i have been with my husband 3 and a half years and married for 2 and a half years. im 22 and he is 20...
we have had our ups and downs like most married people...but things have been getting better.
i have a 4 year old little girl from another relashionship.she loves my husband very much im sure she thinks the sun shine out his a**
we were getting on very well. he took me out once and month and we had lunch together once a week..we were happy
then when my husband was away 5 days ago he sent a text saying he no longer wants to be married but he still loves and cares for me and my lil girl.. this came with no warning he said he has felt like this for a long time
how can i make him stay???
help please..
2007-09-22 10:10:12 · 15 answers · asked by HANNAH R 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he said he believes i have cheated on him...i hate lies and to me cheating is the biggist lie of them all...
i have said i WILL do ANY thing he wants me to do but he says its no good.
2007-09-22 10:19:10 · update #1
my huband is in the army so if he leaves me i have 3 months to find a new house and move..
2007-09-22 10:22:33 · update #2
You cant 'make' anyone stay in a relationship thier not wanting.
Maybe you also thought the sun shined out his a** and didnt see what he was feeling ??
2007-09-22 10:20:03 · answer #1 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Both of you are way too young, anyway. It was doomed to begin with, unfortunately. Cut your losses and move on. Mature people don't text each other, so that's a big clue right there that he's just not ready. You can't make him stay, as others have said. You can only do what's best for your child and that is concentrate on your child and don't worry about your social/love life for a very long time. Enough damage has been done to the little one.
2007-09-22 11:18:22 · answer #2 · answered by gma 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok - if you are not cheating on him - tell him to go to hell. you are not property which he can sell and rid himself of, you and your daughter are his family and he owes you much more than that. he needs to understand the responcibilities of MARRIAGE. it is not like changing your undewear, something you can toss away without any repercutions. he is only twenty? not even old enough to drink and making life changing decisions so frivolously - i think he needs to think about all of this a little bit more. i would say DO NOT MOVE OUT OF THE HOUSE......he wants the divorce, than make him move. i know the service will force the situation but in divorce court if you leave - than you may have problems in the proceedings later.
honestly it sounds like maybe he feels an urge to be the cheater - dont you think? abrupt decision, accusations that you are cheating, no answers to explain - maybe you should question him about the cheating part
2007-09-22 10:39:11 · answer #3 · answered by litlbigdg 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have the right idea, you need to be willing to do ANYTHING that he wants. This means anal sex, swallowing, threesomes with other women, letting him watch you with other men, prostituting yourself, orgies, gangbangs, allowing him to be with other women/men etc. Become his sl*t, his posession. What man could walk away from that? Maybe your vagina is looser than he would like. Vaginaplasty (reshaping and tightening of the vagina) is growing in popularity among women who have not taken proper care of their vaginas, and may be the right choice for you as well. Also, it just occurred to me that your daughter from a previous relationship may be the cause for this, in which case I would suggest putting her up for adoption or selling her on the black market. (If she is blonde and blue eyed you could fetch a pretty penny for her.) There is hope for the two of you, just ask God for the strength to be belittle and degrade yourself so as to prove your worth to your husband. Also, being that he is in the military, there is a strong probability that he is homo, most men drawn to the military are. If he is, this is something you will have to live with, as well as the almost certainty that sooner or later he will infect you with HIV, if he has not already. But really, this is a small price to pay for love. You Go Girl!
2007-09-22 17:14:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No where did you say in this question "no I didn't cheat on him" If he's done why beg him to stay? I understand love but are you just prolonging the inevitable? When my wife of 17 yrs said she wanted out, we talked about it, it was up and down for 4 months, then I had to deal with the fact she just didn't love me and was in love with someone else. It was then that I decided I wouldn't beg for anyone to love me, I'm a good man and if she couldn't see that, then it was her loss. To this day, it was still her loss, Good Luck
2007-09-22 10:24:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I hope you will listen to most of us here cause we care to let you know the Answer. You are going to Pray. But it looks like you are going to loose him sister.Build up yourself and its time to let it go.When someone tells you something its normally whats on there mind. Dont beg you dont need to beg so sister suck up the tears and love you Daughter and file for the Divorce. I know its seem like it could work out but you are young and not yet seen the world.I been there sister and i cried and cried but it didnt work.Move on sister before its to late ok.Find a Church to attend and ask God to show you the way ok sister> Be strong God bless!
2007-09-22 11:46:50 · answer #6 · answered by cortez c 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I hate to say this, but obviously you weren't happy or he wouldn't text you a message like that.. perhaps from your perspective you were, but his words say something different. Unfortunately, all you can do is try talking to him and getting down to the bottom of all this. You can't make someone stay... but you can try to see what's going on and do all you can to correct the problem, if it's something that can be corrected.
2007-09-22 10:17:29 · answer #7 · answered by Wildflower 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You can't MAKE him stay if he doesn't want to...sorry but that is the truth. Too bad for your little girl......you will just have to accept that he wants out of the marriage and feels no obligation to your little girl because she isn't his.
He is accusing you of cheating?? UT OH!! I am willing to bet he is the one cheating....many times the guilty offender will accuse the innocent partner of cheating.
2007-09-22 10:19:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
If he has a new woman in his life, you might find it difficult to make him stay. Just stick around and be patient. When the other woman is gone, he will find his way back to you and your little girl.
2007-09-22 10:20:19 · answer #9 · answered by Belen 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
the first to yell cheating is usally the first to do it.. sorry but he may have found someone new and just dont want to tell you .. you can not make him stay if he dont want to ..
2007-09-22 11:46:50 · answer #10 · answered by vis 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋