help my dad refuses to accept my new fiance'?

Question

ok my dad is really racist and before you attack me notice i said my dad( not me) im white and my boyfriend is black my dad wont even talk to me now all he says is "i cant believe your living with a F*cking N*gger!" and i get so mad every time that word comes out of his mouth that i cant even stand to look at him!!!! the thing is were getting married soon and i really want my dad to walk me down the isle. how can i get my dad to get to know my boyfriend as a person instead of a color before the wedding?

Answer 1

As people get older its harder for them to change their mind about anything.. They get set in their ways , so to speak. Acually its neuro chemistry but thats besides the point. =) I know its not the answer you were looking for but sometimes you have to accept people for who they are, even if its a bigoted ****. You might as well ask him to grow a 3rd arm.

I would recommend doing the wedding without him. I know its not ideal but its prolly the best thing to do.

By the way, how does your boyfriends parents feel about you?

Answer 2

If he is that bigoted I don't think there is any hope of changin his mind for your wedding. You may have to come to terms with the fact that he won't be there to walk you down the aisle. You have to decide if you can live with the fact that he may never accept your husband to be or your children that you may one day have. Definitely do not allow him to talk like that about your finace. I wouldn't!

It's very sad when a parent lets the color of someones skin get int he way of their childs happiness. I hope it works out for you.

Answer 3

You can't make you dad accept your fiance and if he is going to keep being like you have described, he is not worth your effort. Tell him you want him to be there for you and be happy for you but if he is not willing to co-operate then it's his loss and I don't know why you would want someone so horrible to be part of your wedding. It will be his loss so don't lose sleep over him.