When a 9 year old asks an x-rated question how graphic should the responce be?

Question

My nine year old was in the library with her biological father, (not my husband) and tried to find answers about starting a peroid. Instead of finding something at her leval she found a book that was rather graphic for her age group.
My daughter is very bright and smart.

Answer 1

At nine years old, she should "get the information from you"
Not only where babies come from, and how, but what sex is
how it it preformed, and what is not okay when someone
trys to touch her inappropriately. This is your moral background for her teen years. Keep the doors of communication open, and you'll be better able to protect
her in a normal healthy way!

Answer 2

If you feel comfortable I think you should just tell her the straight facts about it. It sounds like she's smart enough to deal with it, and she is getting close to the age when she will start anyway. I started when I was 11 (I knew others who started earlier), and thank God I had just had a sex-ed class (my parents never ever brought up the topic) or I would've been mortified. :P If you're not completely comfortable just talking to her, why don't you visit the library or book store and try to find a book that you feel is appropriate. Failing that, bring it up at her next visit with the family doctor.

Answer 3

You need to sit her down and talk to her, do not let her learn about this from books or from school. It is very important that she knows what soon will be happening to her body, and it is even more important that she hear it from her mother. That way, she feels more like she can come to you with other questions and you won't send her to the library or hand her a pamplet and call it good. I might sound overly dramatic, but you need to open those lines of communication.

Answer 4

I think you need to sit down and talk to her about what a period is all about. She should not have to look that up in a book. She will be fine for the talk at this age. Some girls start their period around 10 and 11. So instead of having her wake up one morning screaming to the top of her lungs because something strange is happening down below, sit down and tell her what she needs to know. The sooner you talk with her, the better chance you have of protecting her later on.

Answer 5

You should talk to her to find out what she learned. This is a tricky topic, and most likely what she learned was appropriate for her. You need to see what she thinks though. If this planted a seed of curiosity about sex, you may need to give her a longer talk. But if she just learned about the mechanics of ovulation, you may be able to wait a while before giving the other half of the sex talk (the half about boys and relationships).

Also, don't get mad at the dad. Maybe he should have deferred this question to you, but I think it is best that he tried to find her a straight answer--when people play games about answering your question, even kids know that they aren't anxious to give you the unfiltered truth, and you want to be believed by your daughter when you talk about this. And when she's twelve and has more questions, you want her coming to you, not assuming you would give her a stupid answer to keep her innocent.

Answer 6

What you say depends on the intelligence and maturity of the child. The rule of thumb is that if they're old enough to ask, they're old enough to be told the truth. Just be sure you know know what the question is! (One little boy asked his dad where he came from, and after Dad gave him the birds and bees lecture, the boy said, "Oh. Billie said he came from Cleveland...."). Probably by 9 there's nothing you can't tell her. If it's something she's not ready to hear, kids have a built-in filter that blocks out such stuff. They may hear it, but it's just white noise to them and they don't retain any of it. Don't worry, Mom, answer away.

Answer 7

Periods are not x-rated. Maybe her father should have been a little more watchful over her choice of book, but he's a guy, and she's his baby, he was probably too embarrassed to even look at it with her. I started my period at 11, and that was in the early 80's. Girls are starting them younger and younger now, so you need to talk to her about this NOW. She needs to be fully informed of what's going to happen with her body, and of how babies are made so she does not end up a pregnant 10 year-old.

Answer 8

idon;t think asking a question about her period is x rated, these thing s are only if you let them be/ There is nothing that is really too graphic when you are describing her period this isn;t sex, all she has to know is that she can get pregnant when she gets her period and that is all she needs to know about the x rated part of the period, otherwise you can;t be too graphic when talking about the period, it is a totally natural thing! every woman has a vagina and it doesn;t have to be a dirty and x rated thing, you need to tell her though that the some of the things you talk about like sex or her period shouldn;t be talked too much in detail with her friends as she should know that some parents arent as open with their children about sex and the period, you see she can go to alot of places to find out these things and it is better heard from someone who loves and cares for her and is told in a mannerl;y fashion and don;t use nicknames for things use the words vagina and breasts etc, the period is a serious thing for a young girl i was 10 when i started my period and i was really glad that my mom told me that what that meant was that i could have a baby, it wasn;t just something that happened every month, and then she also explained how i would possibly be feeling, and exactly what was happening with the body when we get our period, you can;t be too graphic with this thing, really it isn;t sex? the thing is communication yyou want to leave ALL doors open, and tell her she can come and talk to you about ANYTHING NO MATTER WHAT especially about sex i have two boys aged 12 and 8, i have six sisters and the most important thing my mother told me was that i could ask her anythjng anything you want her to know no matter what you will be there for her and that her body is a beautiful thing that should be respected, the best thing is information, she needs to hear it from you so don;t worry so muchy about x rated (your period isn;t x rated) you wouldn;t beleive how many girls even ask on here how to put a tampon in,? they can;t figure it out, and this site is great, but it really should be her mother orher aunt or grandma helping this poor girl how to figure out how to put a tampon in, your daughter needs to know she can come and ask YOU something as simple as that and these girls have NO IDEA, AND THEY ARE SCARED TO ASK THEIR FRIENDS OR THEIR MOTHER it shouldn;t be this way, my mom let me know i could ask her anything, and i know that is why i didn;t end up pregnant at 15 like some of my friends as a good mother informs their children, in a loving way. Sex is xrated and needs to be spoken carefully for the age groups but something like a period shouldn;t be considered x rated the fact is she could start her period at 10 like i did, and talking about the vagina and all that goes with menstrations shouldn;t be considered xrated it happens to EVERY WOMAN AND IT ISN;T A DIRTY THING OR X RATED i means she should knowthe propoer terms hope this hleped a bit, good luck
baby

Answer 9

Was the book about periods and things....if so, at 9 years old this should be fine. At 9, a girl can actually have her period...although this is early. So she should know everything possible about it by now.

Answer 10

an age appropriate response is the best way to address any issue. Also, "American Girls" has some books on a variety of subjects including puberty.

check out the website listed below.