Hi,
My husband of 2 years and I went on a holiday to Bangkok. We visited a dance bar. My hubby fell for a topless dancer and divorced me. This was 2 years ago. I developed a fear of any relationship since.
For the last 10 months, I have been going out with a nice guy. He wants us to hit the sack but I have been asking for more time. He will jump at the first chance but has been okay so far.
He was very active sexually but has been sober for a while. I hope he continues that way.
We live in London. We spend evenings together.
His company is asking him to go to Bangkok for a month. I am now afraid. If he sleeps with any girl, our relationship will be finished. I know how tough it is for men to control themselves in Bangkok. My BF promises to be a good boy but I am getting nervous. I lost a hubby (good riddance). A second loss, I won't be able to take. How do I save my love from the Thai beauties?
2007-09-26 05:03:49 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'd be wondering why it is you're hooking up with guys that have to eventually go to Bangkok? That's a little weird. Maybe for some reason you have a remote connection with Thailand?
Don't allow him to go.
2007-09-26 05:09:41 · answer #1 · answered by lu_dicrous 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some time when you have him alone and not distracted with other chaos, take him aside and carefully explain your fears to him. Ideally, you could arrange to go with him (not under company expense of course) as a vacation for you also. You can sort of keep an eye on him and there are a lot of cool tourist attractions in Thailand (besides hookers). If all else fails, there are some companies in the UK that sell male chastity belts!
I wish you luck, I know how hard it is for guys to stay out of trouble, because I'm a guy.
2007-09-26 05:24:03 · answer #2 · answered by Flying Dragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, that's a tough one. If he was very sexually active before, and you haven't given up the booty in 10 months, I really doubt that all the willpower in the world could stand up to the onslaught of Bangkok beauties that are sure to beset him.
But, if you were to satiate his appetite prior to his leaving, he would be less likely to succomb to their advances.
Good Luck!
2007-09-26 05:10:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ten months is a long time not to have sex . You need to do what is right for you , but i can tell you most guys wont stick around for 10 months . If he is sticking around for 10 months then i think he is the real deal .
If you make him stick around any longer without sex you might fuffill a selffuffilling prophesey . Your needs come first of course but unless you never had sex before in your life i think the time would be right for you to sleep with him . He seems to be committed .
Sexual compatability is going to be important .You have made him wait and he waited and now that is good . The bad thing about this is he is going to think that the sex is going to be awesome since he waited so long to get it . Once you finaly have sex with him have him please you but also keep in mind he will have needs as well .
It would be terrible if he liked oral sex and you did not or vice versa .
Precisley becuase there was a huge delay in having sex ( a big wind up so to speak your going to be agressive in getting your needs taken care of however do not forget about his needs )
He proved himself to you by waiting . Now you need to prove yourself to him in areas of sexual compatabilty and compromise .
2007-09-26 06:24:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this is going to sound harsh... but it is difficult for american gals to compete with asian women in the areas of sex and submissiveness. If those things are not that big of a deal to your BF, then you have no worries... things will be fine. That is the edge that the asian gal's have over most American gal's. Realisticly, The asian gal's have no common interests with american men, i.e. novelists, culture, et al... and therefore, the relationships are short lived, unless the asian gal lives here in America. No offense intended, it's just IMHO.
2007-09-26 05:10:35 · answer #5 · answered by Zipperhead 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, that's a hard one..
I'm sorry that happened to you. You should give your new b/f the benefit of the doubt, he is not your ex husband, give him a chance, this could be perfect for you..if he comes back and hasn't done any wrong, you should know without any doubts that he really loves you..I know this is hard for you and I don't really know how to help you calm down and not worry over this. I'm sorry, maybe another answerer will help better...Goodluck and GodBless...
2007-09-26 05:14:20 · answer #6 · answered by Missy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your just going to have to trust the new bf. The first husband was a low life and you have to get over your insecurities.
2007-09-26 05:13:58 · answer #7 · answered by Lou 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋