and then wants to come back home should i let him? or do i just leave him alone period? or do i let hime come back home and see if we can make it work a second time around
2007-09-18 03:34:06 · 15 answers · asked by tasha 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I think it's very easy to tell you "NO, don't take him back!" We live in a society where forgiveness is considered a weakness.
I think that when you are married you have to do everything you can to save this union for your children. If you were adamant about not taking him back, you wouldn't be here asking this question.
But pretending that this never happened, and going back to how you lived, is not the solution either.
If you are BOTH serious about creating a loving and stable home for your children, you need some kind of couples therapy. Whether it's a lay person (there are many couples counselors that will work with you on a sliding scale fee) or your clergy, you both need to get to the root issues that is harming your marriage. If after this, you feel that its not going to work, you can walk away from your marriage knowing that it was just not salvageable.
Good luck to you and God Bless you!
2007-09-18 07:14:53 · answer #1 · answered by joseygirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! Do not let him come back even though it may be one of the hardest things you do. If he wants to make it work a second time around, make him get his own place, support the kids, and go to counseling. If you let him come back without counseling, how can you be sure he won't walk out again when another woman comes along? By letting him come back (and then maybe leave again) you are only hurting yourself and the kids. If you make him prove himself first then you may have a chance at a happy life.
2007-09-18 04:02:09 · answer #2 · answered by Love being a Mom 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you think in your heart that it won't happen again then by all means...
Me personally...I wouldn't do it. That would be sending the message that he can do something horrible to you and you'll let him back...(enabling him to possibly do it again)
He should have thought about the consequences before he stepped the first foot out the door walking out on your and your children.
Keep that pretty chin up and keep moving on. He can still visit the kids!!
In the end..your the one who has to wake up next to him...it's your decision.
2007-09-18 03:52:42 · answer #3 · answered by Perennial Queen 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This same thing happened with my family while I was growing up. My dad left us for another woman, and it didn't work out for them. My mom and dad then got back together and actually remarried. My mom found out a couple of years later that my dad had been cheating on her the whole time. They divorced again. He remarried someone else and he is now divorced once again and living with another woman. Please don't let this happen to you or your children! This has really screwed up everyone's lives in my family.
2007-09-18 04:00:40 · answer #4 · answered by L D 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
youve got to try for your children and give him 1 other chance, but after that i wouldnt because him leaving like that is hurting them also and they will get used to him being gone after awhile, but i wouldnt take him back just like that i would play the game of making him suffer for a little bit, tell him your not sure what you want because he hurt you, and since hes been gone you done alot of thinking, let him sweat and id make him have a compleat check up first, to make sure he dont have something ajax wont take off. goodluck.
2007-09-18 03:49:16 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No! Because that's what he wants you to do and then he'll leave you again.
Make and deal with him thought so he could see his children-but that's up to you if you really think they should see him and you should ask the kids if they want to see him.
If they do and you know how he is stand by them all the way because he might leave again and brake their hearts
2007-09-18 14:06:11 · answer #6 · answered by savanna o 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! Been there done that. He tried the come back home and work it out and wouldn't go for an AIDS test (she was a drug user) like I asked. So that gave me a real good idea how considerate he was and where I stood in his life.
Move on with your life you are better than that.
2007-09-18 04:59:14 · answer #7 · answered by Mom of three A.R.T. 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you allow him to come back, it should be with some conditions... like counseling. I assume that you guys aren't married by the way you phrased your question. Perhaps the reasons for that are also present in his reasons for running out on you and the kids.
2007-09-18 03:44:42 · answer #8 · answered by mt75689 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't let him come straight back and that's if at all. If you want to try to work it out take it one step at a time! If you let him come straight back then he will do it again because you let him.
2007-09-18 03:43:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah he needs to come back with a court date for child support! You don't need a baby daddy like that! Who is to say he won't do it again!!!
2007-09-18 03:44:53 · answer #10 · answered by Dee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋