My ONLY friend of 4 yrs. is bisexual. I'm heterosexual. Most guys don't like me, & people think I should never have kids because they think I'm too retarded & can't take good care of a kid. I'm a nice person, but my social interactions with people aren't that great. Since people feel like I shouldn't have kids & because she can't have kids because of fertility problems, she thinks we should become closer than friends & date, but I don't like that idea. It does seem like she's the only one who cares about me & we get along great. Sometimes she jokingly touches me or tries to kiss me, & I don't feel comfy with that. It seems like I'm so ugly I'll never find a boyfriend, & too many people played with my mind & hurt me. I always fantasize about my friend being a guy. & I tell her all the time how I wish she was a guy b/c she'd be the PERFECT MAN for me because of looks & personality. She probably wouldn't do this but I'm afraid that if I don't give in & date her, she'll dump my friendship.
2007-09-23 19:37:16 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Hello Candy, sounds to me like your friend will like you no matter what. Actually it sounds a little like she's infatuated with you. I'm not sure what you mean by your comment of being "too retarded" (weather or not you are mentally challenged). People with disabilities are by all means capable of having successful families.
You need to be honest with your friend and tell her straight out how you feel. Otherwise if you let things go too far she might end up feeling very hurt and embarrassed by her actions. And don't listen to what others say about you having children of your own, follow your heart. As for boys there is NO such thing as the perfect man, just wait I'm sure your young enough, and if your patient enough a great guy suited just for you will come along.
2007-09-23 19:57:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hi, this might not help ,but I have a sister that is bisexual. She was married for 13 yrs and her old man invited a {female}co-worker over for supper. He had plans of a 3 way but it turns out my sister left him and is now living with her new girlfriend. She said she has never been happier,she told me she gets hit on more now then ever before/by both male and female.My sister tells me that she can pick who she wants to be with,but it is her choice. As far as not being the prettiest girl at the party , looks are not the only thing that makes a women pretty.
2007-09-24 02:55:58 · answer #2 · answered by Hillbilly 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I see the pic of you. Who says your ugly??? Your a very nice beautiful girl.Anybody that tells you that you are retarded or ugly or are not worthy of having kids is not your friend!!! You certainly do not have to resort to a lesbian relationship if you are not a lesbian. I wonder just how much of this stuff has been told to you by the girl who wants to date you. Don't you dare give up on yourself like that!! I don't think a real friend would try to pressure you into anything that makes you uncomfortable! You can email me if you need to talk to someone who isn't trying to get something out of you. Love yourself, it will pay off.
2007-09-24 02:49:50 · answer #3 · answered by claire r 2 · 8⤊ 0⤋
I don't get it. If the fact that she is a woman is the only thing stopping you from dating her, why not just go ahead and date her? Is it social approval? Love is more important. Is it the sex? There are lots of straight couples with sexual problems that they have to work around who manage to have perfectly fulfilling sex lives. Is it your social conditioning? If so, go against it!
Most people are more bisexual than they're willing to admit.
2007-09-24 12:44:47 · answer #4 · answered by GirlInside 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
GIRL! It is painfully apparent that you have some serious problems with self esteem. You should really try to feel better about yourself. Anyway, in regards to your question, you should tell her that you really like your friendship with her and you don't want to risk losing it. That way, her feelings will be spared and you will still have your friend.
You aren't ugly, you deserve to have children, there is nothing wrong with you and anyone who says otherwise is full of crap! Don't put yourself down anymore, you don't deserve to be treated poorly by anyone, especially yourself.
Well.. that's about all I can think of. I hope things turn out well for you, take care! *hug*
2007-09-24 02:48:45 · answer #5 · answered by Chris 4 · 8⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me like your self esteem is extremely low..I think you should seek a counselor very quick...I've been there before when I was younger...Don't let anyone define you...You have to focus on you and let go of the people that put you down...You are considering your friend because you don't feel liked by other people..You gotta seek some help...
2007-09-24 03:16:27 · answer #6 · answered by sistapoetry 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No you shouldn't date her, she deserves someone that feels the same way about her. By the way, I am sure you will find a guy that will see you for the great person you are. Never settle for someone because you think you have no other options!
2007-09-24 02:48:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 8⤊ 0⤋
u can get a boyfriend
one day u can have kids
stop usin excuses and don't let ur friend manipulate u into something u really aren't
she's bi
u are NOT
branch out FAST an make NEW FRIENDS
ur waaaaaay too nice girl! u need acceptence,self-respect from u yourself
join a church and even get counseling u could use cheering up that you deserve and r worthy of!!
2007-09-24 02:45:22 · answer #8 · answered by Yvonne 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋
if she dumps your friendship cous you wont date her than she is no friend at all and if you arent gay than dont date her you will just be misserabal what other ppl think of you is not impotant its what you think of your self that matters take it from someone who knows
2007-09-24 03:06:24 · answer #9 · answered by tommy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry you weren't blessed with the gift of socializing, but not everyone is good at that.
And PLEASE, PLEASE don't date her because you've grown tired of the single life and you want to be loved.
She's bi, you're not, so check out a dating site or something!
Lots of hugs and love,
Adrian, the Y/As straight-forward and strict educator
2007-09-24 02:53:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 0⤋