I was invited for lunch by a friend of mine and the moment we sat down, she opened her handbag to get her cellphone out and placed it on the table. An hour later, we still haven't ordered anything to eat or drink, and we haven't spoken at all. Why? She was busy sending text messages and answering her phone calls. If it would have been for business I would understand it, but it was all private.
Was it wrong, when I told her she has bad manners and she never needs to invite me for lunch ever again?
2007-09-24 01:39:00 · 20 answers · asked by Carpe Diem 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Thanks for making me feel better. I just want to add: I actually had no time to go on lunch with her, I was swamped with work and still, after pesting me for three days I said yes after all. So don't go on telling me I shouldn't have to act so rude.
2007-09-24 01:57:15 · update #1
I'm a Taurus, what can I say. Takes a while to p*** me off, but when the deed is done, nothing stops me. (Which isn't ettiquete either, I know). That's the reason why I waited so long before I said something.
2007-09-24 02:34:08 · update #2
It might have been better to say something like "I was looking forward to lunch with you but it was annoying and hurt me that you spent all of your time on your cell phone." This would have probably gotten the point across better that saying that she shouldn't invite you for lunch again.
2007-09-24 01:47:30 · answer #1 · answered by Pirate AM™ 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Wow - you have an amazing amount of patience and frankly, so did the wait staff, because if you were there an hour and had not ordered yet, you were tying up a table and if it's during the busy lunch hour they probably would have liked to have a quicker turn time.
After 5 minutes or so I would have asked her if she was about finished so we could order because you were on a really tight schedule and if this wasn't a good time because of the "pressing" matters she was having to take care of then maybe you should reschedule lunch for another time......it would have given her the "hint" she was being rude. And if it didn't, well, there is no helping that kind of person.
2007-09-24 09:55:46 · answer #2 · answered by jkc 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not at all. Your friend was rude and needs to learn some basic social skills! You were there to talk to her, and she was basically saying "I have more important things to do, more important people to talk to than you. You are not my top priority". If her phone rang and she just said to the caller "could I cal you back in an hour? I'm out to lunch" that would be perfectly acceptable. But to have a conversation with someone else when you are right there is just plain rude.
Don't rule out meeting for lunch some time, but make sure she apologises first.
2007-09-24 08:53:55 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your annoyance was appropriate, but you might have handled it better. Perhaps, after 10 minutes or so, you could say, "I see that you're busy with your phone and I have limited time for a lunch break; so I'll go and let you attend your business. We'll talk later." Then smile and leave. Naturally, you'd never haver time to meet her for lunch again.
2007-09-24 09:21:44 · answer #4 · answered by lfh1213 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you were wrong to let your "friend" know that you were very irritated by her rude behavior. She needs to be aware of her actions. That's one of my pet peeves when people do that. My boyfriend did that this weekend. We went apple picking with my family and he was texting periodically throughout the day. He doesn't do it all the time, but I just thought it was rude. It made me feel like we weren't entertaining enough for him so he had to communicate with his friends. I should have said something about it, but I opted to avoid a fight. The more I think about it now, the more irritated I get.
2007-09-24 09:53:49 · answer #5 · answered by Not quite perfect 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
that was so irritating. You should have picked her phone and throw it out of the window then left her alone!
Cellphones are necessity these days especially if you have business, but these should be used properly and with ethics. It is disappointing that many people, young and old, treat these gadgets as their second self, as if they can't leave without them.
next time, if someone does this again, tell pointblank that she/he has bad manners. she/he doesn't know how to use the phone.
2007-09-24 08:53:39 · answer #6 · answered by singlemomof2sons 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
that is so rude. i dont understand these ppl. they're like slaves to the hp. what could possibly happen if they ignore the sms over a lunch period? if its something urgent, the hp wouldve been ringing non-stop already. besides, it really makes the company feel unimportant.
u said that to her because she really tested ur patience.
hope she learnt a lesson there.
2007-09-24 11:45:09 · answer #7 · answered by miss understand 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
For sure its fine to be honest to tell her she behaved badly! Its her choice and realization of how she wants to behave over the next time she invites you, should you accept her invitation. Probably teh next time if she does invite you , you wud be able to find out if she is sorrry for her behaviour or not and accordingly accept or decline. Dont make haste and tell her not to invite you anymore!:)
2007-09-24 09:59:15 · answer #8 · answered by smart_an 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lend her a copy of 'Etiquette for Dummies' by Sue Fox. Then tell her to immediately flip page 124 (Communicating with Care: Cellphones)
2007-09-24 08:52:48 · answer #9 · answered by go~ness! 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Not wrong at all, if anything, she should have turned the thing OFF. This was a pre-arranged time to talk specifically to you.
If this goes any further, tell her (for me) "if you don't want to share time with me, don't ask me out".
Well done.
2007-09-24 11:12:24 · answer #10 · answered by Pacifica 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋