hi going out for a meal in a couple of weeks with my 2 sisters and their husbands ,the thing is my sister always suggests ,well she doesnt she just goes and puts all our meals together and everyone pays all the same the thing is and i dont want to sound mean my husband only ever has one drink while they have 6 or 7 cause he drives us there she will order a half bottle of wine and drink it all , we are abit strapped for cash at the minute as getting a new kitchen if i say can we have separate bills i know she will take it wrong ,am i being a meany ??i cannot afford to keep doing this with the bills so i might not go , what would you do??
2007-09-21 02:29:42 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
iluvmyman , i would do that but its my other sisters birthday and she wants to go out for a meal.xx
2007-09-21 02:50:08 · update #1
tell the waiter or waitress point blank to put your and husband's meals on a separate ticket as you are ordering.
if the other four want to split the rest, let them.
ASSERT YOURSELF! Don't let others use you or con you to help pay for their drinking problem.
otherwise stay home.
2007-09-21 03:01:35 · answer #1 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Since the meal is already planned, you need to go ahead and pay as always. However, you should say something before your next get together is planned. That way your sisters will have the heads up that you need to cut back. It might be better to bow out of the invitations rather than to bring up the unfairness of how much they drink. That could be a touchy subject. Maybe if you limited your get togethers to special occassions like bdays, anniv., etc. they might be more understanding. In our family, we do not go out much because it is expensive for us. Instead we get together at each others' homes. We like to cook and don't have to figure out what to do with the kids that way.
2007-09-21 10:50:15 · answer #2 · answered by I39 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So you are strapped for cash and you can't afford it anymore...what about having them over for drinks and everyone brings a bottle or a 12 pack of something?Everybody would save money then!
2007-09-21 09:44:32 · answer #3 · answered by iluvmyman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would tell her the deal, tell her you have your own things to pay for, like your kitchen. Tell her if you and your husband cant pay for yall own ticket, then yall will not be attending the outing. Let her think what she wants to think. You and your husband are the one paying the bills, not your sisters. Be Smart.
2007-09-21 09:40:09 · answer #4 · answered by Bout It 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you either have to talk to her before-hand and explain your situation, or bite the bullet and pay. If she takes it wrong and gets mad, then she is kind of being a jerk in my opinion. But I would still explain beforehand so you are not forced to deal with this kind of thing forever with her. Just talk to her and get it over with is what I would do. good-luck.
2007-09-21 10:58:43 · answer #5 · answered by undone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont b scarred of ur sister. tell her your mind, bc i believe she is taking advantage of u. so if she wants to be anoyed with u, let her be, rather than u pretending to u happy whereas u r not.
u know what, in life never displiz ur self 2 pliz sb, bc man is weeked, always try ur best to make ple happy but not to an extend.
and what i have noted in life is that nomatter how u try to be nice,ple think u r foolished.and when u change ur altitude, they say u r proud........................., so its better to let them underst who u are from the beginning.
2007-09-21 10:02:03 · answer #6 · answered by R.M.zoneziwoh 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
before you go, have a conversation with your sister and let her know, tell her that you enjoy the time that you spend with her and that you need to have a seperate check, or there is just no way that you and your husband will be able to go...
2007-09-21 09:43:13 · answer #7 · answered by switchmistress 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ring her up and tell her you haven't got much money but you are still going but can i get our bill separate plz as we haven't got much ,if she is understanding she will say yes if she funny ,well you know the saying ,you can choose your friends but not your family ,good m8 xx
2007-09-21 10:16:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Been there done that......... Speek up, otherwise it actually gets worse.......... Worst part is, they actually know what they are doing !!!!!!!!
2 kids vs 6 kids. - Non Drinker vs 2 drinkers.
Works out very unfair.....
2007-09-21 09:46:11 · answer #9 · answered by littlemonstersx2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you don't want to talk to her about the problem then just don't go and save yourself some heatt ache
2007-09-21 09:40:14 · answer #10 · answered by oh_jo123 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋