My Mom is aweful, she cheated, lied, etc. My Dad is pretty crushed, what can I do to help him out?
2007-09-22 17:14:13 · 11 answers · asked by aiden 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm 18, I don't live at home and I can take sides because I do know the real story
2007-09-22 17:25:59 · update #1
In some cases you've got to stay out of the problem, BUT not here. As you said, your mom is aweful, cheated, lied, and who knows what else she did. Your dad seems to be a good guy and your mom a douche (sorry). Be there for your dad, support him, and if you have any siblings, be there for them too and try to help them understand what's going on.
2007-09-22 17:34:13 · answer #1 · answered by Nickz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Awww..... that's a tough spot for you to be in...how considerate of you....... before I say anything else, let me just say this.... there is ALWAYS 2 sides of EVERY story so don't assume you know everything.... people generally have good intentions, and I think ur mom will probably be going through a hard time as well. For your dad tho....I bet he's glad to have your support! I strongly urge that you don't get involved in any "mom bashing" with your dad or anyone else tho.....stay respectful and try to understand both viewpoints... I would suggest you help keep your dads attitude positive and maybe go out and have fun with him, keep encouraging him to be happy with or without her.......It never feels like it at the time, but EVERYTHING feels better and gets easier to deal with in given time. Go see a movie or watch some football or baseball with your dad!
2007-09-23 00:24:19 · answer #2 · answered by sadewl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like a very loving son. I am sure both of you can get past this if you support one another. There are many great support groups for you and your dad. I include you as well because I am sure that it was just as devastating for you as it was to him. The fact that you are concerned about him tells us a lot about you. I am sure he finds great comfort in having a son like you.
2007-09-23 00:27:19 · answer #3 · answered by pattycarrillof 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not sure how old you are.....if you are young, this is his deal. Though you can always call one of his "guy friends" and let them know that you are worried about your dad and that he is "pretty crushed". Men have a hard time reaching out for help and if you call one of his friends, he will not let you or your dad down. I promise!!
2007-09-23 00:19:38 · answer #4 · answered by jewels 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Regardless, taking sides is a bad idea. Your father has part of the responsibility for this mess, even if his only fault was choosing the wrong woman. A parent should be the one supporting YOU, not the other way around.
2007-09-23 00:19:37 · answer #5 · answered by orderly logic 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
please don't say your mom is awful, okay? listen, these are their problems. these are NOT your problems at all. these are problems between your parents. you need to be indifferent. don't get down on one parent or another. you don't know the complication of it. you don't know what went on behind the scenes or between them. people don't cheat because they're awful people, aiden. they do it for so many reasons. okay- some are selfish i admit that. but some are depressed, severely. some are sad and lonely. you'll understand when you're not so angry and your older. my husband isn't an awful person, but he did cheat on me five years ago. it was terrible. i was broken hearted, depressed, you name it. i was just sick. i thought i'd never get through it and i thought he WAS a bad, bad person. i mean, here i was a good wife, a good mom, sitting at home waiting for him and he was out cheating. no... no... that's not really how it was. it's how i FELT, but making a long story short, we were having bad problems at the time. i pushed him away and thought i wasn't in love with him anymore. he found someone else- for one night. we DID get through it because we BOTH wanted to. your parents are beyond that. but it's not your problem. it's their issues. you can't get involved. i understand you wanting to take your dad's side, i really do, but i hope he isn't supporting that, and i hope he isn't telling you things that you have no business getting in to. BOTH your parents love you to death i'm sure. mothers have a strong bond and without their children's love- they'll die. okay, not literally. you need to make it clear you don't support what your mom did, but you support her as your mom. you need to show your dad you love him and you're there for him. but you're his CHILD, not his friend or his confident. don't let either of your parents pull you to their side. hopefully they're not doing that. your parents did this to each other and unfortunatly it's going to affect you. i'm sorry for your loss. it's horrible i'm sure. buit both your parents love you and you need to love them unconditionally as they would love you. don't take sides. BOTH your parents are going through hell, i promise you.
2007-09-23 00:28:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Stay out of it. There are 2 sides to every story and you should not be involved. Dont take sides and stay out of it.
2007-09-23 00:20:10 · answer #7 · answered by happydawg 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
listen if he wants to talk. try to engage him in activities where you can bond. don't encourage any habit-forming activities (e.g. drinking, etc.). just show him that you're there for him. it's not the end of the world. he has to move on and live his life.
2007-09-23 00:20:17 · answer #8 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just be there and listen to him i imagine you are crushed your self sorry to hear it but it happened to my neice and nephew too my nephew is 6 and my neice is newly wed maybe just be glad u are old enough to understand and lend an ear.
2007-09-23 00:20:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
all u hav 2 do is b there for him..show him tht u care nd u understand tht hes heartbroken
2007-09-23 00:31:19 · answer #10 · answered by ♥princess... 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋