My brother has been diagnosed with depression- help?

Question

He quit his job and already had some health issues, and is now only getting iller. My dad is pushing him to go out and look for work because my bro has a car and some debts he has to pay for, and we can't afford to help him (we're a fairly poor family). My bro is seeing a doctor and has been prescribed meds, but I'm wondering if urging him to go out and take on job hunting is the right thing. He says he just can't make his body do it and I'm worried that my dad's pushiness about it will only make his depression worse (dad thinks he'll help him by making him get off the couch). Problem is, my dad is from an era that doesnt think depression is such a serious sickness. He loves my bro SO much and hates to see him feeling so terrible, but I don't think he really grasps the concept of "depression" as a sickness. How can I explain this to him and convince him to lay off urging my bro to seek a job? Or is that the right thing to do? Please help!

Answer 1

your question took my interest, very close to home in 1999, I was diagnosed with depression-bi-polar, it is an illness, and not easy for someone to understand unless you're there, kind of like veterans that fought in the war we can only imagine what they did or seen but we cannot feel those emotions. Your father needs to be given phamplets or have a counselor talk to him or include him in you're brothers issues to the point where he is hands on. The good thing is you are a support to your brother right now, when you are depressed your mind and body both feel the effects, he cannot be pushed, I am sure he already feels alienated as it is because noone can understand this illness and even him, when thier is a problem it is only natural to want to fix it, this is a process, cannot be fixed right away, sometimes people with depression need more than family support, you should have him talk to a counselor, family physician, or psychiatrist, it will only be then he will realize someone understands and can help him more than he knows. I will have you in my prayers.

Answer 2

This is a very tricky answer. It is good that he is seeing a doctor. Make sure he is seeing a shrink. Also he needs to get therapy on a weekly basis.

It all depends on the severity of your brother's depression. Getting a job and working might be the best thing for him.

Or a job might be the thing that breaks his back. This is a discussion your brother needs to have with his doctor and his family.

With medication, therapy and support from you and your Dad he will be fine. Most meds will kick in around a month. Lexapro 2 weeks.

But work together as a team and the answer will present itself to you.

Answer 3

I just wanna ask the reason why your brother is acting in that way. Is it because of loss? This is very important because the main etiology is the only thing needed in diagnosing your brother's condition. I think, your bro lacks energy that's why he can't make his body work & this is a sign of depression. Please observe your brother if he manifests some of the signs & symptoms of major depression (Anhedonia or lack of pleasure, extreme sadness, over/under eating, insomnia/hypersomnia. During our lecture in psychiatric nursing, we learned that people experiencing depression shouldn't be involved in competitive or logistic activities. You said your father is pushing your brother to find a job. In my point of view, that thing is not appropiate for you brother because job hunting is a competitive one. What if your brother will really try to find a job & unfortunately, would not be able accepted or be hired, then he will become more depressed & may feel worthless. I'm not frightening you friend. I'm just stating a fact because I know that people who experience depression are prone to suicide so watch out! All you need to do is widen your understanding & explain to your dad that depression is not an easy thing to deal with.

Answer 4

Your dad needs to give the meds time to kick in and start working before he has him look for work. This should only take a max of 14 days. If the meds don't seem to be making a difference after 14 days then he needs to call the doc and let him know this.

Answer 5

Your brother is better off getting a job and facing the real world because if he stays home like an egg he will become a chicken and wont be able face the world. push him to go to work. get him to seek proffessional help with his depression.

Answer 6

listen to HurtHeart i know from personal experience where she is coming from
Dont give up on your Bro I had a family member give up on me and that really hurt
Your Dad sounds like a good bloke trying to do his best for his son (so dont give up on him either ), but he doesnt understand the problem, it not just having a bad day where you can as they say snap out of it

Answer 7

I am not a doctor so I cannot tell you specifically what to do about your brother and dad, however, I can tell you this. Have your father visit your brother's psychiatrist along with your brother so the doctor can explain what is wrong with your brother and how your dad should react to the problem.

Answer 8

Remove yourself from the picture. Let go of it because this isn't your battle, and people will not always do what you would like them to do. You need to get counseling so that you will have a place to vent about what bothers you without having to feel the need to change what you cannot.