My boyfriend's step-mother got me the job I'm at now and I thank her endlessly for it. However, yesterday I found out through one of our bosses/co-workers that she put in her 1 month's notice that morning so she could become a stay-at-home mom to her 1-year-old son! I really thought he was joking when he told me this at first because my boyfriend and I had gone over to her and her husband's (my boyfriend's father) house on Saturday and she didn't mention anything to us about quitting. To be honest, finding out the way I did kind of made me angry and just really made me feel like she didn't trust me enough to tell me personally (and I haven't given her a reason not to trust me that I know of). Especially since my boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year and a half. Plus, she's the one that got me this job! She's about the only person in my workplace that I actually like!
How would you have felt in that situation? Do I have a right to feel uncomfortable about this?
2007-09-18 01:47:37 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
As a matter of clarification, I'm not "new" at my job and I wasn't hired to take her place. I say she got me the job, but she would disagree and say she got me the interview and I got myself the job. But she DID get my foot in the door.
2007-09-18 01:57:01 · update #1
I probably should have added in my main details that the entire office knew about her quitting HOURS before I found out THROUGH SOME ONE ELSE. I was the LAST person in the ENTIRE office to find out. The reason I know this is because I found out 15 minutes before the end of the day, and right after I was told, almost all of our co-workers were in the back talking to her about it (my co-workers talk rather loud so I wasn't eavesdropping).
Thanks.
2007-09-18 02:50:40 · update #2
Yeah I would have been disappointed and a little hurt. Maybe on Saturday she didn't know yet she was going to be quitting. Maybe it was something she was thinking about and wanted to talk over with her husband but, hadn't done so yet.
A month is a long time to give notice maybe something else is going on.
2007-09-18 01:53:43 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I really don't see why any of this is a problem for you. I think you are being over-sensitive and taking this small thing and making it into a big trust issue between you and your boyfriend's step-mother. Maybe the true issue here isn't that she didn't tell you this bit of information but more of how you react to small things.
There may be several reasons why she didn't tell you. For one it's none of your business. This is a decision that is between her and her husband, not the entire family. Secondly, maybe she didn't see it as being information that others would find important or interesting. Third, she may not have discussed it with her husband or maybe they hadn't thoroughly discussed all the kinks and details to talk about it with others. Or fourth, she simply forgot to tell you or didn't see the dinner as "the time" to do so.
Whatever the reason is don't see into it more than you need to. If your boyfriend's step-mother helped you get a job (especially where she works) and is polite to you then obviously there isn't a problem with your relationship with her so don't make a problem. Also, whether you like anyone at work or not she's not obligated to stick around so you have somebody at your job with whom you like.
2007-09-18 02:37:39 · answer #2 · answered by Lwood 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Dont take offense, but I think you may have over--reacted a little. I mean the lady did get you the job. You have a right to feel what you want, but I wouldnt take offense. She doesnt owe you anything, let alone telling you her personal business and in a professional world the boss shouldn't have either. If you are there to take her place, you should be happy she thought enough about you to put you in. Be content love, theres too much other sh*t wrong with this world than to worry about something petty like that. Good luck on your new job!
2007-09-18 01:54:25 · answer #3 · answered by teri is ambience 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Perhaps she was waiting for the "right time" to tell you personally, and maybe you found out sooner. Cut her some slack, it sounds like the two of you have a good friendship, and in the long run what difference does it make other than the two of you aren't working together anymore? Which could be a good thing for your friendship as things change.
2007-09-18 01:56:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he's 26 years previous and could be waiting to do what he needs to do and not be controlled my his mom. looks as though his mom and grandmother are announcing unfavorable issues approximately you inflicting him to distance himself with the courting you adult adult males have (brainwashing). you have easily lost substantial factors in the courting because of the actuality the mum and grandmother have unfavorable evaluations approximately you so its going to make this very puzzling to persue something further with this guy. Is he a mommy's boy? if so, i could run a approaches away and circulate on. I somewhat have been in an identical undertaking the place my ex's mom and grandma hated me and it led to a breakup because of the fact i improve into so emotional with regards to the full difficulty. IF HE rather CARES approximately YOU, he will DO something HE CAN TO MAKE IT artwork. keep in mind that. If he's making an attempt to push you away i could go away him on my own for some days and notice what happens. maybe he desires time to think of.
2017-01-02 08:18:41 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend's step-mother's personal life is her own business and no one else's.
Her decision to quit the job and stay home with her child is personal, also.
I'm sure that in time, she will mention it... I don't think there is a reason to be upset about this. It's HER life and situation and she's made a choice, which doesn't affect you at all.
You dont' have to have her at work to keep your job. Live your life, and let others live theirs. and take care.
2007-09-18 02:12:10 · answer #6 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she hadn't mentioned to her husband yet that she was quitting. Plus, maybe she wasn't too sure how the entire family would react so she is waiting to tell everyone when she is ready or right before she quits.
2007-09-18 02:24:18 · answer #7 · answered by Love being a Mom 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's never wise to work with a family member. Don't take it personal, keep working and be supportive of her decision to stay at home.
2007-09-18 02:15:13 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i would be a little upset too esp since u feel close but maybe this is something personal that she was still working out with her husband before she felt compelled to announce it to you. i would just respect her privacy and bring it up later if its still bothering u.
2007-09-18 02:14:47 · answer #9 · answered by spadezgurl22 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Actually I don't think she needs to tell you anything. No matter for how long you've been dating her step-son it is her business and anything else she does is still her business. Period.
2007-09-18 01:54:19 · answer #10 · answered by Jocelyn's mommy 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋