why is a guy's motive for being distant to his wife of one year? If you no longer wanted to be married why not just say so?
2007-09-21 08:38:31 · 10 answers · asked by pchristine84 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Could be a lot of things. You are kind of vague as to what you mean by "distant", and you never say how long this has been going on.
It is natural for people to feel closer to each other at certain times than at others. Romantic love can be mentally exhausting, and some people need some down time to themselves to recover mental energy. If you won't let him have some space to himself, he will probably pull father away until he gets his need for "me time" satisfied (note: this does NOT excuse cheating).
Love also goes through different phases. Don't expect every year of your marriage to be the same as your honeymoon. Both of you grow and change over the years, but these changes don't have to divide the two of you.
He could also be going through some problems at work. Often women like to talk about their problems to release stress, but guys tend to do the opposite. Guys don't like to talk about their problems until they have had time to mentally process their thoughts and feelings in silent contemplation first.
Just because you feel distant doesn't mean that he actually knows how you feel. He might not realize how "distant" you feel, or why it is important to you to feel emotionally close. Even if he does, he might not know what to do about it unless you make it clear to him what it is that you expect him to do in order for you to feel "close" again (which means you have to figure out for yourself first what it is that you want, so that you can explain it to him).
Also make sure that you are not just suffering from a false expectation of how marriage should be. many women go into marriage thinking that every day will be pure bliss, just to get disillusioned to find out that for the most part married life really isn't all that different from single life. You still have to go to work, pay the bills, and run errands just as before, and sometimes romance is saved for the occasional weekend getaway or vacation since that is the only time that you have a chance to put the cares of the world aside and find time for each other.
Talk to him and find out!
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This article about marriage is good, BTW:
2007-09-21 09:00:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The amount of time you've been married really doesn't matter so much because you can develop toxic communication habits very early on in a relationship. More often than not, he's probably withdrawing because you can't both find common ground between your divergent points of view....rather than fight about it, he just increases the distance because in his mind "what's the point of having this same argument over again". This doesn't mean he doesn't want to be married, but it does mean he's feeling trapped in a loop that won't stop, and if I'm right about this, so are you. So, you both need to find a way to get some communication help. It can be done on your own, but it's better accomplished with professional guidance, particularly since you're already in trouble. Good luck to you both.
2007-09-21 08:49:58 · answer #2 · answered by Captain S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-17 07:02:00 · answer #3 · answered by jaffe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't really answer that. I doubt anyone can. Just talk to him. That's the only way you'll know for sure what's going on with him. You're his wife you have the right to know.
2007-09-21 08:44:11 · answer #4 · answered by DoLz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how do you know he doesn't want to be married?? have you talked with him?? go to the beach with him at night while it's still warm and just have it out. it could be work too.
2007-09-21 09:00:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think rjrmpk has the right idea. He's doing something he's afraid or embarrassed to talk about.
2007-09-21 08:46:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on the guy. Ask him and have a talk with him about your suspections.
2007-09-21 08:43:24 · answer #7 · answered by Scpwnz 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's just because it's football season
2007-09-21 08:45:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yep it dosen't look good, he knows he made a mistake, but he dosen't want to hurt ur feelings and tell u that.
2007-09-21 08:44:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's doing something he's afraid to tell you about!
2007-09-21 08:42:17 · answer #10 · answered by rjrmpk 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋