long story... do you think this is asperger's?

Question

I have been through a lot of things in my life. and always thought i was different in some way - for my brothers (who both have disorders; adhd and aspergers) it was the way they acted, but for me i felt angry and annoyed about being educated at home, i was the only one who questioned things, and the only one who was depressed about my lack of social life. at the age of 12 i started getting depressed or signs of depression, this was because of an event that happened as a child by my father. but also i started rebelling because i was tired of the abnormal 'big brother' setting that i was living in. it was hell, it was like being in a cage.
ive never got on with my mum, and she used to emotionally abuse me when i had depression trying to get me diagnosed as a schizo, an aspie and a number of things ive lost count. so what happened? i started believing it. and now i have no space to think for myself ive started looking towards having asperger's - or is it PTSD? im clueless.

but if all my brothers and sisters have it theres a chance i do.... im ok in social settings i just have a VERY low self esteem, and think people dont want me or love me because im abnormal so i get obbsessed about it even though they say im fine. i just have my mothers vioce in my head. it sucks.

Answer 1

Firstly, as you know, if you know Aspergers, it is on the 'Spectrum' and as such everyone has slightly different behaviours and compulsions.

The one thing that you say that points away from Aspergers is that you 'were depressed at not having a social life'.

You are almost certainly going through some kind of emotional trauma at the moment and there could be a number of different causes from the information you have given, but there is little you say that the majority of young men with a difficult or 'dysfunctional' family would not feel confused about and wonder if they were 'normal.

An Aspergers child, although noticeably withdrawn from society would rarely become depressed about their lack of social life. Indeed they would probably never be aware of it until someone explained that their actions were 'strange' at which point they would most probably work out that they should accept it as it's for their own good and keeping them safe from the less savoury kids who like to exploit such differences.

You accept that you get on with people, just apparently, not your parents, your 'withdrawal' is probably due to your unwillingness to be in a position with others where you may feel compelled to discuss aspects of your childhood you are not comfortable about.

Surprisingly, you already know (without knowing who) possibly dozens of young men who feel or have felt the same way.

From my experience of Aspergers (and I accept I am no consultant Paediatrician) I would doubt if this is your problem. More likely however would be the consideration of it, and other things you are worrying about which are adding to your stresses.

I would suggest you speak to your G.P. but go in with an open mind and don't simply dismiss it if they consider your problems to be based around your emotional circumstances rather than your physical development (Aspergers is a physical lack of the brains development)

Good luck.

Answer 2

The presence of any other psychiatric diagnosis is statistically higher in siblings of people with psychiatric illness than in people without siblings with psychiatric illness, but that does not imply causation, just an association. Nowadays it is hard to find a family without some mental illness in it. I think you should seek counseling (therapy) because feelings such as yours are common among siblings with any kind of an impairment, mental or physical. I don't think labels are necessarily helpful. Dwelling on the past is also not helpful. Cognitive restructuring may be helpful. I would also suggest getting a book on depression by Dr. Burns. It may also help. Good luck.
P.S. I think Asperger's Syndrome is a condition overly diagnosed in my own opinion, like ADHD. Some people are looking for a diagnosis so their medical or educational services will be covered by insurance. I don't disagree with this practice necessarily, it is just a fact of life.

Answer 3

With a background in counseling and psychology, I initially sense that your symptoms are NOT reminiscent of Aspergers. According to DSM-IV-TR as well as professional knowledge, Asperger's disorder has more to do with poor social skills (across the board not just with family), cognitive deficiencies, communication difficulties, and often obsessions/compulsions. Nothing you have described above has hinted at any of that. Another major clue to you probably not having Aspergers is that most who have Aspergers do not have very much awareness of their feelings as you seem to have.

You DO appear to show symptoms of major depression and have experienced some trauma so PTSD is a possibility as agitation/irritability are common signs of both. You also have an increased risk for having Aspergers as the likelihood exponentially increases with each sibling who has the disorder. However, an increased risk is NOT by any means enough or even a factor in diagnosis. I personally feel most people are so consumed with diagnosing that some issues are not necessarily categorized into a disorder but is just a matter of reactions to life experiences. If, in fact you do not have Aspergers, and have lived with siblings who do, it is a normal response to go through a period (or periods) where you are frustrated with your living situation. It is very challenging to work with persons with such conditions much less live with them.

I would encourage two things: 1.) don't be so hard on yourself for feeling frustrated. We all feel this way during various periods of our life for various reasons. 2.) get the opinion of a mental health professional if you are still concerned. They will be able to talk with you, gather more information, and provide you with helpful resources and techniques to help you through this period.

This is in no way my attempt to diagnosis or give you a definitive YES or NO...but it is my personal response your question. Good luck.

P.S. As far as mom attempting to get a schizophrenia diagnosis, good luck b/c Aspergers and Schizophrenia can not run co-occurently, and her "push" for a diagnosis could hints at the possibility of her having her own diagnosis (ex. Munchausen by proxy).

Answer 4

Honey we aren't doctors and can't diagnose you.

Sounds like you are having growing pains. My own younger son has mild autism and I know my older son was limited for a long time. He never complained mind you and was always very helpful and I tried not to hold him back but sometimes it's difficult.

You probably are okay and need to get a hobby or something to think about besides yourself and your problems. Have you read the Harry Potter books? I read them when I am feeling down (yes (I'm a grownup) and it gives me a lift. Good luck.

Your Mom probably is just worried about you.

Answer 5

If you suspect go see an expert. A REAL one.
As someone who has only recently been diagnosed (At Twenty) I can safely say that it will mess you up unless you are ready to know.

Answer 6

Dont listen to what your parents tell you. Just live your life the way you want to. Concentrate on other things.

Answer 7

as the others have said, you really need to go and see someone who knows about this stuff. the more you think about it, the more it will affect you. be strong and get the help you need and deserve. dont worry about your siblings having problems, its doesn't mean you will. i have bi polar, as does my mother, and as did my grandad, but my siblings are fine.
i wish you luck on your journey of self discovery and healing xxx