My ex husband won't give our bipolar son his medication....?

Question

....and I'm at the end of my rope.

I have our son 4-5 days a week and he has him 2-3 days a week ("joint" custody), and he decided to stop giving him his medication without discussing it with me. He told our son he was out of pills, but I think he was just too damn lazy to call the pharmacy to reorder them.

Then he said that he doesn't need them because he hasn't seen any problems out of him - well duh - HE'S BEEN ON MEDICATION UP UNTIL NOW!!!

So now my son comes to my house, has not been on his meds, refuses to take them b/c his dad said he doesn't have to anymore, and begins the bipolar cycle again. He started the nasty attitude this morning so I'm on pins and needles and scared that we're in for another roller coaster ride.

What do I do? I need help calming down & collecting thoughts before I confront his father this afternoon.

Answer 1

I have heard of cases of this. My sons doc was worried my ex wasn't going to give him his meds and told me he had a patient who won a case of child abuse easily when her ex wouldn't give her son his meds. I would talk with your ex before going this route however because you will be putting your son in the middle of it. See if your ex is willing to talk with your sons doc about the importance that they be given. I know with the trileptal my son is on, he could have seizures if not given appropriately. Also, if he's not willing to budge and you have to go through the courts, talk to his doc about the risks of his meds being given inconsistently. You may have to consider taking him off them while things get sorted out. Only try working things out nice for your sons sake, if your ex doesn't want to budge go to the courts. It's too important not to.

Answer 2

Make him realize that in doing so he is only damaging your son and further progressing the problem. It's hard enough to keep bi-polar patients on meds as often times they come to just decide they don't need them. The patients and the doctors both struggle with this fact. What your ex is doing is just pure neglect. Make him realize that in doing so and allowing this behavior in your son that it can lead the boy down a path of progressive outlandish behavior and lead him into depression and worse. If he further persists with this attitude towards your sons medication I would take it up with someone, at the least, tell the person treating your son and come up with a plan of action.

Agreed, lawyer is a damn fine course of action here.

Answer 3

You should not have to confront the father again if this has happened. I think CPS should be involved. call your attorney ASAP and your child's doctor that prescribed the meds in the first place and let them know what is going on. You may need a different dosage to start him back up on it. Until this gets resolved I would not allow him visitation. I know it may be out of your hands. But call the cops call someone your son's mental health depends on this.
Good luck, I can only imagine the hell you must be going through.

Answer 4

if it was just a day or two he should be ok. but 2-3 days a week,sad. your ex is denying your son a normal life by telling him he does not need his medication. i don't know what was going on that your child had to be put on medication ,but where was your husband. the older your son gets the harder it is going to be to get him to take his medication. you need the support of your husband to save your son. your son can end up in jail,unemployed,in hospital or dead. i would tell my husband the doctor feels his son should be on medication and to please help you by giving him his medication. skipping meds.2-3 days a week could be very harmful to your son's health and trigger even suicide. good luck

Answer 5

How old is your child? I would call your sons doctor right away and tell him or her what is going on. If he needs to be on the medication and his father is withholding his medication he is putting your sons health in danger. Have the doctor talk with his father if necessary so he will understand how important it is that your son takes the medication every single day. If he continues not to listen talk with your lawyer.

Answer 6

You need to contact your attorney, and if necessary, take him back to court or have a Judge order him to give the kid his medication.
I worked in the behavioral health field for years, and Bipolar is nothing to mess around with. Especially not providing meds to the patient who needs them. Also, you can't just take him off them all of a sudden. It's dangerous to you as well as the child.

Answer 7

first you need to try to talk some sense into the father if he is still refusing to give the meds you may need to rethink your custody agreement and sue for full custody..i know someone who lost custody of their children because they didn't give them there meds it is called medical neglect

Answer 8

Girl, report his ___ to social services, because I'm bipolar and that ain't no joke. He could really mess that boy up not giving him his medicine. You know, men are like that. "Not my boy" "my boy don't need medication" "Nothing is wrong with my boy" . You may not be able to reason with him.

Answer 9

How ols is your son? It makes a big difference. First off let me say that kids are way to medicated in todays world, the nasty attittude? not a kid alive that doesn't act this way once in a while. Get used to it.
Most parents who medicate thier childrens personality do it to make it easier on themselves. Children are tough, thye are moody, they get hyper, they get sad, part of the growing up process.
I agree with his father take him off the meds. And work harder as his mother to provide the best environment for your child. Many of these "illnesses" can be controlled with hard work and patience. Medication should be the very last resort for kids.

Answer 10

CALL YOUR LAWYER and your pediatrician. What he is doing is CHILD ABUSE!!! If your son was diabetic and he wasn't giving him his insulin what would you do? He is probably not giving him his meds so he WILL be sick when he gets home. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE call NOW!!! The more the bas@#rd does this the worse it is for YOUR CHILD!!!!!!