When somebody else has a problem, I'm always trying to feel compassionate, but I can't. I'm always looking at myself in the mirror. I imagine lots of interviews by reporters and other people about my life. And I'm not even very confident.
2007-09-23 15:01:16 · 22 answers · asked by omygosh 4 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
So how do I build up self confidence?
2007-09-23 15:07:14 · update #1
You can't rid of selifishness nor vanity within you completely. All one can do is not let it consume oneself to the point of absurdity. Realize that there will always be room for improvement in one area of your character or another. (The mere fact that you even posted such a question and even admitted a lack of confidence highlights such a perceived flaw in your own personality.)
As for your indifference towards others' feelings, it's understandable in some instances. At times, it's not always wise to get involved in issues that have little or nothing to do with you directly. In actuality, feigning compassion can have a more negative effect on another person than indifference alone. Sometimes, just letting others sort out their issues on their own without undue interference can be "compassionate." You, in a sense, help others help themselves.
2007-09-23 15:19:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
It might help to realize that you are not the only one who sees your selfishness and vanity, which is probably WHY you lack the confidence you wish you had. Selfish and vain people repel rather than attract others. If serving yourself is your primary goal, then prepare to live a very lonely life. Almost everyone who knows you knows you are pathetically self-centered, and therefore virtually useless as a friend to anyone but yourself. You might never learn to care for or about anyone else, and as a result may never feel the joy of seeing someone benefit from their relationship with you. If you think it might be worth a shot, find someone, even an animal, that you might be able to aid in some way, and then focus all your energy on helping that person or animal succeed, no matter how long it takes! It is a difficult, but worthwhile journey, believe me.
2007-09-23 15:17:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
At least you are now aware of it, that's the first step. I was very spoiled and thought I was vain. But had little self esteem. I had to discover through inventory of my self to discover these things about the true me. That was the first step. Now, I'm into helping other people and try to work at being independent and not getting my way all the time. I'm happy I'm changing to a better person.
All this was through the help of God who told me I would not be happy unless I changed.
2007-09-23 15:10:02 · answer #3 · answered by mary 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That's the problem. Vain people lack confidence. They are obsessed with themselfs, as a cover for that. Just like most homophobes are gay themselfs (or have gay tendencies). Build up your self confidence, and you'll care more about other people and stop putting up your "wall".
2007-09-23 15:05:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to grow up alittle bit and realize that your not the only one on earth. Try helping someone sometime. It just might make you feel good and someday, you may need help, but no one will be there because of the way you are. Think about it!
2007-09-23 15:11:45 · answer #5 · answered by pebbles 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
By remembering that it is no sin to love and like yourself.
Grow up, become the best all round good guy, look out for number one, and then when you have more than enough, you can afford to help others less fortunate than you.
2007-09-25 12:02:13 · answer #6 · answered by flugelberry 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just stop... Try and see how the other person is feeling, what made them that way.. there is a reason for everything..
Think as if your in someone elses shoes, and think about that person and how they are feeling for more than 10 seconds, really think about it.
2007-09-23 15:04:57 · answer #7 · answered by rockgirlfury 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You're in High School, for chrissakes! You're supposed to be vain and selfish...sheesh!
Save all the goody-two-shoes stuff for your college years...those will be the last years you'll believe you can save the world...
Wait til you're in your 30's to start becoming "angelic" like...by then...you'll need that kind of Karma...(you're twenties should be spent having a good time and starting your career way too late...stick with the program, girl...it's way too early in your life for you to become a good person...
2007-09-23 15:07:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Volunteer at a nursing home. When you see the frail lives there, and then learn stuff about there lives when they were young, it is a most humbling experience.
2007-09-23 15:13:09 · answer #9 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You must learn compassion, self adoration is a selfish deed, learn to love others as you love yourself. Try to place yourself in their shoes as you ignore them to admire yourself, how would you feel if that were you/? Vanity unto itself is a humanistic and evil deed, learn compassion, learn to serve others with love and sincerity, physical beauty fades but true inner beauty lasts forever my dear. Learn to live for that
2007-09-23 15:20:36 · answer #10 · answered by caminolargo76 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋