Kids at weddings?

Question

My wedding will consist of all of my relatives flying in from another state. I want to invite all my immediate relatives, aunts, uncles, and first cousins. Many of my first cousins are children under 10 years old. That is fine with me since they are my close family members. Is it okay though to invite those children but not to invite children that belong to friends of ours that live in town? Or should I just invite all children? If I did, that would be like 20 kids at my wedding? Is that inappropriate?

Answer 1

I hear you. Due to budget, I decided to draw the line for our guest list at 1st cousins only. That means we are having some kids because they are my first cousins. We are also having my fiance's first cousins but they are all adults but we are not inviting their kids bc they are 2nd cousins. They might be offended since their kids are not invited but I can't help that my 1st cousins are all under 18 and his aren't. It has to be one rule for all.
I think that it is perfectly ok to not invite friends' kids because they aren't family and plus if they live in town, they can get a babysitter with advance notice.
You don't want your wedding over-run with kids running around, it won't turn out to be the nice romantic affair you invisioned.

Answer 2

I would invite all the kids if I were you. I know a lot of people are anti-children at weddings (which I never really understood). The problem you will encounter if you invite some, not all, the kids is hurt feelings. It just isn't worth the headaches to pick and choose this child, but not that one.I had about 16 kids under 12 at my wedding and they were awesome. They added a really fun element to the reception, dancing and enjoying everything. My wedding was a black-tie event and all the kids were very well behaved. Some of the parents chose to not bring their kids, even though they were welcome, but many of them were so happy that their children were included. Usually you can get the kids meals at a steep discount too since they, obviously, won't be drinking any alcohol.

Answer 3

It is too hard for out of towners to find sitters in a city where they are unfamiliar. Also they are family. Friends and acquaintances from the hometown should be able to find a babysitter without a problem. If they are not going to be understanding, then they are not true friends.
Being a mother myself, I would understand the difference. I would think nothing of a friend having a party and not inviting my kids, but family kids belong at a family wedding.
Being a mother, I enjoy being able to get to a wedding or other party kid free, you get to let your hair down and enjoy yourself so much more. A night off so to speak!!! I would feel sorry for the ones that have to bring their kids!!!
Good luck! Have a great wedding

Answer 4

This can be an extremely sore subject for lots of people. Either they agree with it, or they don't. I've been invited to four weddings that were no kid weddings.
The first, was my cousin's wedding. Neither one of my brothers could go because it was an out of town wedding and they couldn't find sitters. i didn't have kids then. Oh yeah, and certain people brought their kids anyway.
The second was my cousin's also. This one i couldn't go to because i had a kid by then, and it was also an out of town wedding (this was the brother of the other wedding.) Oh and I was told people brought their kids to this wedding too.
The third was a friend of mine. We didn't bring our kids. She had her neices there, they were the flowergirls. Whatever, i wouldn't have brought my kids anyway.
The last one was this summer, it was my husband's cousin. It was an out of town wedding and i had to leave my kids with my sister-in-laws friend because everyone else we knew was attending the wedding. I had a terrible time, i was worried about my kids all night. And there were kids there too. Which totally pissed me off.
So anyway, my vote is all or none. Out of town, or in town. it's unfair to invite some kids and not others.
Oh and i think kids complete a wedding. They are the only ones on the dance floor until everyone has had enough to drink, so then you won't feel like you are paying the d.j. for nothing.

Good luck

Answer 5

Absolutely it's all right to invite the children you're related to (and any children on the groom's side as well) and not invite the children of friends that live in town. Look at it from the parents point of view, if they're having to travel from out of town to come to your wedding, they either have to bring their children, or arrange someone to stay with their children. If they bring their children, they are certainly not going to be comfortable leaving their children with a sitter they don't know in a town they don't live in. However, your friends who live in town already have sitters they know of, so it's not a big deal for them to get a sitter for the evening. Just make sure if there are any kids on your fiance's side of the family, that they're invited as well--so as to not ruffle any feathers. But it's absolutely ok to limit invited children to family only.

Answer 6

Invite the kids. If your friends want an adult evening, they'll hire a sitter. Or you could offer to get one for all the kids.

My sis got married in Vegas. I was broke and didn't have money for gambling, so after the wedding & little reception all the nieces & nephews came to my hotel room for pizza, sodas, and movies. We had a big ole' sleepover and everyone had fun. The kids felt important because they were invited and the parents got to go have fun, too.

Answer 7

I AM RIGHT IN THE SAME BOAT WITH YA! But mine is this weekend!!!! We just went ahead and invited all family members down to the little ones.. ;) But we have our way of keeping them in there seats! Have a kids table or two.. we are having arts and crafts so the parents arent having to worry about what they are getting into.. Have a large piece of white paper TONZ of crayons, and print off pages of (wedding pictures) to color!! and sence we are getting married at the baseball stadium.. we have some baby sitters that are going on the field and playing a game or two with the 6-13 ones ( or the ones that arent going to sit there and color for a little while..)!!! It should be less boaring for them!!
ALSO let your d.j put or you put some kids songs on (if you are dancing at your reception) It is so funny what kids can come up with!!!!!!!! We are having about 15-20 I hope!!! ; )

Answer 8

I have to go with the all or nothing on the kids as opposed to family kids can come friends kids can't.
Because many of your relatives have to come from out of state, I think you should include the kids.
You can't expect your relatives to find multi-day sitters so they can fly to your wedding without their kids.
I'm in a similar situation and actually am not booking my first choice in reception places (a museum) because there will be kids attending.

Answer 9

The fact of the matter is, if you invite some kids and others have to leave theirs at home, they will probably be offended that their children were not invited. The decision is entirely up to you, but you have to keep peoples reactions in mind. I would say do whatever you want because it is your big day, but if you don't want to put up with people bitching about their kids I would invite them all.

-Have fun with your wedding!

Answer 10

What is incorrect is a guest list that acts as a public announcement of who you do and don't like or approve of. For example, if family gatherings frequently include your Aunt Betty and her children AND your Aunt Cathy and hers, then you can't invite Betty's well behaved kids and exclude Cathy's hellions. However, if you see Betty's kids frequently and barely know Cathy's -- that is a different story.

There is nothing incorrect about inviting parents and not inviting their children. And there is nothing incorrect about inviting some children and not others. One has a relationship with the children of some friends and barely knows the children of other friends. There is nothing wrong with limiting your guest list to people you actually know and care about without regard to age.