I suffer from depression and anxiety and recently revealed this to my bf as I am considering taking meds again. We ended up having a long discussion about me being molested as a child and how my molestor was never arrested/confronted. My bf seems to think that this lack of closure has resulted in my having problems with depression and anxiety now.
But I don't know how I should go about getting closure. This happened more than 30 years ago. I've been to counseling and thought my closure was being able to tell my family what happened. I've done that and haven't wanted to re-hash the details with another counselor as it is painful.
I googled the guy in an attempt to at least locate him or see if there was pending criminal action against him but was unsuccessful. Re-visiting the situation has also made me wonder if I could have prevented abuse to someone else. I'm not allowing myself to feel guilty for this as I was only five when the abuse occurred.
Any suggestions?
2007-09-26 07:28:56 · 4 answers · asked by trysh_mc 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
PLEASE do not confront your abuser...!! That is the last thing you need to do.
I was also abused in the same way as you, and was also abused in other ways (my father)..... i have severed all ties with him and have come to realize some things.
My abuser is a VERY ILL person... otherwise, he'd never have done this.. My abuser refused to seek help... and there is nothing i can do about it; however i got help.
You will never forget the incident(s) but you can certainly find ways to cope.. and get some direction from a good therapist. There are also many self-help sites on line, such as the ones i listed below.
You can also do a search for SEXUAL ABUSE SELF-HELP, and SURVIVING SEXUAL ABUSE.
Hon, if taking meds will be helpful, then do it... you really need to face your own pain and issues... talking with someone is sometimes very helpful. I'd also suggest searching for Sexual Abuse Survivor Forums... many people have had the same experiences as you, and are posting daily... lots of good advice and help online, that's for sure.
sending warm hugs and good thoughts for your recovery and future.
2007-09-26 07:39:41 · answer #1 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let go of the past. Turn it over to God. Pray and He will help you put it behind you. I speak from experience. I was molested many times growing up. With my deep faith and my loving Father, together we have put it so far in the past. It seems like another life time ago. Great faith with earnest pray creates amazing healing! May God grant you that!
2007-09-26 15:01:32 · answer #2 · answered by KLS5750 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do not blame yourself
as you stated this was 30 years ago
look to the future not the past
and reach out to others with a similar experience and help them in recovery
you have to give what you want to receive
so help others get closure and you will get closure
2007-09-26 14:37:58 · answer #3 · answered by mmmkay_us 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really can only get closure if you are ready. Maybe give counseling a try again and see where it takes you.
2007-09-26 14:34:24 · answer #4 · answered by b 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋