I found out about 4 weeks ago that i am pregnant, never been so hapy in my life as i was told that getting pregnant was very difficult with my past fertility problems. I've been with my fella for nearly 8 months now and i love him very much, he is 21 and i am 26. we both tell each other we love one another and feels great. i am 2 months pregnant and he didn't take it well when i told him, he said he is far to young for a baby, he told me tonight that if i have the baby then he wants absolutly nothing to do with me.. but if i get rid then he'll stay.. even me thinking about having an abortion is wrong because i so want this baby but i'm scared of losing my fella and really scared of being on my own with a baby.. i want both and i'm scared in case i make the wrong choice...
2007-09-22 09:57:58 · 52 answers · asked by Tori 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
This is a difficult choice. But I don't think you should abort the baby just to keep him. You should call your local Planned Parenthood and talk to one of their counsellors to help you through this.
2007-09-22 10:02:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 2⤋
First off, congratulations!
I can see what a situation you are in at the moment, it must be really tricky for you. I am a Christian, and i honestly believe that God gave you this child as a blessing- an abortion is wrong, the child deserves you and you deserve a child.
I think that you should have the child, even if it means losing the father. You will not be alone, there is so much help out there, and God will always be watching over you. Now im no religious friek, but God is always there for you when you need him, and i would know.
I say, have the child and be a damn good Mother- then when the father sees what a blessing the child is perhaps he will decide that he wants to stay.
I hope i have helped- i shall pray for you.
2007-09-22 10:06:33 · answer #2 · answered by GigaHaxor309 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I worry because of your fertility problems and would hate for you to have an abortion and not be able to conceive in later life (it might not be connected but you would still feel bad). On the other hand you have to do what YOU want. You havent been seeing each other that long and he is young. If you decide to have the baby, let him know what happens and keep in touch but dont put any pressure on him, eventually he might come round. Maybe.
Not much help i guess but nobody but you can make this decision, good luck and best wishes no matter what you decide
2007-09-22 10:06:02 · answer #3 · answered by emily 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you need to to ask yourself this...
Did your "fella" not know that having unprotected sex was how babies were made?
Most likely he did, in which case if he didn't want a baby he should have kept it in his pants. Too late now. You need to be completely honest with him and yourself. Tell him you are keeping the baby, and he can choose to do what he wants with the information. He may leave you, and if he does, trust me you don't want him anyways. Once you look into your child's eyes, you'll never regret your decision. You don't have to be mean about it, but you do need to get it out. This could be your only chance to have a child, and you should start things off right. Good luck with everything and congratulations.
2007-09-22 10:05:39 · answer #4 · answered by Pregnant with Baby #2 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He isn't worth having. Any man that would say he would stay if you get an abortion is an a-hole and needs to be by himself. If he felt that he was too young for kids then he should have kept his lil peter in his pants. He needs to man up and take responsiblity for his child. And if he wants to leave then let him... why stop him? He probably wouldn't help out anyway considering his selfish attitude. There will be a man out there that will step up so I would have the baby and move on. You want this baby so much and I wouldn't let my bf take that away from me. There are alot of single parents out in this world. You can get by! Good luck!
2007-09-22 10:37:02 · answer #5 · answered by Sariyah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This baby was suppose to happen!!! There is always a reason for everything. I was a single mom for almost 6 years and know I am happily married. The six years I was with my daughter was some of my happiest memories!! Don't get me wrong, it was diffuclt at times, but we made it through it and I am know with the most wonderful man in the world!! My daughter thinks of him as her Daddy(her real dad is not in the picture). This guy is very selfish. Why would you even want to attempt a relationship with him after he said that? This is showing you how he is going to be in the future(it will get worse, trust me) You are at the perfect age to have a baby. I believe you will be very happy with you and your baby and one day you will find the man of your dreams! Just never settle. Your child is a angel sent from heaven!! Also, you will never feel the love for anyone or anything that you feel for your child!! It is the most wonderful feeling in the world. YOU CAN DO THIS GIRL!!Good luck
2007-09-22 10:24:51 · answer #6 · answered by matty 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Im so sorry he's left you to make this kind of decision - he's very much in the wrong for doing so especially since you want this baby so much. Fair enough he might be too young to want to be a dad but you can be a good mum with or without him - I've been in this daunting situation and its made me a stronger person because of it - I am a single mum who has an amazing son who wants for nothing and now his father wants something to do with him.........bit late for him to grow a spine but nonetheless. You and your baby will manage I'm sure of it and I know its not what you want to hear but if this man can lay this on you - get rid as it will only get worse.
I wish you all the luck in the world with your pregnancy hun. Take Care xxx
2007-09-22 10:05:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I just want to say first that I am totally against abortion. Now, it takes two people to make a child and he should have thought about that before having sex. If you truly want this baby then you need to tell him to accept it or take a hike. You say you have had fertility problems. What if this is your one and only chance? Should you choose to abort, what if he doesn't stick around anyway? Or what if you do end up together forever? He may regret killing his child. Everything happens for a reason and you should keep this baby. Good luck to you in whatever you decide.
2007-09-22 10:10:23 · answer #8 · answered by jennifersilva_99 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get rid of him...men come and go but making a little life of your own is a miracle and u never know if this is the one time u will be able to have a child *nothing is ever promised to us*...I knew someone in the same situation,she chose her baby and is happily 8 months and ready to give birth any minute...your baby is innocent and needs a chance,besides there is wic for free formula,food stamps if u need them and other government help for daycare etc...he is being selfish and stubborn,he can lay with you but cant have what comes out of that..obviously he isnt too young to be having sex,now he needs to be an adult and take care of his child,he cant do this its time to see is true colors and get rid of him...he is not worth it. u dont wanna sacrifice something for someone who may not even be around later...u will regret it,i know many girls who still think about it and regret it even years later...good luck!
2007-09-22 10:06:49 · answer #9 · answered by cheerychumms 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Darling, keep that baby!!! Even you said it, you've had problems getting pregnant, this little baby is a miracle and you shouldnt think twice about keeping it. I promise you wont regret it. As for your boyfriend, if he actually said to you "its either the baby or me" well thats a no brain-er. He is clearly not mature enough to be a father. Maybe he'll come around and make the right decision to be a good father or maybe he won't. After all he is young, but there is no excuse, either he steps up or not. Now you have to think about that baby of yours..and try not to elevate your stress levels, eat right and take care of yourself. The most important thing right now is you baby not your boyfriend. There are many fish in the sea. But this baby only has one shot at life. Make the right decision. Goodluck
2007-09-22 10:06:32 · answer #10 · answered by nuvomama07 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
i think you should keep the baby you will be a gret mam and its not that hard bringing up kids yourself no matter what any one says i have 21 month son and im with him 24/7 and i wudnt want it any other way he is so loving likes to be typical little boy but when you look into your babies eyes you will forget all about how you are feeling now i promise i did when i saw my sons good luck hes not worth your tears if hes making you feel like this and remember they say if you want an easy pregnancy and a laid back baby try not to get to stressed through your pregnancy you will be fine
2007-09-22 10:39:40 · answer #11 · answered by sam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋