How can I stop being like this? Ive had ENOUGH..?

Question

I can't stop being so self concious all the time. I am pretty and know this because people tell me that but there are a lot of things I see about myself I don't like. I have a small head..im really short 5'1...I hate being skinny and can't fight it as ive tried everthing to gain weight. I obsess over my height and just when I feel alright about it ill se a tall girl and wish to be like her..I feel as tho im the bad kid in my family bc my bros are both ingineers and im in highschool doing gateway because i have to work and they took all advanced in highschool andim just in applied courses and suck at math..I could go on and on..i don't have a lot of friends and didnt at all have a good highschool experience..never went to semi/proms...no bf in highschool...I dress nice but am shy..how can I stop picking on myself..I put myself down alot..

last time I had a bf is when I was 15 and he was in a different school and it only lasted a month..I like guys but am shy and tell myself theyd not be interested in someone like me..

i hate being self concious but cant beat it..

Answer 1

Girl......... you need a good dose of self-esteem.

I'm 5'3..... skinny.... used to really self conscious. (I wouldn't even look in peoples eyes, would always look down)

Now I just put on a pair of heels. I am proud to be skinny naturally (cause lots of women would love to be). And anytime I feel like I'm having a bad day I put in my RuPaul "Super Model"..... or "How do I look".

I'm proud to be me, and we all have flaws, but as long as we love ourselves, people will see us for the great person we really are. (inside as well as out)

Answer 2

It sounds to me like you feel that you are the 'odd one out' in your family and that you think you have to be like your successful siblings in order to be accepted.

Most of us know that feeling! Truly, you are not alone.

You have a few choices of what to do, but one of the best things you can do, which will make you feel a lot better immediately, is to contact a local charity you are interested in, and volunteer to do some free work for them helping others.

You will be doing something very worthwhile and meeting nice, caring people who also enjoy helping others. You will also have the chance to do somethjing really important, and you will find that when you are helping others you don't feel short or shy, you feel good :-)

And, when anyone asks what are you doing, you can talk about your charity work with pride, as you are doing something important and interesting in the world.

No matter how rich and important people are, they almost always become involved in charity work, because it is very fulfilling and because even if you have a billion dollars, you are NOT successful unless you can help others.

This might sound a little uninteresting, and if so, there are other avenues which you can walk to improve your self esteem and increase your confidence.

But that is one suggestion of a place to start which I have seen work in the life a someone I know very well.

Best wishes :-)

Answer 3

You should be thankful that you've got a pretty face. If you could only take a look at other people who are ugly and has some kind of physical defects, you would say to yourself that you are lucky to have a normal body. Do not make so much fuss over your skinny condition. Just try to improve on your weight without being chubby. Dress well and be smart. Develop your self confidence and you will attract a lot of people.

Answer 4

Well, you're not too terribly shy as you've found the nerve to ask this question here. My bet is that you're more quiet and reserved until you know people really well. Knowing that is a lot better than believing you're shy.

Start looking at the things you don't like and find ways to turn them into pluses. Like your height...I have a friend who would kill to be shorter. Something about never being able to wear heels around her husband. You'll rarely have that problem. And being skinny...enjoy being able to eat everything you want right now because it probably won't last.

And what are you good at? It may not be the same thing as your brothers. Whatever it is, find it and enjoy doing it.

Basically, find the things you like about yourself and whenever you start telling yourself "I'm not tall enough, I'm too shy, I'm too skinny..." stop yourself. Every time you find yourself thinking those thoughts replace them with new ones. "I can dance all night if I want. I like my job and I'm doing well at it." Keep telling yourself the things you like about yourself until you really believe them.

Answer 5

Maybe you should see a therapist. How old are you? If you're still in school, try going to the school counselor. They might help with your self esteem.

It's hard for people to get to like you, because your issues are pushing them away. If you can't like yourself, how can anyone else? You won't let them. And you should, because I'm sure you have a lot to offer and are a wonderful person.

Answer 6

i used to be like that. stop concentrating on the things that you are not and concentrate on your good points. Do you have a nice smile? do you make people feel good when they are around you? That is what real beauty is anyway. no what tv or magazines tell us. love yourself and treat others with kindness and respect and you'll see how people will flock to you. I know i've been there.it took me many years to stop being self concious but i finally like myself. good luck

Answer 7

You need to find some self esteem.
A guy doesnt want to be with a chick who is high maintenence.
If he has to tell you constantly that your pretty, not to short etc then he will walk the other way.
Just find it in yourself to accept who you are (counselling would help) and you will find that when you comfortable with you, the guys will start noticing.
Good Luck

Answer 8

It is all about your self-esteem. If you start to believe in yourself, and appreciate all the beautiful things you are, the self confidence will come. Start keeping track of all the positive intelligent things you do everyday, and your self-esteem will start to improve.

Answer 9

hey its ok!
dont worrie! if guys tell you your pretty then you are!
im selfconscious too but im overcomin it cuz y gf makes me feel so good.
if your shy thats ok. one day youll overcome it and find someone.