My eight-year-old grandson is getting to the stage where he no longer is happy playing with his brothers (seven and three) and in fact is a bad influence on the younger one and intimidates the middle one.
When my boys were that age I enrolled them in the cubs and that was just what they needed in order to channel their growing independence from me (which I wanted to happen) into something useful for them - and for me as it gave me a rest!
The problem is that rather than being allowed to explore that independence from his parents by relating to others of his own age in a group (outside of school which is too academically oriented these days)he is being allowed to think that he has that independence by being indulged with all sorts of "designer" clothes and so on.
Cubs are apparently out (I *made* my third go until he found a swimming club as an alternative) so I wonder if there are any other suggestions that I may not have thought of where he can mix with boys of his own age.
2007-09-20 09:31:42 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
well "soccermomfrom..." the designer clothes are being given as a *substitute* for him feeling he has real independence over *some* things and that is what I mean - the parents still must have overall control but he is at an age where he needs to start learning to fend for himself to some degree - the cubs (as they used to be) would be ideal.
2007-09-20 17:39:19 · update #1
Big props to you for making your boys stick it out in Cubs!!! I am doing the same with my older son. He isn't into sports so I told him that he MUST be in Cubs unless he finds another activity that is just as rewarding in the long haul. Needless to say he is still in Cubs and has grown to LOVE it. I wouldn't have it any other way and intend to do the same with my younger son as he enters school age and my daughter with girl scouts. Good work Grandma!!! Stick to your guns!
2007-09-20 09:44:02 · answer #1 · answered by Kishauna_P 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Like others have said--sports are a great way to get kids out there. It also takes up a lot of his energy and time so he'll spend less time bugging his other brothers. There's also swimming lessons. Schools normally have clubs that kids can enter in. Why not ask him what he would like to do? I'm sure he can come up with something. Then, offer to pay whatever it is to enroll him in the activity. Best of Luck!
2007-09-20 09:43:45 · answer #2 · answered by .vato. 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm with Susie X, Karate or Judo teaches self discipline, self defence as well as being a great way to keep fit. They meet all sorts of different people and have achievable goals to reach. It is both an individual sport but also includes team work so they get the best of both worlds. Equipment is pretty inexpensive too, no designer trainers/kit/football boots etc to buy either!
2007-09-20 09:46:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
How about a sports club or a self defence club all young boys love martial arts and it really boosts their self esteem and confidence. If he's into art or reading I'm sure there are groups for those in your area. Or maybe a drama club.
In my area there is a youth club that caters for ages seven and above (they're broken down into groups by their ages) and about twice a week they meet up in the centre and play board games, sports, just hangout and talk with their friends and then watch a video before going home. All supervised of course.
Finally you should go to the local library they usually have details of all activities going on in the area. Good luck.
2007-09-20 12:22:14 · answer #4 · answered by tynker 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm confused - what does designer clothes have to do with independence or cub scouts? Are the children in your custody? Your said grandchildren, which makes me think this is a question for the parents to ask, unless you've taken custody of them. I don't understand why an 8 year old child (only second or third grade, right?) would need "independence" from his family/parents. That seems very odd to me. He's 8...
My kids are enrolled in sports classes, and I would never force them to go to cubs or anything else they did not enjoy, no matter how much of a break it may give me. They are required to finish a season once started, but are free to explore the sports (or other activities) they find enjoyable. Has anyone asked the 8 year old what sport/activity he would like to sign up for?
2007-09-20 11:18:12 · answer #5 · answered by not'cho_average_soccermom 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I wouldnt make my kids go to anything unless they showed an interest but I do encourage them. There are many activities your grandson could go to my 8 year old currenlty goes to boys brigade, football practise and swimming lessons. My ten year old has shown interest in scouts and currenlty goes to swimming and also a youth club and my 4 year old goes to a sunday club within the church. I think it is important for kids to mix in different settings and get structured activities and to encourage exercise rather than sitting watching tv or playing computer games. There are also trampolining classes and various other groups and clubs, try your local community centre and school to see what is available. Swimming I feel is very important from a safety point of view as well as general fitness.
2007-09-21 13:56:57 · answer #6 · answered by misspinkkitten1978 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sports clubs are probably the way to go - then he will have something he can participate in with other local boys his age. Football, Rugby, Basketball, Tennis, Marshall Arts?
There are loads of options out there, discuss his favourite sports with him and go from there......
2007-09-20 09:41:43 · answer #7 · answered by Em x 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried looking into local sporting teams? Soccer, Little League, etc? That sounds like it would be a great way to let out some of that energy he seems to have.
2007-09-20 09:38:13 · answer #8 · answered by Gypsy 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Karate is a good suggestion! Or similar martial arts. How about football club? All the lads I know go to that!
2007-09-20 09:41:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
my parents did not allow cubs ethier they did not like the over night trips and things. They were concerned about pervets trying to hurt the boys. I guess they caught one around the time i was able to go.
I went into things that i could come home that day Marital arts, swimming, gymnastics, music ( I played paino my brother the drums) My brother did tennis and baseball. We did all of these at different times and we had to commit to a certain time frame then we could quit if we liked.
I ended up really liking marital arts and did that through highschool i even taught younger kids
2007-09-20 12:01:58 · answer #10 · answered by Big Daddy R 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋