How do you raise an open child?

Question

I love my parents very much and as parents go we are close, but I have never been very open with them. In highschool they had to deduce who i was dating. They did not know when i lost my virginity. I did not tell them when i had problems in college. I eloped and did not tell them i was married (out of fear) for a few months. I am working now that i have a child on being more open with them. How do I teach my daughter to be open and honest with me.

Answer 1

I have done the same thing. First I would say don't make her afraid of the topics that might come up. When I was younger my mother made comments that she thought were funny but they really made me afraid to talk to her because I thought she would get upset. Its all about what you say and how you say it. Teasing is not always a good thing either. When you and your daughter get to that stage in her life, all you can do is INFORM her, and let her know that you trust her but don't be so lineant that she doesn't know right from wrong.

Answer 2

By being open and honest with her (age appropriate of course). The best way to have a good relationship with your child is to start from the beginning and let her know she can always come to you. Raise her to know that no matter what, you won't freak out and will try to have an open mind about her problems.

Mindi

Answer 3

Start from the earliest possible time to develop trust with your child. Be open with her about your imperfections (in appropriate ways) and assure her that you accept and love her, no matter what. Some openness issues have to do with personality as well--some of us naturally are more secretive than others. If you know this is part of your daughter's personality, develop the habit of staying in contact and having conversations about lots of different things she is doing while she is young, and keep it up as she grows. Give her the time to open up to you--sometimes it can't happen in just a few minutes' talk, but it can if she knows you are willing to put the necessary time into it and into your relationship. Show her that you are a good listener.

Answer 4

Keep the lines of communication open. Ask questions and if the answers are not what you want to hear, don't overreact. Always keep it real. Don't sugar coat things. Be a parent 1st and a friend 2nd. Allow your child to be themselves...within reason. And encourage her, motivate and support her decisions. Give advice without telling her what to do.

Good Luck!!

Answer 5

The best way to teach your child to be open and honest with you, is to be open and honest with them, and do not judge them when they DO come to you with something, show understanding no matter how infuriating something they say is, and don't pry or else they will just clam up, the easier you make it for them to realize that no matter what they say or do, they will still have your unconditional love the easier it will be for them to tell you whats going on in their lives. If you engage them in conversation about their lives, talk to them about what they are passionate about, see what makes them tick, you are well on your way to forging a strong relationship with your children and they will feel more comfortable coming to you about things that most children might find hard to talk to their parents about. I hope this helps.

Answer 6

you got to share everything with her/him. if you want to raise an open and honest child you got to always be open and honest with them. Also when they are young don'r over react to situations that they get themselves into if they see that you aren't completly mad over something they have done in the future they will be less afraid to come to you. Always tell your child they can come to you for any reason and don't be afraid you would rather help them then hurt them. Me and my mom were bestfriends, still are only because she didn't have a nervous breakdown when I messed up or did stupid stuff. You got to be a mom when its time to be a mom but its also ok to be their friend too.

Answer 7

Just be very understanding and approachable - you can offer suggestions, but have to be very open-minded. I am very open with my Mom, BUT I didn't tell her when I lost my virginity. I was responsible and went on the pill several months in advance. I think sometimes kids can offer too much information sometimes and it can freak a parent out.
Hope this helps!

Answer 8

Be honest and open with her to the degree that she is mature enough to understand it. Openness and respect fosters her ability to be that way with you. My own mother told me how she gave up her first baby to adoption. I never thought it was bad or secretive- she told me how it made her sad but that she felt it was the right thing to do. Being open with me about her life and decisions made it so I felt like I could do the same.

P.S. I met that brother who had been given up. He found us through a private eye- and his mom is a wonderful mom and my mom cried and told her thank you, that she was exactly what she prayed for for her son. My life is very full and open because of my mom's strength and bravery.

Answer 9

How to raise your child to be open with you is to show her that you will be there for her at all times. Allow yourself to share conversations and communicate to her as much as you can. Once you build trust, she will confide in you and be open to anything. Be her friend from the get go as well as a mother!

Answer 10

BE OPEN AND HONEST WITH HER!!!! Most parents shelter their ''babies'' from the ugly mean world but feed her truth and reality in small doses, and on her level ALWAYS ask questions at the same time, and show her that her opinion and feelings matter.... be her friend when it comes to that.