My daughter is 16 months old and has always slept with us. I am trying to get her in her own toddler bed. She sleeps in her toddler bed in our room for a coupld of hours then she gets up and want in bed with us and we let her. How do we get her to sleep all night in her bed and when should we move her out of our bedroom and put her in hers?
2007-09-24 08:25:03 · 25 answers · asked by TTC#2 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Thats way to long of a time. She should already be sleeping on her own in her own room. Thats what baby monitors are for. Put her in the room and let her cry it out, do not get up, do not give in, she will TEST you. It will get worse before it gets better.
Edit: I can't believe how many people on this site let their kids dictate the sleeping arrangements. You must never have "adult time" with your spouse? How do you manage this with a child in your bed at night?
2007-09-24 08:30:35 · answer #1 · answered by danzahn 5 · 2⤊ 5⤋
I think letting your daughter sleep with you is just fine, for as long as it works for all of you. If you want to change now just remember that patience and consistency is the key. Start slowly. First get her to sleep in her bed the whole night in your room. When she climbs in bed with you just get up and put her back into her bed, rub her back, give her a kiss on the forehead, whatever it takes to soothe her a bit, (although best to avoid talking) and go back to your bed. Be prepared to do this all night long and for some crying. Just remember she won't hold it against you in the morning, there will be no psychological scars lol, it will only be you feeling guilty. Once you have conquered having her sleep in her own bed then move the bed to her room and be prepared for the same thing, bringing her back to bed many many many times during the night. Do not give in; always bring her back to her bed. If you stick with it you will be surprised to find that within a few days she will give up trying to sleep with you. Keep in mind the first two or three nights will be very difficult for both of you so best to start on a long weekend or at a time when you know you will survive the next day if you don't sleep much. Good luck.
2007-09-25 12:18:08 · answer #2 · answered by Lori D 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really do not understand all of the negativity towards co-sleeping. Over half of the world's population co-sleeps without any problems!
I believe a baby should be in the parents room until they are AT LEAST 6 months old (even then it seems premature to put them in their own room). 6 months is when SIDS declines. By having a baby close to a parent, the parent helps regulate the babies breathing, something a baby monitor cannot do. It also helps establish a strong nursing relationship between mother and baby. Beyond that point, I do not think their is anything wrong with a young child sleeping in their parents room. I also do not think their is an age limit as to what is appropriate or not. Most co-sleeping children naturally want to be in their own bed by the time they are school aged, if not earlier.
I think you are doing a GREAT job! If you are wanting her to sleep all night in her bed, I would allow her to get in bed with you when she wakes and when she drifts back to sleep, put her back into her toddler bed. She will eventually start sleeping for longer periods of time in her toddler bed. This is what I did with my son. Most nights he sleeps all night. Some nights he loves his room, some nights he wants to be in our bed. In my opinion, he is little and needs that extra comfort. If we are all sleeping it really does not matter what the sleeping arrangement is.
If you want her in her own room, slowly allow a transition from your room to hers. Let her sleep through the night first, and then work on moving her bed into her room. You can move her bed farther and farther away from yours until one night it is in her room. You can also try to decorate her room up for her to get her excited about her room.
I hope this helps and good luck to you and your little one!
2007-09-25 00:02:39 · answer #3 · answered by jns 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say it but remember this next time you have a baby. I never slept with either of mine but had them in the same room with me until they were 6 - 8 weeks old. Then in the crib they went with a monitor. The first one was sleeping 12 straight hours a night at 4 months. The second sleeps 10 straight hours at 6 months. Good habits are worth it from the beginning. I realize you do sleep less the first couple of months going into another room to check on your baby BUT it is well worth it in the end.
I have a friend whose 15 year old daughter still crawls in bed with them every single night. Yikes!
Watch supernanny or get the book (from your library even). She is very detailed on how to get out of your situation!
Good luck - it will be hard but the reward will be great. Perhaps as a first move you could move the toddler bed to your room. You could even try a crib in your room so she can't just hop out.
2007-09-24 22:24:09 · answer #4 · answered by ADC 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I don't think there is a set age for when it is time for them to sleep in there own bed. My daughter turned 2 in July and still sleeps with us and we have just started to move her out. You are doing the right thing by starting her off in a toddler bed and then letting her climb into bed with you. Eventually she will sleep in her bed for longer stretchs of time and then through the night. Once she does that you can start moving the bed slowly out of the room and into her bedroom. It won't happen over night, it will take time. We have been working on this for a few weeks and last night was the first night she slept in her bed till around 5:30 where as before it has always been around midnight. Just take it slow and let them get used to small changes at a time, toddlers are very senstive to routines and some just don't handle drastic changes, like moving from sleeping in Mommy and Daddy's bed to their own in another room well.
Also, the entire side of my husbands family (he is the youngest of 6) pratices/practiced extended breastfeeding and the family bed and out the 16 kids none of them have still been sleeping in the bed when the are old enough to ask for a remote. The only one left in the same bed is my duaghter who is 2 (all the other range in age from 4-22). They do leave eventually and they will let you know when they are ready.
2007-09-24 15:37:25 · answer #5 · answered by Lanie7/21 3 · 4⤊ 3⤋
There's a lot of different schools of thought on this. I personally think there is no harm in having your child sleep with you as long as you are comfortable with it. My daughter slept with us until she was two and had no problems adjusting when we moved her into her own room. It just takes time, and consistency. I like that you have the toddler bed in your room to start, and what I would do is continue put her back into her own bed when she gets up. Eventually she will get used to it, and then you can move the bed to the her own room. Just be patient, she will get there! And don't listen to people who give you a hard time for letting her sleep with you in the first place, the "family bed" has been gaining in popularity over the years and there are plenty of people who don't mind their kids sleeping with them. You've done nothing "wrong" here.
2007-09-24 15:36:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 3⤋
You should have thought your baby to sleep in its own bed the day you brought her home. What you can do is once she comes back to your bed let her know that you are there and that she needs to sleep in her own bed. And put her back into her own bed. Little by little she will get it and then proceed to moving her to her own room and stay there with the lights off and re-assure her that you are there until she falls asleep. And if she comes back just do the same thing, it will take some time and some missed nights of sleep but soon she will be sound asleep in her own room in her own bed.
2007-09-24 15:33:26 · answer #7 · answered by hotgyrl29 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
It's definitely time for her to be sleeping in her own room. You need to move her bed into her room. She may come to your room for a while, but when she does take her back to her room. Eventually she will stop coming to your room and learn to sleep through the night in hers.
2007-09-25 00:16:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Please ignore all the people fussing at you for having your child sleep with you in the first place. That is a personal decision. My husband and I had our son sleep with us, despite our family fussing, and relished having that extra cuddle time in our day. And it helped our son be independent and learned that we would be there to comfort him. At two we redid his bedroom and made it a big deal that he was getting a big boy room, even with a race car bed! He was so in love with it all that he put himself in his new room. There were still nights he would come to our room, but we would lead him back to his and rub him and pat him till he was drifting off. There will come a point when you need to take her back to her room and leave without the extra comforts, but that can be when you feel she is comfortable enough to stay there. So about 2 is good, but do it when you feel your child can understand the concept of "her" room, and that you are right across the hall if she needs you.
2007-09-24 15:43:32 · answer #9 · answered by Pamela B 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
My three year old was in his room between 3-5 months and my youngest who is 8 months was sharing the bedroom by the time he was 3 months.
Not saying the oldest one never tries to come into our bed but he has been in his room for awhile
2007-09-24 15:42:52 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋