Is it ok to invite a friend and not add ‘guest’ to the invitation?

Question

I really can’t afford a huge wedding, and I was wondering if I were to invite my friends and not include guest on the invite; would this be OK.

For example; “Ms Jane Smith” not “Ms. Jane Smith and Guest.”

Do u think they will know that the invite is only for them and not for a guest? Is this rude? Or can it even be done….they might still bring someone…

Thanks for ur input.

Answer 1

depends on the person. some might get the hint others may not.
just be prepared for people calling and asking you, or for people to just bring someone.

Answer 2

honestly, this is done all the time. some guild-lines to use are.
1. will the guest know other people at the wedding. if yes, then they don't need an "and guest"

and
2. are they in serious relationship. if yes, then you should invite a guest. if not, a single is fine.

before i was with my bf, there were many of wedding that i didn't get to bring a guest. i didn't mind because they were either friends or family so i knew i would not be alone and then i didn't have to worry about finding a date. if you are worried that people will not pick up on the envelope then you can mark 1 on their RSVP. or if someone that responds more then 1, you will have to call and tell them that because of the expense of a wedding space is limited.

Answer 3

I just got married June 3rd of this year and I had the same dilemma. I went onto many wedding sites trying to get an idea of what was ok and what wasn't ok. It turns out that it is totally acceptable to invite your friend only without a guest. If they get offended, you need to just explain to them that you have to pay for each person that comes and you just don't have the money to invite guests that you don't know, but that it would mean the world to you if he/she (your friend) came. If they are a real friend, they will understand. I chose a little method of my own when trying to decide if I should add a guest with someone I planned to invite. If they were in a steady relationship for more than two years, I invited their "guest" but if they weren't really seing anyone serious and they would only invite a "friend" as their guest, I didn't add a guest onto their invitation. Hope this helps.

Answer 4

What we have here is an example of The Wedding Industry creating a fictional "etiquette" that is the exact opposite of what is actually correct. Miss Manners says you don't put "and guest" on an invitation unless you are inviting someone named "Guest." You invite each and every person by name, even children. The only exception is that married, engaged, and ... uh, other ... couples get a joint invitation. If the names don't fit the "Mr & Mrs" format, you put each name on a seperate line. For het couples, the female name goes first.

Because the wedding industry has been so busy perpetuating this reverse un-etiquette nonsense, there will indeed be guests who mistakenly believe that they are entitled to bring guests of their own, to treat some casual friend to a champagne supper at YOUR expense.

The way you make things clear is to do your rsvp-ing the old fashioned way -- by phone. Include a ph# next to or below the 'rsvp' on the invitations. You don't need to handle every call personally; it's fine to have friends and family deal with the calls. There are 3 big advantages to phoned rsvps.

(1) You are in greater control of your guest list. With a printed card it's easy to cross out the "2, 1 or 0 attending?" and write in "5". If people try this over the phone, you will be prepared to say things like "We'd love to meet your out of town guests some other time, but we're only inviting people we know and care about."
(2) You save money. No printing of too cute little cards and no stamps to put on cute little envelopes.
(3) People will ASK what sort of gift you'd like. You already know it's rude to mention gifts on the invitation -- this is your golden opportunity to let people know that you're registered at Macy's and LOVE cash.

Congrats and best wishes.

Added later: If you wish, you can ask some of the singles "Is there someone special you'd like for me to invite?" Then you get a name and send that person an invitation. Consider how much more gracious this is than the "scrounge up some kind of date or you'll look funny" message that "and guest" sends to singles.

Answer 5

It's perfectly acceptable to invite single people without a guest, in which case you would address the invitation as you stated. However, just because you address the invitation that way, doesn't mean people still won't RSVP for more than one. In that case, you'd need to call them and say you're sorry about the misunderstanding, but due to space and cost considerations, you're not able to accomodate a guest. Do be sure to include married couples, engaged couples and couples who have been together more than a year (even if not engaged), but there's no need to provide a guest space for someone who is only casually dating, or will have to rustle up a date to go.

Answer 6

I don't think it's rude at all.

If you can't afford a huge wedding, then only invite that person. Some people might call and see if they can bring a guest if they don't see that on the invite. You can explain it then. It can be possible that someone will bring someone.
But for the most part, they should get the hint.

Other wise spread the word, tell people your not inviting a lot cause you can't afford it, they will understand! All in all this is your wedding and it should be how you want it!

Congrats on your wedding!

Answer 7

No it is perfectly acceptable for them not to have a guest if you can't afford it. They will just have to understand. Besides, they should not expect to bring someone. If they want to help celebrate your marriage then they really won't mind if they can't bring someone. Just make sure you seat them somewhere they can talk to other people. If they bring someone, they will have to be asked to leave unless there is enough food. It would be extremely rude of them to show up with someone who was not invited. If they don't like not being able to bring a guest, the should decline your invitation.

Answer 8

Absolutley, this isn't the Prom. If your guest isn't in a long term relationship, you don't have to invite another guest also. However, if the "guest" would be the only person besides you at the wedding that he or she knows, then i would make an exception and allow them to bring someone. For example, coworkers don't need to bring guests cause they already have other coworkers there to talk too. Use your judgement. It'll be fabulous!!

I marry my sweetie October 20, WooooHooooo!

Answer 9

I think you are quite within your rights to do this. I wouldnt want a heap of strangers at my wedding! It is for you to celebrate with the people you love, not for them to bring freeloaders whom you dont even know.
Just put the one name on the invite. Hopefully they will get the picture. I think most of them will. YOu might get one or two who still think they can bring a guest....you should get an idea when they RSVP. If someone still thinks they can bring a guest you either tell them when they RSVP, that you would prefer they didnt, or you grin and bear it. At least you will thin out most of the "guests" because I think most people with a brain will get the idea. But there will always be one or two that will have a thick skin and not realise. Good luck

Answer 10

If you don't let some friends have a guest and others not have guests it's entirely fine. Unless they don't know anything about formal invitation they'll know that a guest is not invited unless otherwise specified.

You may want to consider allowing a guest for friends of yours who are engaged and of course both of the couple if married.

Answer 11

I think that it is totally acceptable. However, if your friend is in a serious relationship, engaged, married, or been together for several years, those people will probably assume that they can bring their significant other. If you are not wanting their spouse or boyfriend to come it would be best not to invite that particular friend at all. They may be offended that they cant bring their husband/boyfriend, (I would in such case). If they aren't offended they may opt against attending. I would not attend any social affair if I could not go with my husband, and vise-versa. If they are single, by all means address to guest only.
Hope this helps.