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my 9 yr old daughter wants to come home after school and stay by herself,it is only for 2 hours is this a good idea or not,she attends daycare and has several friends that stay by themselves?

2007-09-19 04:12:21 · 17 answers · asked by amy m 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting Parenting

17 answers

In my state, it is not legal to have kids under 12 by themselves, unsupervised.
I tried this and they are just not responsible enough to have their key and etc.
It it did not work for me.

2007-09-19 04:20:10 · answer #1 · answered by BonesofaTeacher 7 · 2 0

I don't think that it would be a good idea for her to just start staying home alone on her own. Perhaps, you could start allowing her to stay inside the house alone while you are outside doing yard work or running a quick errand to the store, gas station, etc. over time. But, nine years old is pretty young, no matter how mature your daughter may be for her age. Also, there are many states where you are not allowed to even leave your child alone until 12 years old. I would certainly not worry about what other parents do or don't do with this specific situation. Also, what does your gut instinct tell you? Your daughter should learn other important things about staying home alone too, and as she becomes proficient with these things, you may feel more secure in allowing her to be alone at the house (i.e. keeping the doors locked, not answering the phone unless she recognizes the number, not answering the door for anyone, knowing how to contact the emergency numbers, how to handle making basic food items, etc.) Also, consider the possibility of something strange happening. I live in the quietest little town, and it literally had one of the lowest crime rates in the state. But, just recently, some random home robberies started a month ago. I'm not saying this to scare you, but to remember the saying....better safe than sorry. Especially with your most precious value of all - your child. Of course, she should learn to be home alone as she gets older, but I suggest that a gradual process would be best in making both of you prepared and ready for this change. Hope this helps!

2007-09-19 04:47:08 · answer #2 · answered by christina52206 1 · 1 0

Not legal or safe and it will be scary. She is too young to understand all the dangers or to make the decisions that will be made. Think about a dark winter afternoon when she is alone in the house and hears a noise or the power goes out and she is alone in the dark on a stormy afternoon. Also she might not know what to do in case of fire, flood, bad nosebleed that won't stop or other emergency.
My brother's children that were 17, 15, 13, 11 were home alone one cold winter night when there was an electrical fire in the basement. Three of them died in the fire but at least the parents knew it wasn't because the kids weren't old enough. Think how much worse they would have felt if the kids were 6-7 years younger wondering if they could have been saved with an adult present.

2007-09-19 04:20:52 · answer #3 · answered by shipwreck 7 · 1 0

My 11 yr old son started middle school this year.. and this is the first year that he got a key tot he house. It wasn't that I didn't trust him... I just dont trust everyone else. considering she is a girl.. I would have to say NO. I am sure she is responsible and would be fine by herself, but it is not her that you have to worry about.

considering you had to ask for an opinion on the subject, I personally think that you are not ready to let her stay by herself. Wait until middle school...

If the child has a problem with it.. just explain to her that it is not her that you don't trust it is everyone else.

2007-09-19 04:23:26 · answer #4 · answered by Sunshine_Diva 4 · 1 0

Not a parent, but I have a 9 year old baby sister and I don't think she's mature enough to stay by herself even for an hour. When I was a kid (I'm 27 now) I didn't stay by myself until I was 13.

2007-09-19 04:24:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

o boy. I am having the same problem with my 9 year old daughter. She wants to come home after school too, but my husband and I are at work. So far I havent let her. I feel to nervous about it. I'll have to check back and hear all the opinions on this one. I guess it's just that age when they want their independence.

2007-09-19 04:22:50 · answer #6 · answered by Denise Perez 2 · 1 0

I struggled with the same thing. If anything happens to your child in those 2 hours (aside from the horror of THAT) YOU can be sent to prison for neglect. Check with your state's law regarding what age is ok- while I felt (and feel) my son is mature enough to be alone, I will wait until Virginia's age of 12 is met.

2007-09-19 04:21:46 · answer #7 · answered by jmd72inva 6 · 2 0

check your state laws out before deciding because that has to be followed first.
But from where I'm sitting my nine year old could handle about a half hour while I walked the dogs and that was about it there are just too many details that a nine year old isn't ready for. although I do understand she doesn't want to be the old kid at daycare maybe find her another program?

2007-09-19 04:40:09 · answer #8 · answered by pbj 2 · 1 0

First have your daughter clarify to the girl that she and the girl could produce different acquaintances . Its solid to offer different acquaintances which you will confer with, have her clarify. tell your daughter to tell the girl enable's have a sparkling acquaintances race. Or she ought to tell the girl as we talk i will spend time with so and so and you spend time with different so and so, then on Thursday you and that i will spend time mutually. If that does'nt paintings via all skill talk to the mummy. If that does'nt paintings in line with threat you and your daughter and the different mom and her daughter could have an improtu assembly on the bus end after countless the student site visitors has died down. Have your daughter tell what's being achieved and how it makes her sense in front of the two one in each and every of them. via the mothers reaction you will comprehend a thank you to take it from there.

2016-12-17 05:10:07 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

even if she is responsible, i don't know if that's safe. someone could see her come home alone every day. i'm 21 now, but i didn't get to be home alone after school until i was 12. daycare is good, because she can socialize. is there a reason she doesn't want to be at daycare?

2007-09-19 04:25:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

I stayed at home when i was 10 years old and it was for 1 hour and 45 minutes. but i walked home from school. my mom was a great parent but she worried just like you. but i would always have to call her when i got home, and i would have to do my homework or if my friends were home i would go up the street to play with them. but these days it seems like people are more weirder. but i loved going home. and if something went wrong i would call her. its really up to you, i jsu though you could hear ir from me since i have been through. i would say try it for a couple or days and if she doesn't follow your rule, call it off. but it is not against the law. just as long as it is only 2 hours. not 4.

2007-09-19 04:32:11 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0 2

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