How do people in a relationship wait until marriage to have sex?

Question

My boyfriend of 2 months said he wants to stop kissing me.

I am in my 20's, have my first boyfriend. I am his first serious girlfriend as well.

We both want to wait till after marriage to have sex, since we both have strong morals and are very religious. He said that he wants to stop kissing me because he gets excited, aroused and tempted. Things run through his mind and wants to take thing further. So he made up this rule to stop kissing me so he wont get tempted, as he feels weak.

How do other couples manage this situation, how do they wait till marriage. What can i tell him. I said that i will try to be the strongest one out of both of us.

Answer 1

My husband and I waited until we were married to have sex.

While we dated we hardly ever spent any alone time, in the dark where people can easily hide, or be out too late at night so that we'd be too tired to think things straight through.

We scheduled our dates early enough so we could spend quality time, yet be back to our homes around 10-11 p.m.
We also went out with a group of friends and all of our dates consisted of a purpose, not to just "hang around," and get bored and then resort to making out for the heck of it. We went road tripping, we went out with friends to amusement parks or the zoo, we visited his friends, or mine and hung out there at their place, or we had a movie/dinner/arcade date.

We both made the decision, way before we started dating, that we wanted to waited until after marriage to have sex, so that when temptation came, we didn't have to think about it anymore, the decision to not go any further before marriage has already been made.

Our dating life seemed loaded with fun, we did kiss, but not to the point that we both got so excited that we could not have helped ourselves, we were around people most of the time.

We've been married for almost 3 years now and we have a beautiful and happy marriage because it started on a foundation of trust, not only for each other, but that we both are capable of making good decisions that can potentially affect each other's happiness. If you can't trust yourself or your partner, you're not setting yourself up for a long and meaningful relationship.

Answer 2

Remember that in a marriage the Man is the spiritual leader, so if he says he need to hold of on kissing respect that. As long as you are sure that he is being faithful. If so just wait with him. If he is true marriage will come soon. There is plenty of time for Sex. Its a beautiful thing when you do it as God intended. Pray about it!:)

Answer 3

I waited until I was married. Don't put yourselves in places where you are alone to often. It is fine during the day or at night when you are out but stay out of each others apartment after ten PM. You have a very special man in your life who is trying to do the right thing. Be very careful how you dress do not show a whole lot of skin or wear skin tight outfits. May the Lord Bless you both as you follow His will for your life.

Answer 4

My wife was a virgin when we married. She was 31. She waited. She went to seminary and when she dated they were not allowed to hold hands, kiss, or be alone with who they were dating in order to prevent temptation. I obstained for three years prior to marrying my wife. This was my second marriage. We did kiss but there were many times we had to stop, withhold from kissing, and keep are distance because of the thoughts I would have or she would have.

Your boyfriend is honoring you by stepping back. He is respecting God's commands, you, and ya'lls relationship. Be patient and love him in return. I Cor. 10 talks about love. Love is patient, love is kind and so on. Love is enduring.......

When we were dating a friend told me of the three to's. To alone, To tired, and To late.

Avoid the three To's.

Best wishes, and Blessings.

Answer 5

My husband and I waited. It was extremely difficult, but it was the right decision for us. We made ourselves accountable to an older married couple who would call each of us and check up on how we were doing. We knew we couldn't lie to them, and we didn't want to carry any guilt around. Your boyfriend is smart - this is what we had to do also. We had to draw a line and stick to it. Make sure you guys try to avoid situations where you will be tempted.

Answer 6

He may be on the right track. Most Christians who believe in abstenance continue to kiss and just ignore the temptations. If it gets too hot in the kitchen it's time to get out. At least you and your boyfriend are striving to be faithful... that is awesome! Those who can be faithful before marriage will find they are much more likely to be faithful during marriage.

Paul has some advice...

1 Cor. 7: 9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

If he cannot wait until marriage, well... the scriptures say nothing against having a date with Rosy Palm, if you get my drift. He probably already has LOL! Better that than getting into a marriage before you are ready, or committing fornication which is as corrosive to the soul as sulfuric acid. Often those who give in and fornicate find out that the friends they loved become strangers they no longer love.

Answer 7

Don't do things alone together. Even talking on the phone can become exciting --though trying to be careful-- so you may want to limit speaking to each other to very public situations.

Always have other people around you then, who respect & encourage your decision to wait. Peopel who are bodily close to one another, often become physically 'hooked' on one another's scent without realizing it, so it is very important to protect yourself in this way.

Consider what the Bible has to say about this subject, as in the following, on-line articles & the Scriptures linked within them. Following such guidance can only strengthen your very commendable resolve. (;

Answer 8

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sounds like she's obsessed with you and it's really up to you to make the decision that you feel is right. would you feel like you would be taking advantage of her? because i think you would be since she told you she wanted to wait till marriage! she's being lame if she's willing to give up her morals for you. she needs to be true to herself and obviously you need to make her realize that and not have sex with her until marriage.

Answer 9

I beleive in destiny but I still think you have to fight to save your marriage. Especially if you have children.
This ebook is a good resource to understand causes of your marital issues and to learn some important tips --> http://savemarriage.toptips.org

Answer 10

I sympathize with you....Because I am a virgin and I have never had a serious boyfriend, but I can still relate to the temptation thing...

I say that you should try to keep God first....

Think about what your intentions are for the relationship...

What are your intentions in this relationship and what are his...

I say pray a lot about it as well....pray, pray, pray....and, again, you have to keep God in the midst of it.....