You know sexuality is a part of being a human, kids these day are not only having sex, they're getting married at such an early age. If you can have these two choices, which one would you choose for your child?
1. Early marriage, but children must have abstinence before marriage?
2. Have premarital sex but choose not to get married until they're emotionally mature.
I would personally let my child to choose #2, because first I will be a hypocrite to tell my son or daughter to close their leg, because I had sex before marriage, secondly I feel they shouldn't get married if they're emotionally immature. It's a bigger commitment than having sex.
I understand alot of parents would say I want neither I want my kids to stay a virgin and get marry later. but ask your self that you're being reasonable, can your children really wait that long.
2007-09-27 04:37:27 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I also think they would have more chance to be successful in life if they're not tied down by marriage
2007-09-27 04:50:07 · update #1
Actually, I happily married for 10 years, don't judge people when you don't even know me
2007-09-27 05:18:56 · update #2
I would not want my son to get married until in his 30s, to say I want my son not to have sex until in his 30s, it's an unrealistic expectation. So, it's definately number 2 for me, I want him to finish all his school and be successful in life first before settling down.
To the zoo keeper, you consider your self to be a christian when you're being so judgmental?
2007-09-27 05:35:04 · answer #1 · answered by 結縁 Heemei 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
2
2007-09-27 04:40:21 · answer #2 · answered by Matthew O 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Depends on age.........I would not what my children to marry before the age of 25. Too many opportunities for school and careers now a days. Even women must work to contribute equally to the family, so college and career are important. Plus, I think a lot of great experiences happen between 18-25. It's a time in a young person life where they can travel, get a master's degree, volunteer, etc.....
So #1 is out.
I would pick #2, but with certain criteria. One, they have to be in college/20's if they are going to be participating in such and adult activity. They also so be FULLY informed about STD's, birth control and condoms.
I'm only saying #2, b/c it's not logical for someone would gets married at 27, to wait until they are that old to have sex.
I don't think pre-marital sex is bad, if done in a safe and healthy way. I've been with my guy for 3 years and we have sex...........we are not married.
But, we are in a loving, long term and committed relationship. It's a much different situation, we are NOT just sleeping around. That's wrong.
2007-09-27 04:44:11 · answer #3 · answered by Miss Answers 2007 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Wow good question I have a 6 year old and I often though which would I want her to be sexually active at lets say 17 (I will not think of her doing it any younger and you can't make me) or getting married not being mature enough to handle it, as a mother I would love for my daughter to stay a virgin until she is 50 or become a nun, I know both of those will never happen. I guess if I had to choose I would want her to be responsible in her sexuality, I do believe that having more than one partner is heathy for a woman, in moderation of-course, this way she can know what she like and does not like. You are right marriage is a bigger responsibility than having sex, and any one who thinks differently is a moron, I am Christian and know a lot about the history of sex, only resonantly (in the past 300 years or so) did sex before marriage become taboo contrary to belief, even after Christianity was formed it was not bad to have sex before marriage, it was only bad to have sex with some one other than your partner once married. Virginity did not become a virtue until the early 1700's. I would love to have my daughter stay a virgin until she is mature enough to handle every thing that sex in-tales which to be honest is in my opinion about the ages between 19-23 depending on the girls maturity.
2007-09-27 04:49:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
1. Early marriage, but children must have abstinence before marriage?
....would be my answer.
I didn't wait and I wouldn't feel a bit like a hypocrite telling my children to wait. I call it "experience talking."
I married a virgin and I wish I had waited (yes, I am a guy!). It would have been special to learn all those things with this great girl and travel down the path together.
She didn't have a problem with me, but I do. But there is nothing I can do about it now.
None of the chicks I knew didn't deserve the joy that kind of sharing can give to a couple.
But, being in reality, if they want to do it, then I don't find providing a safe environment ---like their rooms--where condoms and advice are available and the law can't have free reign to make up things against your son (or---less chance---your daughter) a hypocritical or stupid idea (it is better than under a bridge with (unbeknownst to the kids) a dozen whino's watching through the windshield!
I wish you well, but it is NOT impossible to teach/train your kids to wait.
2007-09-27 04:39:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
2. With protection and two types at that. I just recently got married, 27 years old I got pregnant with my daughter at 17. I married her father almost 10 years later, but there is really no way to tell her not to have premarial sex, when I did and she knows it for a fact lol.
Getting pregnant is no reason to rush into marriage and wanting to have sex is no reason to rush into marriage either.
2007-09-27 04:53:05 · answer #6 · answered by his wife 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You probably aren't married, or else you have a really unhealthy marriage to say that marriage ties you down and holds you back in life. If that's how your boyfriend makes you feel then you need to kick him to the curb.
I would choose #1. Yes, I had premarital sex, but teaching my children to not make the same mistakes I made does not make me a hypocrite, it makes me a good mom. Also, I wasn't raised as a Christian, and didn't know that it was wrong to do so. Now that I am faithful to the Lord, I know that it is wrong and it would be worse to teach that as acceptable. So, my answer is #1.
2007-09-27 05:14:02 · answer #7 · answered by thezookeeper 4 · 3⤊ 3⤋
I go with number 2. I think it's an almost antiquated notion that people should stay virgins until they're married. Sure, it's that special thing that you're supposed to share with that special someone, but what if you get married and find out you're not sexually compatible? Sex isn't the main thing that a marriage should be, but it's something that is supposed to be enjoyed BY the couple. If you can't enjoy it, someone's going to stray.
2007-09-27 04:41:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
Number 2, that's what I did. I just would want them to be responsible about it (and I will teach them about how, when they're older). If it were up to me.
As long as they take care of themselves I have nothing else to say on the topic - the most important thing is that they're happy. That is all I want or could ever want for my children.
2007-09-27 04:42:09 · answer #9 · answered by KC 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
DEF # 2, with of course knowledge of protection/ sex itself
I would not want my daughter to get married young-I want her to experience life, travel, finish college have a career.
I would hope that I am bringing her up with morals and enough self confidence to know what choices to make when the time comes.
2007-09-27 04:46:47 · answer #10 · answered by Willow 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋