We are getting married next July, doing most of the planning and paying for the wedding ourselves. Any advice of what you are glad you did at your wedding, things you would change, or just general advice for us? Or even things you have seen going to other peoples weddings that you loved or hated? Ideas!!! :)
2007-09-19 05:54:16 · 31 answers · asked by Crystal D 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Thank you so much for all you answers, I see that photography is the most important over all. I am glad I asked cause I do modeling on the side and was going to use a new photographer to weddings, love her work with me, but she hasn't done weddings before, she is doing it for free so she can use it for her portfolio. What do you think of that?
Our wedding is July 27, 2008, already purchased the dress, and the venue. Ceremony on a large floating dock, and reception upstairs of the boathouse.
2007-09-19 06:33:35 · update #1
KISS – Keep it simple stupid.
This is my advice I can give you, if you’re paying for your own Wedding then more power to you and your fiancée, but always remember you guests.
Too many people get hang up on the perfect Wedding and just so you know “the less you expect to happen the better off you will be”. You can plan to avoid the usual generic mishaps, but believe me when I say, “things will happen not matter what you do or avoid”
Plan for the Wedding, but when that day comes let your expectations go, everyone has a job to do and they will do their best to give you that day in the spotlight, so if something doesn’t come out just right, get over it and let someone else handle it in the best way they can. It’s supposed to be your day to shine not a day to argue with (people) the help.
I have come across quite a few weddings and the best ones are the ones that put guests first thinking of their limitations. i.e. family and friends with kids. Attire – formal or informal. Distance – traveling and hotel stay. Think of all the memories and think of all the criticisms if you don’t put your guests first.
Being perfect, having things perfect and arguing when things are not perfect is the best way for your guests to remember the mishaps and not the intended festival your wedding is supposed to be. Give in, and they will only remember good times, not the mishaps or how they were treated because you expected no children or a large party or more hugs/kisses and or being treated as a queen for a day.
Note: the fear is having a perfect party and no one showing up… to enjoy said party because you demanded too much of your guests.
Other than that "Have FUN!!!"
2007-09-19 06:00:29 · answer #1 · answered by The truth 3 · 0⤊ 7⤋
When you start shopping for dresses do not tell them your real date. I did not know this and even though I ordered my dress 8 months in advance, they did not give it to me until a month before the wedding.
Make sure you see the photographers work. We saw work from the much recoommended studio and not from the specific photographer. Big mistake! I cried when I saw our pictures! They were horrible!
On the subject of pictures, make sure you have a friend or relative that wont mind using your camera to take pictures. We did this and it was nice to have pictures to look at the next day.
I also got married in July and had silk flowers. I was so happy I did! I did not have to worry about the flowers wilting in the heat and it was much cheaper than real flowers. Since they were silk, I can keep them forever. I have some of the bridesmaid bouquets on my mantel. I ordered from silkspecialites.com. Nobody even knew they were silk!
We did things our way. It didnt matter what the tradition was or what people thought. Everyone commented that our wedding was the most fun they had been too. It was probably because it wasn't exactly the same as every other wedding!
I used the knot.com a lot! It was easy to budget and keep track of information such as address on there. The message boards are great places to get ideas. Lots of girls have profiles with pictures from their weddings.
Good luck!
2007-09-19 06:11:40 · answer #2 · answered by Pumpkin 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
We just went to a wedding that was so nice. The reception was held at a bed and breakfast place that had a large party
room, and the grounds were beautiful for the before dinner
appetizer, drinks, and "waiting for the arrival of the bridal party" time. They had a sit down dinner. The place cards had a question on the back of them like "What is the bride's favorite candy?" and " What is the name of the groom's dog?"
A lot of people didn't know each other, so it was a way for us to chat amongst ourselves while searching the answers to the questions. Then the tables had the answers to the question on a cute little card stand, and we knew where to sit.
Plus we had a conversation starter, because the cute little card had a few sentences about the question.
Another thing I liked was the bridesmaids dresses--black, street length, plain. They had scoop necks, covered buttons up the back, and pockets! All the bridesmaids can wear them again. They had wide royal blue sashes for the wedding, and their fresh garden flower bouquets had the same blue ribbon. Very nice. The groomsmen wore
vests and ties in the same blue. Looked great.
The black and white wedding is a good look. Another wedding we went to had the bridesmaids in black, carrying red bouquets. The bride had a mostly white bouquet, with a few red roses, The men wore black suits with red ties, except the groom, who had a white tie. The mothers of the bride and groom wore different black and white print dresses.
Really nice looking.
2007-09-19 06:11:33 · answer #3 · answered by M S 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
We got married in January and one way I saved money was that I had a close friend make my dress. It cost about $200 total and it was beautiful. You could try to do something like that because then you don't have to pay for a dress which will most likely need to be altered to fit perfectly. I would also recommend trying to find a place to have the ceremony/reception that doesn't cost much. Our ceremony was extremely small but we planned a reception afterwards. We had our reception at my parents' house so it didn't cost a thing and then we were able to hire a planner to decorate so it didn't look as much like a house. Another way we saved money was that we had a friend that was a DJ and he did music for free as our gift. My friend is a cosmetologist and she did my hair and make up for a gift. I also had my mom's friend custom design our jewelry--it was perfect! A good friend of ours also made our cake and it was amazing. So basically, try to utilize the talents and abilities of people you know and see how they can help. Most of our budget was spent on professional photography and I am so glad! I love my album and wedding video... it's my favorite thing and a wonderful way to remember our day! Good luck, being married is great!!
2007-09-19 06:07:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
An idea I liked when I attended a wedding is that there were disposable cameras on each table so we could all take pictures. A few of the pictures taken with the cameras were then mailed with the thank you cards which was a nice gesture and a good keepsake from the wedding.
I wouldn't spend too much on flowers. I've never remembered the flowers at anyone's wedding. The only decoration I remember from a wedding is a winter wedding and they had a x-mas tree on each side of the platform where the ceremony was with white lights draped on them. It was appropriate for the season and very pretty for the evening wedding. That I remember, but none of the flowers.
2007-09-19 06:10:18 · answer #5 · answered by Hsook 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
OMG...did we spend a ridiculous amount of money on people to attend our reception and half did not show up. You know some people have no home training. I think we only received maybe a third of RSVP's and I can't count the amount of money we wasted on the no shows. Just to rent the ballroom was $3000. Then it was like $150 per couple to eat. Another 2,000 for open bar. We did the big white wedding and the huge reception. I so regret it. As a new couple we could have used that money as a down payment on a new house for us. Or had a nice honeymoon instead of a half baked one due to the money we had to spend on people who don't care enough to show up or the ones who show up and didn't have the common courtesy to bring a wedding gift. I looked at these people I so wanted to share my day with and thought to myself...what a waste! I should have kept it small and just special family and friends like I started out to do. Kept things simple yet still elegant. And I suggest the same to you. Good luck.
2007-09-19 06:07:13 · answer #6 · answered by mrslucke 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Here are a few unique ideas we're using in our wedding:
1. (my favorite!) For my "something blue" I'm embroidering "Mrs. Black, 10/18/08" in baby blue on one of the inside layers of my dress. I'm actually having it embroidered on a seperate piece of the dress fabric, and having it sewn on so that I can remove it later.
2. Have the wedding and reception in the same place to cut down on transportation costs and confusing directions for guests.
3. Use silk flowers for your bouquet and your bridesmaids, then go to Kroger or similar grocery store with a floral department for the boutoniers and corsages...you could save hundreds!
4. DIY your invites. Not only can you save money, but you can personalize them much more than any store-bought or invites you get online.
5. Skip the favors, or jus put cute bowls of candy on each table...half the guests leave them there anyway!
6. Use candles as centerpieces (if allowed by your venue). They're relatively cheap if you get them at a wholesale or factory direct place, and candle light adds such ambiance!
7. Don't stress out, even though I know you will! Delegate duties to other people...you'll probably be bombarded with offers to help. Use them!
8. Remember WHY you're getting married! Try not to get caught up in the WEDDING so much that you forget about the MARRIAGE!
9. Have a ton of fun and enjoy the day! And remember, it IS only a day!
Congrats and good luck!
2007-09-19 06:05:19 · answer #7 · answered by Mrs.10/18/08 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I just got married a week ago and we had an outside wedding which I was kind of iffy about to begin with and it rained! It cleared up but the ground was mushy so my bridesmaids had a hard time walking in their heels, so watch out for outdoor weddings! Plus our minister was lost and was a few minutes late so make sure everyone knows where they are going if you're getting married somewhere unfamiliar. Also, I wouldnt go overboard with the food, I thought we needed to have tons and tons to accomodate everyone but we all pretty much just picked at it and spent most of the time talking so we had alot of food leftover. Hope this helps and congrats!!
2007-09-19 06:15:12 · answer #8 · answered by must<3dogs 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well I just got married just under a month ago and we only spent $2,000 on everything (my parents spent like maybe $500 on somethings because they wanted to help out). But we did is we had out friends and family help out. My husband's grandma made out cake, our friend was our DJ at our reception, we had friends sing at our wedding...and all of this we asked them to do as their wedding gift to us because then we didn't have to pay them. Some other things were finding my dress on sale ($99), pictures done by friends as a wedding gift, and many more things. We did a simple but fun and elegant wedding. We tried to get sales on everything and we cut cost wherever possible. We had help from our friends and family and nothing went wrong the day of the wedding...it was perfect. Most importantly just enjoy planning, enjoy the big day, and enjoy your honeymoon (which you don't have to spend thousands on...hubby and I stayed two nights a hotel a few town away and just relaxed)
Congrats!
2007-09-19 06:08:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I recently got married and we paid for our own wedding also but one of the things I loved was that set cameras in every table, our guest were able to capture moment that the photographer didn't (alot of funny pictures). We also gave out bottle openers that were a key with a heart meaning "key to my heart" All of our guest loved them. Also the knot.com is a great website that help me with alot of ideas and also helps you manage and budget your wedding. You could also creat a save the date web page with the info as how you both met, how did he propose and in regards to the wedding, alot of people thought it was so neat. Also make sure you over invite for the reception, which we did and it worked out great (even thought alot of people RSVP for the reception, they still dont show up until the dance and those plate could get really expensive.) Good luck with your planning and have an extra budget for last minute things.
2007-09-19 06:26:44 · answer #10 · answered by Mary J 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
what's your budget? and how many people?
We paid for our own wedding! We are young fun loving, and have a crazy good time all the time. We had a beautiful ceremony in a church, and then went to my mom's house where she had 4 acres of land. We set up a tent, and had a dance floor, we had tables and chairs for all the guest. We had a bon fire type of evening. It was the best celebration of us. And no body didn't have a great time! Great grandma was pleased... and so was my 4 year old niece. We ended up spending under 4 thousand! And had a great time. For food we just did a buffet! We didn't have that many left overs, because people picked at it all night!
2007-09-19 06:01:25 · answer #11 · answered by mommak071005 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋