Choosing to work instead of staying at home?

Question

Who feels that women who choose to work, when they have kids, are not fully providing for their children as they should?

God didn't choose for the man to stay at home.

Answer 1

Babe great point and listen i am also not a feminist and am Indian so we women pride ourselves being super mom and soccer moms..... single though for now.... lol

Answer 2

There are deffinately two sides to it. I am a stay at home mom and my feelings are that I did not have children to let someone else raise them...they are my responsability.
I am also blessed that my husband would not have it any other way. He is in total support of my being home with our kids and does whatever is necessary to make that happen.
Some woman do choose to work even though they don't have to. I don't understand why they would want to have children if they don't want to care for them even if they have the chance...but that is my opinion and that does not make it wrong for them to choose that. I also know that some woman view being a stay at home mom as "unproductive" or "unsuccessful." Some people's view is that you have to have a career to be successfull...my thoughts are look at the young generation and how screwed up they are, no manner, no respect, etc....I do believe we need more dedicated parents.
There are also the mothers who don't have a choice. They are either single or just need the income to pay bills.
I also know that being a stay at home mom is very hard!! It is a tireing, nonstop, no days off job. I also homeschool and so that makes the days off even less...but none the less it is not a job that is cut out for everyone!
However people do choose to do it I won't judge someone for doing it differant than me or choosing something that I don't even understand. To each their own choice.

Answer 3

I was a stay at home mom in the 1970s and 80s with both my kids.. I could afford to be but we were on a tight budget.. My son is a letter carrier for US Post Office and his wife got her Master's degree in teaching, but the public school system won't hire her since they say she doesn't have enough experience.. They have 2 boys now..One is 3 and the other is 3 months.. She works as a teacher at the daycare where they go.. She gets a really big discount for the kids and I take the baby 2 days a week to help out.. They can't afford the mortgage and such if she doesn't work.. My son works sometimes 6 days a week in overtime to meet the bills.. I would love to do more, but financially I don't have it.. I feel they could cut back on some of the ammenities they want and do, but I don't say anything..My daughter in law would love to stay home and raise her kids. My son does alot in the house when he is home.. cook, clean, give the kids baths, etc.. So, it's not easy for either of them.. My heart goes out to all who have to work and can't stay home.. My daughter use to say that you shouldn't have kids if you can't stay home and raise them.. Now, she just got married at 36 and wants a baby.. Her new husband is in college, and not really working.. She makes 80,000 a year and if she has a baby, will most likely have to put the baby in daycare since she is the big bread winner.. I don't live too close so I can't help, and her mother in law goes to a nursing home everyday to take care of her father in law who had a stroke only 6 months before their wedding last year and is not doing good at all.. No babysitting there.. I hate to think another of my grandchildren will end up in daycare, but I'm only one person.. The grandfather and I are divorced and he remarried.. He's useless! My hat is off to the working moms who really HAVE to work and not just to get away from the kids! Good Luck to All

Answer 4

Yes, absolutely! I know this is "politically incorrect" but I don't care. If she works a few hours a wk and the children are being watched by a family member who love them, then that's one thing. When the child is at a day care center 9 hours a day with strangers that don't care 2 craps about the child - then that child is not being fully provided for by the parents. Then these crazy people say "but the child is more independent" HELLO... the child is 2! why would you want them to be independent!
children need their parents. Sure the parents love them, they just don't realize how they are hurting them

Answer 5

I hate this debate. You can't say they aren't fulling providing for them.

In my opinion, I think working moms are doing what is best for their children. In some households, two working parents are needed to support even basic living needs.

Unless you are willing to help pay those families bills, then you can't make this judgement.

I have know many, many excellent, caring, supportive, active and loving working mothers.

Also, there is a huge different between; mom goes to work at 8am and comes home at 4pm; then mommy goes to work at 6am and comes home at 6pm.

I think a lot of people assume working mothers are gone ALL day long. The truth is, they aren't. They work 9-5 and then are home making dinner and doing homework.

Don't assume every working mom is the CEO of a company putting in 12 hour days and never seeing little Johnny. It's just not true. Many working moms are teachers or accounts.

Also, please don't quote the Bible. If you read (and study it academically) it, you will find it more favorable to women then you think. In addition, the bible has basically two sides to every story. Some in the Jewish faith even believe the bible (which is the root of the Christian Bible) was written by a women.

Answer 6

I personally couldn't do it that's why I'm a SAHM. I felt like I didn't have a choice but to stay home. So we made it possible for me to stay home. I do work part time in the evening's and weekends. But I'm able to be with my son.

As for other's that choose to work while their children are put in care, it's hard for me to be neutral on the subject because I do have my own beliefs when it comes to my son. And I have my own thought's and feeling's when I think about my child. I think that children definately need their parent's and I'm saying that because I see babie's being put in care way too young.

Everybody has to do what is best for their child. I give working mom's credit because I know, I couldn't do it.

Answer 7

Well, I have 2 boys...ages 14 and 2. I stayed home with my 14 year old and refused to work because I didn't believe in day-care.

I now have a 2 year old, work full time, and he is in daycare. He seems to be so happy, and it appears that he doesn't really miss me as much as I hoped he would.

I must admit, too, that I am a happier person working than staying at home. It takes a special person to stay home with the kids. I guess I just don't have the patience for that.

I am a much better mom, I feel, with my 2nd child than my first one....because I work. I am a more patient mother....

I vote for working!

Answer 8

There has never been any evidence that staying home with the kids is better for them than going to work. In fact, when you're there all day to cater to their every whim, what kind of example are you setting? They'll grow up thinking that they're owed a living. Furthermore, should you get divorced, or should your husband die or lose his job, what will you be able to do for your children then? You should at least have some of your own money to fall back on.

Answer 9

I don't think it is right because i know how it feels to not be able to provide for your child and if you spend enough quality time with them they will understand. I mean when they start going to school such as pre-K or Kindergarten they wont be able to spend time with you anyway so...does that mean you are not providing for your children? I am a mother of 3 all under the age of 4 and In order to pay rent and pay for diapers/food etc.. me AND my husband have to work or we wont make it. I don't think it is wrong in any way if you are working to keep a roof over their head then you "are providing " for them. I do think about it also and feel bad that i cannot spend every second of the day with them but i think as long as you are loving and do spend some quality time with your children and take care of them that is all that matters and they will grow up knowing that life is not easy and you tried your best to keep them healthy and happy and have a bright future.

Answer 10

Well I stayed at home with all four of mine till my youngest got into kindergarten. And have been working ever since. So from both prespectives The kids will be fine if mommy works. I was going to school when my older two was younger and they went to daycare and I will tell you what the two I had that went to daycare versus the two that didnt they were more socially aggressive and learned alot quicker. Almost a street wise type of attitudes and ways about them. The other two are a little shyer. To me either way is fine but man I miss sleeping in a bit and having days at home...I hate working lol

Answer 11

I certainly don't feel that way. I'm often stunned by how judgmental people are. Why does everyone think that everyone else lives, thinks and feels like they do? It's up to the parent/s to decide which avenue to take, and what best suits the needs of the FAMILY. Sometimes (more often than not) it means getting a paycheck. Only 15% of non-welfare mothers are stay-at-home moms. The stay-at-home dads are a much smaller (but growing) percentage. Life is complicated, and so are people.