my fiancee left me. can someone that has gone through this or something similiar to this help me or give me advice?
2007-09-19 08:01:00 · 8 answers · asked by --ever-after-him-- 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
thank you everyone! i could not possibly choose a best answer, because each of you helped in a different way.
2007-09-19 14:20:10 · update #1
im so sorry, what happened?
i went through something similar.
i was with a guy for 2 years, i really loved him
and well we broke up, because of bad circumstances.
and its really hard, i have been depressed for along time over it.
the best advice is, not too look at the past but look towards the future. dont go out and try to date other people, (everyone suggests that) but you'll end up having more akward situations that good ones. plus you need to make sure your over him before going out with anyone else.
try not to think about him, especially thinking about good things about him. try to think about the bad things. like how much of a jerk he was for doing that to you.
the basic things that happen to you after you go through a breakup are denial, anger, depression, then recovery comes.
its going to be really hard and lonely but try to do things with your time. go get a make over, feel good about yourself. take up a hobby try not to have time where you can sit and think about it.
i found that listening to songs that related to my situation made me feel better, i cried sometimes but its good to get it all out. (heres some good ones: john waite - missing you, tony rich project - nobody knows it, jacks mannequin -rescued and babyface - when can i see you again)
someone once told me "think of your life as you being in a car, the rear veiw mirror is your past, if you look into it too long you will crash, but its important to look back on it every now in then."
im so sorry. you dont need him.
good luck =]
2007-09-19 08:22:02 · answer #1 · answered by surfingtosaturn 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
First, many big virtual hugs- secondly, this is something many of us go through in life- losing the love of our life. But one thing I realized over the past 40 yrs is that things happen for a reason, if this was meant to be,it would be but it isn't and it is better for him to go now than after marriage, after having kids, AFTER the fact.
There was life before him, and there will be life after him. If he can walk away that easily then he didn't deserve you to begin with, you will find someone else even better and this one will appreciate you for YOU and take you under his wing for the rest of his life, I know because I found that person for me. And it happens when you least expect it. It is a difficult transition, a re-adjustment, reminders will be there, but you will get through it and move on. This will only make you stronger, though now you may feel at your weakest but as anything, this too shall pass.
2007-09-19 16:30:06 · answer #2 · answered by brandy2007 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Breath! Thank your lucky stars this happened before you married him or had children or what ever else. Sweet heart it is painful and you hate everything he stands for. You have to pick your self back up and look the world and him in the face and go on. You will sit back and laugh your *** off down the road how dumb this all is. But belive me there are more fish out there and someone who is going to be great for you. Try church, laundry mats, city gatherings, parks, work any where. There is a reason for everything! Good luck and keep your head up!
2007-09-19 15:13:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
been there done that lived through it
that which does not kill us only makes us stronger
Better that the fiancee left Before it was a Spouse
I know you are hurting and it will for awhile
go at it one day one minute at a time
suddenly you will realise that you are lucky that that Loser is out of your life
you deserve better and that person is out there
sorry that u are hurting now
2007-09-19 15:10:42 · answer #4 · answered by caretaker 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ahh babe, that's so sad. l loved someone with all my heart, and he left- because- you can love someone till your heart breaks- but you cant make them love you back. It wasn't meant to be- like mine wasn't, things will get better honey, talk to friends and family- don't sit thinking of all the good things- remember the bad too- that will help you let go. You will find happiness- just take a little time out with friends- that will help. see Dr about it, he may help with short term medication.l wish you love and future happiness. Love Jo xx
2007-09-23 00:02:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Be thankful that it happened before you got married and had kids. It will hurt for a while, but you will find your perfect soul - try to keep busy only time will help. Good luck - every pot has a cover and yours will come.
2007-09-19 15:39:31 · answer #6 · answered by Sirena 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Been there. Unfortunately only time can heal this wound. Try to keep busy and surround yourself with friends and family. You just have to go through thr grieving process to feel better. Good luck :-)
2007-09-19 15:12:23 · answer #7 · answered by Angelbunny17 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes the same thing just happened to me but a little different situation. what I am doing is just trying to keep busy doing other things and just letting things calm down for a while.today would of been our third year together and i am being stubborn and jealous I guess
2007-09-19 15:11:20 · answer #8 · answered by pjmatt64 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋