I've been seeing somebody for several months. Before me, she had an ongoing physical relationship with her exboyfriend who would play games with her. He cheated on her. He would sleep with her and then blow her off which hurt her emotionally, but she kept going back anyway. My girlfriend and I made an arrangement that she would not see him any more.
Now she has "coincidentally" ended up in a class with him. After the last class she was an hour late getting over to meet me and she didn't call, which is very unlike her, and she told me she was hanging out with him. I'm also suddenly noticing some weirdness in our relationship, but this could just be jealousy on my part -- it's hard to tell.
She insists that what they had is totally over and she's only interested in being with me.
So what's the appropriate course of action?
2007-09-21 05:41:27 · 17 answers · asked by MrWrong 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Talk with her and tell her how it really makes you feel. If you don't want her to see him at all or talk to him, then as your girlfriend she should respect you and not do so. If she doesn't respect you and continues to see him, then dump her. She's not worth your time. You can find better. I'd give her maybe two more chances.
2007-09-21 05:49:42 · answer #1 · answered by usagrrl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is over him and you guys made an arrangement that she wouldn't see him anymore, then I would feel the same way you are. Why don't you try talking to her about the situation, over a nice dinner, and after a while into the night you bring it up in a nice way. Don't sound jealous, but you need the reassurance that she doesn't want anything to do with him, and just wants you, like you stated. I'm sure if you get her to know how you feel she will understand (like if she were to put herself into your shoes). This is what I would do. If it doesn't work then give her the deuces.
2007-09-21 05:54:44 · answer #2 · answered by Rayzor 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If that is the agreement you two made then you need to stick by it. She is with you now and he is an ex for a reason. She needs to cut the ties to him because obviously she hasn't got over him which is apparent by her actions. Ask her how she would feel if the situation was reversed. I am pretty sure she wouldn't like it. If she can't respect you or the relationship then maybe it isn't meant to be.
2007-09-21 05:50:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's so much going on here...but here it goes
1. she's not respecting you or the relationship because she is still talking to his ex
2. if she would go back to him is because I think she got use to him and now for her is normal being in a physical relationship and that's really sad and common with people that go throught that stuff
3. If I was you I wouldn't be taking her crap I mean she say's that she is tottally interested in you then why is she going back to the past??? does it matter??
honestly I don't belive the who being friends with your ex thing because when either of the people get to a relationship there new mate is not going to be kool with it....and also it does not show good respect to the new mate!!
2007-09-21 05:52:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, sounds like someone I know. Girls like this are tough to read. The ones that normally fall for the bad guys. You probably dont want to lose her so you cant really threaten her with leaving if you tell her to not talk to him outside of class. And of course she'll play the insecure card on you. I guess the one thing Ive always tried to tell myself in this situation is dont give her a reason to not like you more than him. As hard as it might be give her what she wants, act secure if your not and give her what she was missing with him. If she ends up leaving you for him, I know it will suck for a while but she'll be back and then you dont have to live with the guilt of knowing you screwed up and if only I would of done things different.
2007-09-21 05:52:24 · answer #5 · answered by brandonneary 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is tough to answer. Maybe you should try talking to her best friend, because if she is someone you can talk to easily, she wouldn't want to keep knowledge of her best friend and her ex quiet. She'd tell you. You could also see if she is meeting up with him outside school/college/uni hours. If so go along with them, make plans for you to go with your girlfriend, her ex and her best friend somewhere. At least this way you'd see if he tried it on with her and how she reacts. Because if he is a bit of a player, then it won't matter to him whether you're there and he's trying it on. I hope this is of some help.
2007-09-21 05:53:59 · answer #6 · answered by FreezingCold:( 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
check her mobile for any dodgy texts/calls from him (sounds stalkerish but thats where you'll find evidence). If she starts "guarding" her phone I would say its a pretty safe bet that she's cheating and if she starts making excuses to go places at weird times or starts taking lots longer to come back thats another sign. Even if she isn't cheating right now she may be cheating mentally because she wants her ex back.
2007-09-21 05:51:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man I would be pissed, this is totally wrong on her part if you both had an agreement. I wouldn't approve of that period! I say you leave her and get on with your life because she's going to keep going back. Don't waste your time and don't get played!
2007-09-21 05:50:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As strange as it may seem, there are some people out there that enjoy being in a destructive relationship. I think that your gf must be into emotional pain. I do think she is seeing him, he must be a bad habit, like cocaine. You should fallow her, in order to have the prove that there is something truly going on, then confront her.
2007-09-21 05:50:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it particularly is basically favourite to nevertheless sense a pang nonetheless you have moved on once you cared a great deal some guy or woman and then lose them, plus the quantity of time on account that your breakup is purely too short so which you will have not have been given any emotions relating to him.
2016-10-19 07:45:11 · answer #10 · answered by jeremie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋