He has this extremely high sex drive and I just can't seem to keep up with him. If he doesn't get any for more than a couple days I can sense a change in his attitude. He swears he isn't mad about sex but I know different. If I have sex with him (or something similiar) at least everyday he is lovable and sweet, but as soon as I don't jump in the sack ready to go every night he gets edgy and irritable and sometimes totally ignores me. Sometimes I have sex with him just because I want some attention! It seems like our whole relationship revolves around his sex drive. Before we got married, he told me his ex wife never had sex with him and that is why their marriage ended. Now I am beginning to think he will leave me to or stray if I don't continually give in to him even when I don't want to. He swears he loves me and would never stray but if he truely is addicted, will he go for the first piece of a** that is thrown at him if I go for a week or two without having sex with him???
2007-09-25 16:20:50 · 15 answers · asked by Kelly 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
My husband is 9 years older than me.....
2007-09-25 16:36:54 · update #1
This is just simply a matter of different sex drives. There is nothing wrong with that, and many people have to cope with that in their relationships. I suggest that you talk to him about how you feel and see how he reacts. He should be willing to compromise with you on the amount of sex that you have. You shouldnt always have to give in because you fear that he is going to leave you. That would be unfair. Another thing to consider: has he always been this way?
2007-09-25 16:26:57 · answer #1 · answered by U2 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I have almost the same problem. I have an enormous sex drive, but my girlfriend goes through "phases." One week she is ravenous..and a couple of weeks later it seems like someone throws a switch and she's not interested...and sometimes I'll get irritable if we go several days without.
If your husband really loves you...then he won't stray. Maybe he's addicted to sex...but with YOU!
What he needs is consistency. IF the 2 of you agree on, say 2 or 3 times a week (more if you're in the mood..but no less) then he'll at least know when he's going to get it. The sexual tension will be lifted and he wont be after you all the time...this will also give you a "break"...and he won't be so irritable if he knows that," if not tonight...then tomorrow for sure!" Let him know what your "cycle" is like...when you are "horny" and when you are PMS-ing and tell him "This is the week when I just do not want to be touched!"...But that you'll make it up to him the week after. You can't run your life based on his sex drive...but he can't run his based on your either!
Compromise and communication are the keys to everything.
Talk to him about your concerns...tell him that you love him and love making love with him...and if he "tones it down" a bit - then you'd be willing to "tone it up" a bit..and the 2 of you meet in the middle.
I wish you both the best!
2007-09-25 16:48:28 · answer #2 · answered by MACHNGUN 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your husband really loves you...then he won't stray. Maybe he's addicted to sex...but with YOU!
What he needs is consistency. IF the 2 of you agree on, say 2 or 3 times a week (more if you're in the mood..but no less) then he'll at least know when he's going to get it. The sexual tension will be lifted and he wont be after you all the time...this will also give you a "break"...and he won't be so irritable if he knows that," if not tonight...then tomorrow for sure!" Let him know what your "cycle" is like...when you are "horny" and when you are PMS-ing and tell him "This is the week when I just do not want to be touched!"...But that you'll make it up to him the week after. You can't run your life based on his sex drive...but he can't run his based on your either!
Compromise and communication are the keys to everything.
the best way to slow down him is u u be more romantic, and start asking him for sex daily, as many times as he can ... also, ask him the way he wants to sex, by which he gets satisfaction. ... and let him do in that way ... am sure u will notice slow down in his sexual desire, once he start getting full satisfaction ....
2007-09-25 20:52:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he appears to have a high sex drive but also believes in quantity not quality sex which is the line that needs to be pursued. You do need a counsellor but it will only be effective if both agree to follow the guidance given. Each person/couple are unique and therefore need to be treated accordingly. Get advice.
2016-05-18 22:35:07 · answer #4 · answered by anika 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds very odd, he likes you because of sex? thats ridiculous. I think this guy is ready to cheat if you dont give him what you want. He should relax a bit or masturbate. I think your in over your head - this guy is a bit arrogant thinking about sex to the extent of dumping his wife for not giving him any, I hope he doesn't do the same to you - he sounds addicted.
2007-09-25 16:25:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sex is not the answer to a marriage,he has to remember it is two that took vows to marriage and if you give him all he wants in three times a week,you two need a hobby to spend some of that angry.let him know you love him strong and hold on to him.You didn"t say if there was a great age different between you. you may need to talk to your priest. good love Betty
2007-09-25 16:35:45 · answer #6 · answered by betty_43113 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
one cannot say it is addiction... but certainly more sexy .... it is common ....
well.... everything depends on how u cooperate him for sex .....
the best way to slow down him is u u be more romantic, and start asking him for sex daily, as many times as he can ... also, ask him the way he wants to sex, by which he gets satisfaction. ... and let him do in that way ... am sure u will notice slow down in his sexual desire, once he start getting full satisfaction ....
also, as he is sex lover, he will never leave u ...
2007-09-25 16:31:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe he is a sex addict, Men express love by physical contact (sex). Women express it mentally (conversation).
2007-09-25 16:33:00 · answer #8 · answered by lucidwillow 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Learn more about sex addiction and make your own decision about how to approach him here:
www.sexaa.org
2007-09-26 11:37:56 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're tired or really don't want to have sex and he doesn't care.....there's a problem
I'm not a professional so I don't know if he's a sex addict or not.......so a professional therapist can help you.
2007-09-25 16:24:46 · answer #10 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋