Ok here goes. there is this guy who i find attractive and he also finds me very attractive. He is not my boyfriend and we have never dated. He keeps giving me advances and i think he wants to have sex with me. I am a virgin. I am also very busy and i dont think i have time to maintain a man. Would i get emotionally hurt if we have sex continually if he isnt in a relationship with me? Or would it be fun to just have sex without commitment?. Also is this a good way for me to loose my virginity?
2007-09-19 05:07:40 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No, iti sn't a good way to lose your virginity. You will feel so regretful that you didn't lose it with someone who treasures you...and the "friends with benefits" thing just never works out well because someone (usually the woman) wants it to develop into something much more, and she ends up hurt when it doesn't. I understand busy, believe me, but make time in your life to share yourself with others, and your rewards will be very worthwhile. Best wishes....
2007-09-19 05:14:50 · answer #1 · answered by melouofs 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you asking this? Only you would know if you'd get hurt or not.
Personally, I think it's impossible for a girl to be f*ck buddies with a guy and NOT get emotionally attached. That's just how we are when it comes to sex - emotional. So if I were to give you my advice, I would say don't do it.
Sex is only good when it's with someone you care for, who also cares about you. Merely "finding him attractive" is not enough. And since you're a virgin, you've yet to experience the effects of intercourse, both during and after. And it's the 'after' that I'm worried about with you.
Once it's all said and done, you're going to wish you'd have saved yourself for someone you truly have feelings for. So if you're very busy like you say, then just wait until you find someone you actually want to fit into your schedule. Hope this helps.
2007-09-19 05:16:05 · answer #2 · answered by Bella 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in my opinion i dont think there is a good or bad way to lose ur virginity(As long as its not at the back seat of his car- thats shows no self respect) people say the 1st time should be perfect with the one that u love. yeah i'm sure thats nice coz it would leave u pleasent memories but if u want to have sex and u r of age, u feel like u can handle it emotionally and u r safe go for it. some people can handle this kind of arrangement and if you think u can have sex with a boy without being commited to him then by all means
2007-09-19 05:17:41 · answer #3 · answered by snowflakes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he know you are a virgin? You really want to just casually give your virginity away? You will be attracted to someone else. That person should be somebody you care about and love. This memory will stay with you the rest of your life. GOD, let it be a good memory. 'Cause soon enough that's all your virginity will be . . . a memory. Once it's gone you can't get it back and you might want it back if you give it to this guy. He's probably bragging about it already to his buddies. NO IT'S NOT A GOOD WAY TO LOOSE YOUR VIRGINITY!
2007-09-19 05:22:58 · answer #4 · answered by shellshell 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly its best with someone your comfy with and possibly love...but at the same time...you need to do what feels right for you. I lost mine to a friends older brother. We werent in a relationship....never was before or after...and we kinda became "buddies" it was fun and I felt comfy with him. AND Most importantly I trusted him to listen to me when I say it hurts...cuz you will not enjoy it at first. But in a since, now that Im married and older...I wish I had of waited. But again, it could have been worse too. Ask yourself why do you suppose he isnt dating you? Does he see you as only a screw? Thats not good if so. You need to make this choice. Good luck and take a towel your first time....or have something handy. You will get your cherry popped and bleed everywhere once you are done and stand up again.
2007-09-19 05:17:17 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust me this is not a good way to loose ur v-card because u are going to get emotionally attached and he won't even be bothered after that he will move on and you will feel like he belongs to u i don't want u to get hurt take this from my experience please after you give him the good and u arent in a relationship he will for get about u not all the time but most of the time men are pigs!
2007-09-19 05:19:48 · answer #6 · answered by Lady Singletary 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends whether it feels right when you are with him, and how highly you value you're virginity. My advise would be to get him alone and try to talk with him for as long as possible. Make it clear that you don't want sex that night (but maybe another night). If he wants any kind of commitment, he'll respect that in you. If he comes on to you anyway then he only wants sex. I think that you'll have to lose it anyway sometime but don't rush into anything you're even a little unsure about.
good luck :-)
2007-09-19 05:17:11 · answer #7 · answered by Chewyconor 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off only do it if it is a man you want to remember for the rest of your life, if he is the man you will tell your children about. Having casual sex is great, as long as your experienced and emotionally strong enough to handle it. Loosing your virginity via casual sex is so wrong....not saying you should wait till prom night like most females on this sight lost theirs. It does not matter if you have never dated, except you dont really know him. If I flirt with you, will you have sex with me........NO because you dont know me from just flirting with you. Men of any post puberty age just want sex first and formost from someone they just met.....it is not till we get to know a woman that we really want a relationship....so if you give it up.....no relationship will happen.....
2007-09-19 05:39:40 · answer #8 · answered by donniez369 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well...how old are you? if you are at least 16, then..yeah, why not go for it. especiallly if you don't have the time for a boyfriend, why not enjoy the thrill of being in lust. but if you are like 13, 14..you've got plenty of time and shouldn't even be thinking about sex at such a young age. just one piece of advice: you CAN get pregnant the very first time you do it, even if he pulls out before he finishes, and I got pregant while on the birth control pill...so NOTHING is 100% effective so you should just keep that in the back of your mind while thinking about losing your virginity. it would suck to get pregnant by a guy who was just supposed to be a hook up. i say wait until you are in love and ready for a relationship ,but it's up to you so that's my advice.
2007-09-19 05:16:25 · answer #9 · answered by phlygirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A majority of people saying to wait until you are with someone you love, etc...probably aren't still with the person they lost their virginity to. I think I would prefer to lose my virginity the way you are talking about- with someone you care about but aren't seriously involved with.
You sound pretty mature about what you want and don't want. It is all up to you if it is okay or not and if you are going to feel comfortable being naked with this person and not having a relationship later. Good luck with whatever you decide!
2007-09-19 05:23:58 · answer #10 · answered by europa312 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋