about three weeks ago he was my moms dad and he did of a few things including the fact that he was an alocoholic. It was pretty sudden and since the week before he died my mom has drank EVERY day. even on work nights and everything and she doesnt just drink a few shes drunk almost every night. its hard for me to watch because i asked her to stop and she wont. I dont know if its just apart of the grieving process and this is just a phase or is it more than that?(( on a normal week before this happend she would only drink like 2 x a week)) What should i do? ps i told my dad but he hasnt done anything? so help anyone? thanks
2007-09-22 17:35:41 · 9 answers · asked by marieklarich77 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
my parents are still together but my dad doesnt seem to care about this
2007-09-22 17:50:33 · update #1
Talk to her, and if that doesnt help talk to another adult in your life. If her father was an alcaholic she runs a higher risk that most other people of being one too. Truth is tho, dealing with the death of a parent is hard, she may have turned to alcahol to help the pain.
She needs help and support and that is all you can do.
Good luck, and take care of yourself
2007-09-22 17:43:03 · answer #1 · answered by Soon to be Mrs. Welsh 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all sweetie, unfortunately there is nothing you can do for her. I know it is hard, my dad is an alcoholic, just because he likes the stuff. You can talk to your counselor at school and ask him or her if they can help you find a support group you can go to. I think it is called Alanon. It is similar to AA. The drinking thing will have to be something she gives up on her own. If you don't feel comfortable talking to her about it, write a letter to her or email her so she will see it when she gets to work. Let her know how much it is upsetting you and that you need her, you need the chance to grieve too, it is not all about her right now. Tell her that you know she loves him (keep it in present tense) and tell her that he will always live on in her heart. It is hard for all of you.
If she still insists on drinking see if you can get some of your family and her friends close friends of the family together and have an intervention. Let her know just what she would be losing, it is a tought decision to make and you have to be wiling and able to walk away from her if she chooses the alcohol over all of you. Pray that it doesn't have to come to that. God will answer your prayers....just remember, he does it in his time and not yet or not at this time doesn't mean no. He may have something planned for your family that all of you need to learn out of it.
Good Luck, my prayers are with you.
2007-09-23 00:51:04 · answer #2 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's part of the grieving process, yes, but not a normal part. The stages of grieving are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. She's probably in depression, and doesn't want to feel anything because she's so upset. Alcohol is a temporary relief, but it stops helping, so she drinks more. She needs to go see a therapist, because she obviously isn't coping very well. I don't know what you can do to make her go, besides telling her you love her and are worried. Hopefully your dad will come around.
2007-09-23 00:44:11 · answer #3 · answered by Chels 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's possible that this is a grieving process yet not a good one. If you told your dad, I'm thinking they are no longer married or if they are they work different shifts and your father doesn't see this.
You need to confront your mom about her drinking and how you feel. There are other options out there for you too. It could be other family members, friends (your moms), clergy or AA.
2007-09-23 00:47:47 · answer #4 · answered by Mignon F 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I can relate, my dad is the same way only not becuase a loved one has died, because he is addicted to it. I know how hard that it is to watch someone whom you love be so self destructive, and how they won't quit no matter what you say or do in an attempt to motivate them. My dad went to rehab once but it didn' help, honestly I don't think that you can do anything. I know that it's not what you wanna hear, but for your mom and my dad to quit THEY have to want to. No matter what we say, or do if they choose not to quit then they'll continue to do it. I hope your mom quits, I really do! P.S. I'm sorry about your grandpa.
2007-09-23 00:42:55 · answer #5 · answered by ... 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey, I'm sorry for your loss. Your mother seems to following in grandpa's footsteps. Don't allow yourself to be sucked into her addiction. Talk to a counselor, a friend, the mom of a friend, a Pastor. Find support, but don't become a victim. You can get through these teen years and I know it's hard.
2007-09-23 14:45:47 · answer #6 · answered by ElioraImmanuel 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
honestly i dont know what to tell you but when my grandpa died, she got depressed and was like that for about 2 years......she drank alot. i think maybe she needs support, dont support her drinking of course but talk to her and remind her about the good things in life..and tell her how much it bothers you. good luck
2007-09-23 00:42:03 · answer #7 · answered by ♪♫♪ My Angel♪♫♪ I Love You♪♫♪ 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
call a friend of hers you know and can trust and maybe they will take her to the doctor. take care.
2007-09-26 21:23:48 · answer #8 · answered by Tsunami 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know what to say, except im sorry about your grandfather =(
rip
xox <3
2007-09-23 12:01:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋