As an athiest, leaning towards agnostic, when I die why is the only place I can be buried is religious ground?

Question

This question has my brain melted! So I hope I'm phrasing it correctly , and you all get what I'm on about...I'm Irish, was baptised and became athiest at the age of 16, I'm now 26 and am still very happy in my beliefs....my family is Catholic and go to mass and all that and deceased relatives are all buried in our parish graveyard...So my problem is, as I have started my own family now, I am raising my daughter to be educated in all areas of life and to make her own decision on religion when she wants to, but if she is athiest too and so is my partner then why is a church cemetry the only place we can be buried?

Would we have to get a funeral mass and all that too? I just dont get it...maybe its just Ireland still being backwards and other countries have the answer to this question!?

I want to be cremated but aparantly I still have to have an empty coffin to go in a plot of expensive land...

Right so, thanks everyone for their great answers...no thankyous go to the eejits who gave silly answers, but then it wouldnt be the same Yahoo Answers without you lot...
- I had asked the parish priest in my hometown about cremation and he said i'd still need to have a 'marker on holy ground' as he like to put it...so i maybe misunderstood this for having to buy a plot and all, also my grandfather (catholic) wants to be cremated (there is no problem with this in Eire by the way) and he was told he needs to purchase a coffin to be cremated in (this is what i ment , apologies for my crappy wording)

-I dont have a problem with a mass for my family to do their thing after i die, but i didnt want it to be my only memorial sevice, where i was a 'good christian' and all that stuff that im not!

- Also to ther person who mentioned i be buried in the excluded suicide persons graveyard...i dont think we are that backward anymore thankfully :)

- And to the person who said i shouldnt say religion is backward....i didnt , i said Eire can be backward when it comes to such things, that we arent more open to others opinions.

-Also those who said 'you'll be dead, why do u care where ure buried' ... well theres alot of reasons actually :) Open your minds a little maybe you'll start seeing beyond the borders you put up around your mind :)

Answer 1

No, you can have your ashes scattered anywhere. I want mine blown up my fathers nose..

Answer 2

Better to ask someone who is familiar with such laws in the area where you live. Each place is different. Perhaps you can be an agent for change if what you find out isn't to your liking.

Whatever you find out and however old you are, be sure to make a will stating your wishes and give copies to trustworthy people. The likelihood of your wishes being honored are increased.

In Taiwan where I live, you can be cremated, or you can be buried, after seven years have your remains disinterred, cleaned and put in an urn, or be buried in the ground to stay, often in a rice field. Any way but cremation is very expensive.

Answer 3

Cremation is the only answer these days. All the cemeteries are full. Scatter your ashes somewhere that means something to you.
Why on earth would there be a requirement for an empty coffin to be buried? Which country are you in that makes that a requirement?
will be cremated and scattered on the beach. There will be NO religious ceremony at all. The family can come and sit on the beach at least once a year if they wish. Party time.

Answer 4

I know in the US there are completely nonreligious funerals that people have. There are humanist celebrants who do nonreligious funerals. I don't know if you have any where you live but you could check online through the American Humanist Association website. They should have international referall there if you aren't in the US. I also don't understand why you would need to buy a plot if you are going to be cremated. I know there are cemetaries that are considered secular although I don't know how they get the distinction. The Catholic church used to actually forbid babies that died before baptism being buried in the sacred plots. Sad, huh? So there should be nonchurch cemetaries around you. I just don't know why you need one if you are going to be cremated. Do a bit more questioning and research. I think you have other options. Good luck.

Answer 5

You don't HAVE to be buried in Ireland or anywhere else - if you want to be cremated you can have a memorial but at the end of the day your wishes must be honoured and if you choose not to be buried or have a memorial in a church graveyard then that is your choice. I'm sure that if you don't pay then they won't just give you a plot!

Answer 6

In England you can apply to be buried on your own land if you wish, though there are certain factors to consider such as, if a new owner of your property decides they want you moved and exhumed they can apply for this so their is no guarantee you will rest in peace, future owners can deny access for relatives wishing to pay their respects, the Environment Agency can intervene if you are believed to be polluting a water course, the properties value may be reduced due to your interment and the land could be redeveloped again moving you as the area isn't designated as a burial ground.

Other than that just because the families tradition is to be buried with all the ceremony that goes with it and a plot has been reserved for you, if your next of kin follows your request for cremation then other than upsetting the religious arm of your family I can't see there being any issue why your wishes couldn't be carried out and a you could draw up a service that you are happy with for people to gather to pay their respect to you.

Answer 7

Your funeral is more for the people left behind than it is for you. You'll be dead and won't know the difference. But your family might get comfort from the religious aspect of the ceremony.
Here's info on cremation in ireland http://www.citizensinformation.ie/categories/death/after-a-death/cremations
You don't need to bury an empty coffin.

Answer 8

This isn't the position in Ireland. You can be cremated with your coffin - just make sure that your wishes are well known and well documented. No-one is going to force a requiem mass and Catholic burial on you if you've made it clear you don't want one. The Church has quite enough to do.

If you're leaning towards agnostic, you'll probably have changed your mind again by the time you die.

Answer 9

"I want to be cremated but apparently I still have to have an empty coffin to go in a plot of expensive land..."
Not in Oz - that's the point of cremation - not taking up valuable real estate.
Mum went up in smoke back in 96 and dad had a plaque put on the wall where all the other plaques were at the cemetery.
Maybe they do different stuff in Eire.

Answer 10

I absolutely agree. I've always wanted to be buried on the side of a remote hilltop with an acorn in my chest-cavity, but I'm told that that's illegal. I think that sucks...

Cremation seems to me the only real alternative on a practical basis, considering how much perfectly good land is being wasted on wooden boxes filled with bones and... you get the drift. I didn;t know about still needing the coffin - how absolutely senseless is that?!

Answer 11

You don't have to be buried or cremated in the ways you outline.
There is no real reason why you can't be buried in a cardboard box in your back garden, for example.
That said, I believe there are rules concerning the health of those you leave behind who may suffer as a result of the decomposition of your body, and other such potential problems.