My 4.5 yr old bit someone in class. I am shocked? what do i do?

Question

My son has a very calm personality. He is not very aggressive. But given that he is smaller in size compared to his other classmates- he does often complains that others push him around. But overall i think he still tries and gets along with others. But last weel the Teacher called us and complained abt that "he bit someone in the class".
When asked he said that big kid was sitting on his mat and since he refused to get up- he bit him.
1) What should i tell him?
2) What should i tell the teacher?
3) What should i tell him- this way he can protect himself and not come out as a black sheep in the group or class?
4) How should i help him to deal with his anger and frustration?

Please could u answer all 4 questions seperately
thank you

Answer 1

I teach this level and let me tell you that your son is not the first to bite.
1) What should you tell him? Tell him that he needs to use words not action when he is frustrated with someone. Tell him it's ok to get help from a grown up if his words are not helping.
2)What should you tell the teacher? Tell her that you will address this with your little one and that biting is not a way you want your child to deal with his problems.
3) He can definitely protect himself without biting. Walk away, talk it out is a much more affective way to solve a problem. Your teaching him to solve problems and deal with conflict instead of being aggressive or violent.
4) Tell him it is ok to get frustrated we all do but how we act on that frustration is the important part. Take a time out if you have to, walk away from the situation or talk to a grown up and ask for help with a situation.
I know he is only 4.5 but he really does have to learn to deal with situations and it's never too early to start. It's a skill he will use for the rest of his life and that's why we don't see business men biting each other in boardrooms or slugging it out. (at least not on a regular basis!)

Answer 2

1) You should tell him biting is not nice, and it hurts. Tell him that someday, someone might bite him back, and to remember that before he does it again.

2) Tell the teacher that you haven't observed this kind of behavior at home, so you're not sure what to do. Ask for her advice. You don't need to be embarassed or anything by his behavior - kids act out all the time. The only thing to feel bad about is if you don't do anything to correct the behavior - which you certainly seem to be trying to correct it right away.

3/4) Tell your son to use his words and not his body - that is, to tell his classmates he's angry with them, rather than lashing out physically. It's hard to get picked on, and something you will probably have to work with him on throughout school. I feel that a child should be taught to use physical force as a last resort, but to feel comfortable doing so. Perhaps you should sign your son up for karate or self defense. The physical activity is an excellent way to expend energy, and he will learn to defend himself (not to start a fight but to protect himself should he be physically bullied).

Good luck!

Answer 3

1. Tell him its not nice to bite, dont do it again.
2. Apoligize to the teacher
3. Tell him if he has a problem go to the teacher for help.
4. Its understandable why he was frustrated, the kid sitting on his mat probably figured he could treat your son like that cuz hes bigger, quite frankly he deserved the bite.

Answer 4

tell him that biting is not nice, and it hurts, so everytime he bites someone, he is going to "get a taste of his own medicine".

Tell him, that everytime he bites someone, he will be spanked so he can feel how the other person feels.

Then FOLLOW THROUGH CONSISTENTLY!

Every single time he bites, follow through with your promise and give him a hard spank on the bottom. Eventually he will get the message that it is not okay to bite people, and that:
causing others pain=causing him pain

My younger brother used to have a problem with biting when he was around that age. My mom and dad told him that each time he bit someone, he'd get a little bite from them, and a spanking so he'd know how it felt.

it just took a couple times of my parents following through with their word, and biting/spanking him back, before he realized and stopped biting.

Answer 5

you wait til monday when hes back in school and likely to do it again to ask what to do. oh come on now get serious. a real parent would have known how to answer this. you need to sit your son down and make him understand violence is not the answer. he doesnt need to protect him self hes four and so is his class mates good job raising a bully

1. violence solves nothing. teach your child to go tell the teacher when someone is harassing him or taking his things

2 you say nothing to the teacher other than i am correctingand redirecting this behavior at school

3. he doesnt need to defend himself he needs to learn to go tell the teacher. your currently raising and asking how to enncourage him to bully

4 counseling and i highly doubt a 4 year old is angry or frustrated

Answer 6

1) dont bite again or you will chop the head of his teddy bear.
2)that him/her that punish both your son and the other boy
3) practise karate and become a bully
4)get anger managemnet courses and count 1-10

Answer 7

I answered a question about biting once and it was a true life experience and what I did to stop it and someone reported it and I got a violation. stupid people grrrr

Answer 8

you have nothing to worry about it's normal. Do what i did with my son; put your feet up, open a beer and watch the Raiders game. People have 2 parents so that one can do all the work and the other can chill. I'm gonna get me a beer now...

Answer 9

Take him to the dentist and remove his teeth and have his jaw wired shut. That should do it.