Ok, so I am 14 years old and my parents are divorced. I've been living with my mom for my entire life and I've decided that I want to move to my dad's because I think I'll become a happier(because all of my best friends live in the same town as my dad) and more successful(because over there I'll join some extra-curricular activity because my friends are there). My mom, I think, has anger issues because she always yells at me for dumb things (like entering the room when she's on the computer and leaving stuff on the floor). By yelling, I MEAN yelling, not talking loudly, YELLING. So I ask my dad to talk to my mom about it and he did. She freaked out and said I'll become like my dad(lazy) and become unsuccessful. She also thinks my friends will change me into a bad person(but she doesn't care about my brother's friends, and HE GOT CAUGHT SMOKING POT WITH THEM). So yeah, I told her that I won't change and she wouldn't listen and she continued to yell. So i wrote her a 2 page letter(contd)
2007-09-26 08:09:18 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
about why I should move over there, and trust me they're good reasons but I'm waiting for my best friend's letters(about why I should move back and how it'd affect them) to come and also I'm waiting for the perfect timing to give it to her
Is she unreasonable??
2007-09-26 08:10:48 · update #1
and I also haven't talked to her for 4 days because she has made me so angry.
2007-09-26 08:11:38 · update #2
I don't want to bring it to the court though
2007-09-26 08:14:21 · update #3
I forgot to say my mom said "NO WAY"
2007-09-26 08:17:21 · update #4
I know exactly how you feel i am 17 years old and my parents divorced when i was 13.It was really hard and stressfull because when one is angry at the other they tend to take it out on you.I was put in your same position..i was living with my dad and wanting to live with my mom.You are old enough to make your own dicision on who you want to live with. But be gentle about bringing it up ..although she is unreasonable she is still your mom ..let her know that your not leaving because you dont like being with her ...tell her you feel like you could make better of yourself there and that is where all your friends are...just me mature and maybe she will see it your way..
good luck
2007-09-26 08:18:55 · answer #1 · answered by Skye W 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Honestly, I think she's forcing you to make your grades a priority by taking away your facebook privileges. Not having access to your facebook account doesn't stop you from socializing, it stops you from getting on facebook. You didn't say she grounded you either, so I'm guessing you can still go out and hang out with friends face to face. This really seems pretty minor. She stopped you from going to one site until you have an A. I think it is really going to motivate you to get your grade up in that class, and then you'll have your account back. You are not entitled to a facebook account, and it seems like that is where part of the problem is. Your Mom is taking it away, I know it sucks, but if you do well on this test which isn't even a week away, you can get back on. She isn't a psycho Mom for wanting to know what you are doing online and controlling what you do an do not have access to. I think she is being perfectly fair here, she is giving you an opportunity to earn your facebook account back. You've only been in class for a few weeks and you're already down to a C, she doesn't want that to last too long because it will be harder to dig yourself out of it. Do you have a cell phone? Most plans have unlimited nights and weekends so you can talk tons. Maybe you could go out with friends? Maybe you could use IM off of gmail or yahoo.
2016-05-19 01:48:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No,
i don't think so,
You should respect your mother it is so difficult for single mothers, you are still a child so you can't see that.
You need to knock on your mothers door out of respect,
she could be dressing, and doing , well women need privacy,
Just because she happened to be on the computer at that time doesn't mean she won't be naked the next time.
So please respect her and listen to her, she only wants what is best for you,
As far as your brother, well he is older and , he was exposed to the negative enviornment of your mother and father during their marriage.
Pot is wrong and your smart enough to know this.
Your mother wants to save you she knows your brother is lost already, and there is very little she can do to help him change.
I can only see bad things happening for you with your father and friends.
Do you help your mother?
To wash the laundry, and the dishes, and clean up the house?
Do you come straight home, and call her to let her know where you are, and ASK if you can be with your friends.
Are you getting Good grades, and doing your homework?
Maybe if you were to help her and show her how you can be responsible, she might be able to relax, and see you as an Adult,
Also you will see how stressful it is to be an adult ,
Does your mother ever have time for herself, time for a manicure or pedicure,
trust me, being a parent isn't as easy as just letting you move to your fathers,
Also remember, if your father has custody of you, how will your mother support herself?
Your father will no longer send her money for support,
Would it be ok with you if she was hurt, and sad.
I would not be ok with my mother suffering because of me.
These are some things you can think about.
Hope it helps you,
And thanks for the great website.
Meg
2007-09-26 11:25:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your mom is probably really busy with work if she does? well it looks like she needs to out the computer away and talk to you some more or start i have a 15 year daughter an dwe try to do that at least once a day , put she gets mad at me when i tell her to pick up her room but that is normal your mom is probably frightened that you do not need her any more . i simply tell my daughter that i enjoy her presence and that i need to have coffee with her or go shopping even for groceries. if you could do a little bit of house work with out being told then maybe you could talk to her let her know you still love her but think it would be best if you lioved with your father
2007-09-26 08:24:05 · answer #4 · answered by Jill B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I believe that you are old enough to choose. Have your father take the issue to court. If he's willing to fight for your custody, and you tell the court that this is where you want to live, and there is no reason (like he runs drugs out of his house or is a pimp) to not allow you to live there, then I am fairly certian this issue will be resolved and you'll be living with your father soon.
2007-09-26 08:17:34 · answer #5 · answered by Mama's on the half tip 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yeah she's crazy man, i guess they would have to bring it into court until youre 18 and you can make the decision by yourself. but i feel ya man, im 14 too and my parents do retarded stuff but i still talk to them. dont become some emo deal with your problems and then just stay with your dad anyways.
2007-09-26 08:36:09 · answer #6 · answered by V 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Since you are 14, you have the legal right to decide which parent to live with (in most States).
Ultimately, the decision is yours.
2007-09-26 08:15:34 · answer #7 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can tell the courts that you want to go. They will most likely listen to you.
2007-09-26 08:13:37 · answer #8 · answered by RedRabbit 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think shes right you may think that your mom is wrong & all but once you get older you will understand why
it up to you if you wanna live with your dad or mom
2007-09-26 08:17:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you're old enough now, it shouldn't be an issue with the courts if you want to live with your father and he's okay with it
2007-09-26 08:16:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋