asked to do. LIVE with the non-trusting dad for awhile because clearly you are saying you deserved not to be trusted, and you have an attitude that would drive a parent nuts!
You don't say how old you are, but if you have a bad attitude, and you know it, you are going to have to consciously control yourself. You will have to bite your tongue to stop from back-answering, and you'll have to bite the bullet and stay put if you're told to stay put! The way to "control" it is to make yourself a little less impulsive-- let your brain work before your mouth. If someone tells you to do something and the first thing you want to do is say something sarcastic back, why don't your take a deep breath and count to ten first (I'd say 4, but some people count 1234 and then you'd still blurt!)... and then think of a proper response ("Yes, dad" would be nice). Think of things from the other person's perspective instead of your own-- attitude often has to do with selfishness. You don't want to do things, and don't know (don't care?) why you are being asked to do them. Consider the concept of "not everyone's out to get you" and think about why someone might be asking you to do an errand,help out in the house, do homework. It would be to help make things run smoothly, to be part of the family unit, to help you have a better life...
Think first, act and speak consciously, not impulsively. Good luck!
2007-10-02 09:26:58 · answer #1 · answered by LJG 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Is there a reason that he does not trust you? Something that you did? Is it safe to walk to the library? If you have not given him any reason not to trust you then he is being unreasonable. Try talking to him if that is the case. Work on your attitude. Think before you speak. Why do you have an attitude? Too much stress at home? Is it always or when he won't let you do anything?
2007-09-27 07:43:28 · answer #2 · answered by kim h 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OK your dad has no trust in you,WHY? You can't walk to the library,WHY? You have a bad attitude,WHY? First thing is to find an answer to this questions,and you are the only one that could answer them,Now you know that with age come privileges and with privileges responsibilities, are you being responsible? Do you think that going behind him or having a b...attitude is being mature? If you really want your dad to trust you,you really have to work on it ,start with little things,do your chores,make sure your homework is finish, volunteer when you see him doing things,have little conversations with him,and at first don't say I'm going to..or can I go..say dad I need to go to the library,can you walk me to and from,I think that later he'll let you go by yourself.Don't think of him as a bad parent he is just protecting his little girl, I have a 15 yr old daughter and if I could I would turn myself in to her shadow not because I don't trust her but because I love her and I don't want anything bad happening to her,and at that age teens make a lot of mistakes,and is not that we forgotten what it is to be a teen is because we remember what it is to be one that we try to teach our children not to make the same mistakes we made,but unfortunately kids don't see it that way .By the way how old r u? because that has a lot to do with him being like that.
2007-10-04 12:01:34 · answer #3 · answered by emerald 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your father loves you and is only trying to keep you safe.You sound like a spoiled brat.Do you know how lucky you are to have a dad at all? and,one who shows you how much he loves you.Its not that he doesn't trust you,its the mean ole world he doesn't trust. Read the newspapers you will see how many girls disappear never to be heard from.Or run away and get sold into prostitution.As for your attitude,try doing some volunteer work at a old folks home or hospital.you will quickly see how good you have it.Quit whinning and look at the world.See it for what it is you will drop the attitude.
2007-10-04 13:58:50 · answer #4 · answered by lotteda717 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to communicate with your Dad let him know whats going on in your life.
Include him on your everyday doings, school, friends etc.
Have a Dad and daughter day
The more you lie the more he will not trust you lying gets you no were trust me I have a teenage daughter and she lost my trust a few times.
Dads are very protective of their teenage daughters.
So it's best to just talk with him carry a cell phone and tell him you will call him as soon as you get to your destination.
It's a crazy world out there to may freaks in this world today so try to understand were he's coming from.
2007-10-04 13:01:42 · answer #5 · answered by Michele H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Grow up b. Put yourself in his shoes and then look at YOU. You sound like a snobby little brat. Grow up. Trust and respect can't be bought or tricked into. EARN IT! Your attitude sucks because you are selfish and think the world is here just for you. It ain't. Show a little respect and thank your dad for bringing you up and taking care of you. Then, get on your knees and beg him to forgive you. I'll bet he can't wait for you to move out. I'll bet you a million bucks YOU are the one that will be sorry when daddy isn't there any more to take care of you and your ingratitude. You make me sick.
2007-10-04 22:20:49 · answer #6 · answered by hawkinthehouse 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i see where ur comming from i had a bitchy attitude also u have to teach ur self to comtrol it believe me sometimes its not easy u just have to keep ur mouth shut then vent where ur by yourself. as for the not trusting issue if u gave him reason to not to trust u then u just have to wait and gain his trust back do things around the house with out having to be asked to do listen to him and start talking to him ask him what u need to do to start to earn his trust back and go from there. but u have to Stop going behind his back ur the child he is the parent.
2007-10-04 11:25:27 · answer #7 · answered by Rachel T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you gain trust with time just do what he says sit and act normal act like the daughter from heaven and dnt do 1 thing out of place. and no talking back within 3 months if theres absoulutely no improvement sit down and talk 2 him about how uve been good bla bla and dnt raise your voice or get mad or cry. chances are hell understand
2007-10-04 05:12:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should change. Try to prove him with acts that you mean it. The results will come without expecting and fast. It all depends on you. Good luck! ;)
2007-10-05 03:06:06 · answer #9 · answered by RandomChildishWall 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not bitchy attitude it's very disrespectful
2007-10-04 18:38:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋