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So I have been dating my girlfriend for a year and i love her to death. We met at work and i knew who she was because she dated another guy i knew but that is not how we hooked up. After falling for her i had learned that she has been intimate with a few other ppl. Shes gotten with a few past boyfriends and a few random hookups (which i do not like at all). She says she used to be a little heavier and had low self esteem but i just dont think that excuses being an idiot. I get so mad just thinking about some things she did and we fight about it maybe once a month, but its the same argument every time. such as Why did you do all that stuff? How stupid are you? How much attention did you just NEED to have? I truly love this girl and she loves me, but although everyone flirts including myself... her flirty and "too nice" personality has affected her past and my present big time.... what can i do to keep this off my mind. a break-up will not happen

2007-09-24 17:54:20 · 23 answers · asked by dubbs41mw 2 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

23 answers

Actually I think you need to get over it,you are starting to sound just like a female,she told you it was in the past so what you have to do now is have a conversation about where you want to take the relationship to,
You have to realize that if you can't put her past behind you both,there probably is no future.
Good luck

2007-09-24 18:00:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Oh man.....why are you harping on the past? Leave that girl past mistakes alone, if you love her. Everyone has made mistakes, and it really doesn't matter how big or small they are. She can't jump into a time machine and go back to change anything, so pleeeeeease leave it ALONE!!! Besides, weren't these all things that she did BEFORE you two hooked up?
I hate to say this, but this is a problem with you. I have no idea what you should do about it, but it is definitely YOUR issue, not hers.

Maybe you should remind yourself that you love her, and everything that she has ever done has made her the person that she is today...the person you love.
Hopefully (for her sake) that will help.

2007-09-24 18:01:03 · answer #2 · answered by Trisha 2 · 0 0

I know it can be hard to understand, but a girl that has low self-esteem does things like that. I must say, you asking her how stupid are you does not help either. Please bear in mind that at least she was open and honest with you about it all. If she's still being flirty, that needs to stop, but cut her some slack. I'm sure you have a past too and she's not bringing that up.

2007-09-24 18:00:46 · answer #3 · answered by Scarlett12 5 · 0 0

My guy was the same way you are now. You need to back of her. If she is not mistreating you then let it go before she lets you go. If you love her and she loves you then the past should not matter. You should cherish the present time. If she is anything like me which she sounds like then all you are doing is hurting her. She didn't hurt you she wasn't with you when she done those things. If you love her then you will stop hurting her and try to let it go. You asking her how stupid is she does not help at all. All it does is makes her think you think she is stupid and don't care about her as much as you say you do. LET IT GO STOP HURTING HER. If you really love her then hurting her should be you hurting yourself.

2007-09-24 18:04:36 · answer #4 · answered by BWife 2 · 0 0

It's her past. It's really not your place to judge her behavior for things she had done BEFORE,she got with you. If you really love her you would accept her for who she is, and not call her stupid, and an idiot. She probably has low-self esteem from being with jerks like you who put her down. Stop living in the past and get over yourself. It sounds like you have insecurity issues. Ask yourself why her past makes you uncomfortable in a constructive manner instead of making her feel bed.

2007-09-24 18:02:37 · answer #5 · answered by spiffymo 4 · 0 0

If you really loved your girlfriend, you wouldn't say such disrespectful, mean and hurtful things to her. She was honest with you, and her reward for that is to be treated like trash by the guy who says he loves her. You obviously don't see your girlfriend as a human being capable of making mistakes and learning from them. You are looking at your girlfriend like she is an object, a piece of property for you, and you're pissed because your object had a sex life before you. If you want a girl who is a virgin, say so before you get together. If you expect perfection, say so before you get together. Don't punish your girlfriend for not being what you want her to be, love her for who she is, or let her go so that she can be with someone who will not judge her and pretend to love her.

2007-09-24 18:01:30 · answer #6 · answered by Kerry 7 · 0 0

Look just do one thing. Ask your girlfriend that she really loves you or not. If the answer is in yes then tell her that she had to forget everything of her past and you too. Start a new life and forget everything. If she can't do this then just leave her. It is very tough but it will be better option for you.

2007-09-24 18:01:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

u need to let go of the past and not worry about what she did before you. all that matters is that she is with you and only you now so nothing else should matter. if your really really not trying to let it go then you will have more problems in the future by constantly bringing it up so either end the relationship or stay with her accept her past for what it was. DO NOT stay with her and keep bringing up old s. hit! that is the worst thing possible for your relationship

2007-09-24 18:02:10 · answer #8 · answered by So Confused 3 · 0 0

are you severe? you took her virginity and your frightened approximately various the different bases she rounded until now you bought mutually? recover from it have been all human all of us in basic terms stay as quickly as, sexuality is a organic, familiar instincually component to life and it takes experimentation to ascertain what you like and the thank you to thrill the guy who your with. your youthful and there shall be different women on your destiny too, you think of there gonna get disenchanted because you're no longer a saint the two. as properly i do no longer think of that experimenting with kissing and touching etc is a 'grimy previous". you extra useful get a shield on all those jealously and administration themes your showing mutually as your youthful. or your gonna be one hurting unit while your on your 20's and you meet the lady of your desires that still rocks your worldwide in the mattress room. and you come across out that she slept with countless adult men until now you which of them is why she is able to furnish you the perfect intercourse you have ever had. only say thank you to those who've come until now you for helping to domesticate the lady at your area into the solid, desirable, indepedent goddess at your area.. or you're able to attempt turning those grimy photos you preserve picturing into fantasies?

2016-10-19 21:37:38 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

If you loved her, you wouldn't hold her past against her. What she did before you, is really none of your business.

If you can't get over it, you need to break up and let her find a real man, who really cares about her and not about what she did in the past.

2007-09-24 17:57:59 · answer #10 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 1 0

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