My mom is coming with me for my first pelvic exam. When the doctor examines me will he know if I am not a virgin and will he say anything to my mom? My mom said the Dr will sit between my legs but where will my mom be?
2007-09-22 20:56:36 · 11 answers · asked by Ruby H 1 in Health ➔ Women's Health
No and no. You don't even have to have your mother in the room if you don't want, in fact the doctor will probably ask your mother to leave unless you want here there.
The doctor can't tell if you're a virgin or not. They can tell if your hymen is intact or not, but that doesn't prove anything. I heard they can sometimes also tell if there's been recent rough intercourse, or if there's semen inside, but that's not what they'll be looking for in a normal pelvic exam so that shouldn't be an issue. If you have STIs then that's a pretty good sign you've been engaging in some type of sexual activity though.
Your doctor will ask if you are sexually active or not and it is important you tell them the truth. Most doctors realise teenage girls might not want their mothers to know and won't ask with the mother present.
They also will not tell your mother, it is a breach of doctor-patient confidentiality even if you're a minor. (Depends where you live, but that's the law in most places.)
2007-09-22 22:18:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The doctor can tell if your hymen is broken, but won't know if you broke it through sex or if broke through some other activity, like horseback riding. However, you should have a frank conversation with the doctor about birth control and avoiding STD's. Call the office in advance and ask if, when your mom brings you in, if you can see the doctor in private. The nurses will understand and will tell your mom that she needs to stay in the waiting room, and that a nurse will stay with you while you're being examined (which is standard practice anyway with a male doctor). Your mom would normally be in the room if you're young enough, but if you make the request in advance, they will tell you if they can keep her in the waiting room. When your mom says the doctor will "sit between your legs" what she means is that you will be on a table, with your feet in stirrups (like on a horse but lying down), and that he will examine you with a speculum. A speculum is a way of looking in your vagina. He will probably sit on a stool so he can see -- which is what your mom meant. He will put a cotton swab in there and touch the inner walls with it, which feels a little weird: that's for a test called a Pap Smear, which will tell if you have an STD. He will explain what he is doing so you understand. If you didn't use protection when you had sex, like a condom, you may already have gotten an STD. He may not be able to see anything wrong, but the tests will come back and tell. Maybe it's time to tell your mom you're having sex?
2007-09-23 04:06:43 · answer #2 · answered by Katherine W 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Your doctor will not know whether you are a virgin or not unless he/she asks if you are sexually active (and even then that would be done at another time). They can't tell your mom about your status as to whether you are a virgin or not.
The reason that the doctor will not know whether you are a virgin or not unless they ask about whether you are sexually active or not is because the hymen can break for different reasons. Also, some women are born without a hymen.
As for where your mom will sit, it will be in a chair in another part of the room or a chair by your head.
My mom was with me when I had my first pelvic exam at 18 and I'm glad she was there.
Also, whether the doctor is male or female they will have an assistant in there to help with getting the instruments as is needed.
2007-09-23 06:05:15 · answer #3 · answered by sokokl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You Mom will be beside you, but if the doctor is a male, there should be another female present, the nurse, and she will be between your mom and the doctor, to watch that the doctor doesn't do anything he's not suppose to either than to examine you. He'll ask you if you've been sexually active, 9 times out of 10 doctor's won't perform a pelvic exam if you haven't.
Good Luck
2007-09-23 04:05:42 · answer #4 · answered by Musqua 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I can almost guarantee your mother will not be present during a pelvic exam! That's private! She will be in the waiting room. The doctor will see that your hymen (a piece of skin that partially covers your vagina) is broken, but there are lots of ways that could have happened other than sex. He can not tell your mom if you don't want him to. There is a thing called doctor-patient confidentiality. Ask him if he will honor it (by law, he has to!). At this point, you need to speak to him frankly about STDs, safe sex, and birth control. Please, it's too important not to!
I would rather you come clean with your mom, and/or not engage in sexual activity under you are older. However, your question is will he tell your mom? NO! He isn't allowed to by law. If he did, you could sue him, and he would lose his medical license. Besides, it would be unethical. Get educated about STDs and birth control, so you don't get a disease or pregnant. Then you would have no choice but to tell your mom! Good luck!
2007-09-23 04:30:41 · answer #5 · answered by baymast13 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
They will be able to tell if your hymen was broken or if you've had sex recently. SO, if you are sexually active, DO NOT have sex for the few days before your pelvic exam (you shouldn't have sex prior to an exam anyway as it may mess with the results of your pap).
If you want your mom to wait in the waiting room just ask her to wait there. Then you can tell the doctor that you ARE sexually active when they ask you about your sexual history (you should always be honest with your doctor, so TELL THEM you are sexually active).
2007-09-23 04:55:33 · answer #6 · answered by Terri 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
UNDER THE HIPAA ACT OF 1996 he is not suppose to tell your mom.
plus he will not ask if you are sexually active in front of your mom. at least most doctor are smart enough to know that the answer would not be the truth all the time if they did.
Most likely the nurse will ask that with out your mom there when she does your temperature, weight and blood pressure before the doctor examines you.
if you tell him or her your sexually active expect a speech on taking proper protection. ect ect
2007-09-23 05:28:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, the Dr. can tell. Whether your mom finds out or not, I couldn't tell you. Your mom, I would think, would be beside you and not standing behind the Dr.
If you are worried about your mom finding out that you aren't a virgin, she would find that out about you sooner or later. Maybe you shouldn't be having sex. If you are embarrassed or ashamed about not being a virgin then I would say that you have some regret about it.
Have you considered just being upfront with your mom? If you are really worried about her finding out, I can almost guarantee you that she will appreciate it more coming from you instead of the Dr.
2007-09-23 04:07:07 · answer #8 · answered by larithd 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
normally ur mother should be in the waiting room and the doctor cannot tell here that. all information are private between doctor and pacient. anyway if u don't want ur mother there tell her ur embaressed enough of the doctor and u don't want her there
2007-09-23 07:35:55 · answer #9 · answered by ana c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes...he will know and no he will not tell your mom...Unless he finds a STD....
No need to worry....If your mom will be there, i'm sure she will sit away from the viewing section...
2007-09-23 09:00:55 · answer #10 · answered by slickkittykattwhopurs 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋