My friend is 27, has completed her M.Sc. with a pleasant personality. She has been engaged for 1 year and the date of wedding is decided to be within next few months. She says that she is not interested in getting married. there is no strong reason sometimes she says that her fiancy is not good looking or some times she argues that she do not want to take responsibilities after getting married or object the age difference (he is 35) or says that she want to do job and have want to have a better carrer. we are not clear that what is the actual reason. and according to our opinion it was a good proposal, well educated, nice family , normal looks of the person (not ugly). her parents say that they cannot wait now as she is already 27 furthermore they think that it will be a perfect match for her. any one suggest what is the reason that she behave so and what should we do.
2007-09-24 19:57:28 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
Ugh, arranged marriages. If she doesn't want to get married, why are her parents forcing her to marry someone so much older than she is, in whom she's obviously not interested? There's nothing psychologically wrong with being disinterested in marrying someone you don't much like that you didn't choose for yourself. I've met plenty of unhappy women who also thought they were getting, "well educated, nice family." What's missing is the quality of the man himself. Someone who is "well educated, nice family" can still be a bad person, and assuming otherwise has condemned many Indian women to a life of misery.
She should cancel the wedding and do what she likes. 27 isn't even that old. I didn't get married until I was 30.
2007-09-24 20:02:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hey Sweety, if ur fren doesnt want to get married, dont force her. Let her live her life as per her will, I do undertand the fact that her parents are not ready to listen to anything but we can all sit down and talk to them and make them understand what the scenario is like. And most f all, be positive, maybe she had her own reasons for saying no, there is no need to jump to any kind of conclusions, whatever happens, always happens for the good. Jut be cool and very patient with her and try and understand the emotional part of hers so that you can get a more clear picture of why she is reactinng like that. And beleive me, you will see the difference.
2007-09-24 21:06:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. It is not a psychological problem. It is possible that she has realized that this is not the guy for her. Maybe it is really that she is afraid of what will happen. Did her parent stay married? Was their infidelity? She could also just be more interested in her career and herself right now. If she doesn't want to get married, she should tell the guy.
2007-09-25 10:03:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she doesn't really love this guy...then she's NOT doing him any favor by not marrying him. It would be an injustice to him.I would probably never work out. Why in the world would they want her to marry somebody she doesn't love???This is America. Are they from a different country where their customs are different? Does she live with her parents and they want her out of the house? There are better ways of getting out of the house than marriage. Can you imagine having to marry somebody you don't love?
2007-09-24 20:39:58 · answer #4 · answered by Deenie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is a completely independent, well educated woman, who wants her own career, and doesn't sound like she is ready for marriage, and children.
In USA, average woman have children at 35. The age difference does matter, and she sounds like she wants her freedom to establish a career. Very modern of her!
Support her, and keep her as a friend.
You can do nothing but respect her, and her wishes.
Friends don't tell other's what they should or should not do.
(we don't know what their relationship is like behind closed doors!)
Welcome to 2007.
Women rule!
2007-09-24 20:03:48 · answer #5 · answered by Lilly 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think she should call off her engagement. She gets to choose whether she wants to get married. If she doesn't see the point of it, why make her do it? She and her parents are from different generations. She is educated enough to choose, and this is her choice. Everyone should respect it.
2007-09-24 20:55:29 · answer #6 · answered by Katherine W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its her life... let her make her own decision in this otherwise she will be very unhappy.
Sounds to me like the chemistry isnt there for her, and if it isnt she shouldnt get married no matter what people are saying to her.
Do you really want her to suffer in a marraige she clearly does not want?
2007-09-24 20:04:58 · answer #7 · answered by Paramedic Girl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She doesn't need a reason: more and more people are remaining single these days, or cohabiting, without a legally binding contract hanging over them.
2007-09-24 20:16:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋