How many people who are married or in long-term relationships...?

Question

Can honestly say they are never attracted to other people?

I don't mean you would cheat on your partners. I just mean that sometimes you see someone and they catch your eye and you think they look nice or yummy, fit whatever word you choose.

Is it not nice when someone flirts a bit with you, does it honestly not make you feel good about yourself.. just a little bit.

Isn't it just natural? So why do so few couples talk about it or get upset about it?

Answer 1

It's very natural. In fact I would say its healthy and good for your self-esteem. You just have to know where to stop.

Answer 2

It is very normal and natural. I think that just because you're in a relationship, doesn't mean that you don't want a little moment of "fantasy". Flirting can be fun sometimes as long as you know your limitations and stay within them. I personally don't say anything to another man that I wouldn't want him to find out about, because them you've crossed the line.
I think that couples with a good relationship can talk about these things.

Answer 3

Do you mean so few or so many?

Personally if another woman checks out my man it makes me feel good too because he is with me and not them. He chose me. If someone checks me out I feel good also, kinda like "I still got it" lol. But although he may get a little over possive when someone actually comes over and flirts witih me, but if they just check me out he tends to put his arm around my waist and kind smile like 'yeah...she's with me" type thing.
But yes I think that it is natrual to find someone other than your partner attractive. Not cheating on them, just looking is natrrual...it isn't even like you are looking for a replacement, you just see someone that catches your eye. My dad always says "I can look at the menu I just can't order"

Answer 4

Just because I am on a diet, it does not mean that I can not look at the menu!

I have been attracted to many women, and some have made it clear that they are attracted to me! My wife has friends that tell her that she is lucky to have me. (I do not see that, I consider myself the lucky one)

There is a difference between being attracted to someone and acting on that attraction! I can look, she can look! When people try to deny the natural attraction exists, they have to hide a portion of themselves from their partner! It is better if you can trust the other.

Answer 5

Well, the thing to remember is that different people have very different feelings about this and whatever works for the couple is what's most important.

As much as many people feel it is natural or healthy for flirting/checking out other people, some people may not think it is, some people may feel that even looking is a path they dont want to go down, some people may be okay with it happening, but dont want to hear about it.

I'm actually curious as to why youre asking - such as is this a problem you and your wife have, or are you single and like to flirt with married, women, etc. I promise Im not passing judgment, Im just curious. If it is you and your other/wife, I would suggest you do talk about it and if you dont agree, try to meet somewhere in the middle. As much as you may feel its perfectly okay, if she doesnt, you dont want to hurt her feelings every time you turn around. If you talk about it, then you have at least established you feel and you can work from there.

If you are asking because of other people's responses (particularly if it is to you flirting or what-not), just be sensitive to the fact that not all couples feel that its okay. I know some perfectly secure, healthy women that would be very offended by someone flirting with them if they knew they were married; I know others who love to flirt. And it may depend upon the level of flirting - flirting is one thing, but hitting on someone when you/they are married is something else.

I see guys that I think are attractive, but I dont think of them as sexy...theres a fine line there I dont want to cross, so Ive made up my mind on how to see them and it works well for me. My fiancee and I both pretty much work like that - we try to limit our attention to others (especially in front of each other), but we dont get mad that the other finds other people attractive. But we dont need to voice it every time it happens.

Answer 6

This is one issue my husband and I agree upon. We appreciate other people's physical beauty. If he sees a chick with a nice butt and boobs, please believe he is saying something to me about it. And I"ll look too because really what does looking hurt? If I see a nice looking man I'll tell him. We're very open and honest about everything so something like this is nothing. But flirting is off limits. Especially while we're together. Eye contact is different but verbally saying something will get him slapped.

Answer 7

Of course people are attracted to other people but it should stop there. Flirting a bit is one thing but excessive is another.
Looking is one thing, it is natural but blatant staring is another. It is disrespectful to the partner.

Answer 8

There is a simple concept that the loss of interest in other women in general will result in a loss of interest in your wife as well.

Flirting, among other things is a nice form of flattery.
It does not mean that you will be together in the rack soon.

Answer 9

I agree with you, the attention is nice, but I honestly get angry when this occurs with my husband I do get upset as he never knows when enough is enough, yet if it happens with me, it's wrong.