im not too sure we talked about it and i even picked out a ring. i havt gotten it yet im pregnant yesterday i sd lets go to vegas and he sd dont you want to hv a big wedding like you dreamed i sd i was over that and he sd what????i sd we should just elope its cheeper bc of the baby. he sd arnt your parents gonna pay? i sd no. know im not sure if he wants to get married..
2007-09-18 02:01:17 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I know you are prego. But I think that he just wants to make sure that you are going to have the wedding that you always dreamed of, baby or no baby. Not running off to Vegas to attempt to fix that. No matter what you are going to the pregnant when you get married. It is possible to plan a wedding in a few months. You might not be showing much by then (depending on your body type). Or you could get a dress that covers it, if that is what you are worried about. I don't think that he doesn't want to marry you based on the information that you gave us.
2007-09-18 03:55:56 · answer #1 · answered by betney109 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not that he doesn't want to marry you--he doesn't want to have a wedding that you'll regret. It's tradition for the bride's parents to pay for the wedding, so a lot of people still assume that when they propose, the brides parents are going to follow that tradition. I'm sure his comment about them paying for the wedding was innocent.
If your parents aren't helping out (mine didn't either), it does make it hard when you're just starting out. But, if you really have always wanted a big wedding, do your best to take a bit of time to plan it (even a month is long enough to plan a good wedding if you try real hard). A church is usually free or cheap to get married in. Or use a good friend's back yard for a wedding OR just reception area. Have everyone you know cook up the best family recipe.
Either way, if a Vegas wedding isn't what you want, you DO have options. I know people who have gotten married with under $500 and still loved their wedding and were glad they didn't just go to Vegas or the courthouse.
Good luck!
2007-09-18 02:15:19 · answer #2 · answered by April 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Your question raises so many red flags I don't know where to begin. First of all, how old are you and your guy? The way you write, I'm guessing you're pretty young with not a lot of school under you belt. Do you both have jobs? Health insurance? A way to support this baby? You need to work this out BEFORE you get married. Second, do you have a good relationship with your parents? It's hard to tell from your question why they are not helping you financially with the wedding, but I'm curious what they think of your guy. Do they have reason to disapprove of the father of your child? If so, maybe you want to solicit their input and find out why -- again, BEFORE you get married. Third, what's up with this guy's financial priorities? Does he have unlimited funds to pay for a wedding, when you both need to be setting up a household for the baby and planning for expenses? Again, it's great if he's got excellent insurance and a boatload of savings and a retirement plan, but I'm guessing that since you suggested Vegas, that money may be tight. DO NOT LEAVE FINANCES TO CHANCE!!! Money is a huge source of fights between married couples. BEFORE you get married, you need to figure out his whole financial history -- whether he's had a bankruptcy, how much he has saved, who he owes money to, whether he has ever defaulted on a loan, and how much he owes on his credit cards. If he won't share this info with you, do not marry him -- get this ironed out.
I wish you and your baby the best - be careful.
2007-09-18 03:16:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he wants the big wedding, but is too embarassed to admit it because men are not supposed to want it. My partner actually talked me into the big wedding! I didn't want the big wedding because I really think weddings are boring, but we're going all traditional in a church and everything!
2007-09-18 02:40:45 · answer #4 · answered by skunk pie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both of you need to sit and talk about what you both want. If it is important that you be married before the baby is born, make sure he understands that.
Talk to him and find out what he wants instead of going crazy over it for no reason.
2007-09-18 02:15:35 · answer #5 · answered by shay 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I do believe in a healthy family and marriages. I do not, however, believe in getting married for a baby's sake. Unless you already have been discussing marriage and are truly happy with each other, then go for it. You do not have to rush into a situation that, in the long run, may create havoc in your lives.
2007-09-18 02:21:32 · answer #6 · answered by mamacass0304 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
So him not wanting you to miss out on the wedding of your dreams means he doesn't want to get married?
Odd.
Sounds like he wants to get married.
2007-09-18 06:06:15 · answer #7 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pregnancy is not a reason to get married...
Just because you're old enough to get pregnant doesn't mean you're mature enough to make a lifetime commitment to honor each other.
2007-09-18 02:52:36 · answer #8 · answered by Lady Tam 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Based on that conversation.... i dont see how he DOESNT want to marry you. Just because he thought your parents were gonna pay for the wedding, you think he doesnt wanna marry you... that doenst make sense to me.
2007-09-18 02:08:13 · answer #9 · answered by loki_only1 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just FYI, you dont have to go to vegas to elope... you can elope at any courthouse
2007-09-18 05:50:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋