could my bf b an abuser?

Question

i have been wit my bf for 2yrs and right now we are broken up... and plan on getting back wit eachother ((thats wat we say but who knows..))... anyways i was listenin to a radio station and they said that the first signs is when he starts checkin ur cell...
well my bf has been checkin my cell for a very long time now.. and i still visit him even when were broken up, and still is constantly checkin txt and calls...!!!! could this b a sign of something else??? wat do u think?

Answer 1

most likely not- its just probably that hes getting too comfortable with your relationship that hes relaxing more and thinks its ok to invade that privacy. whether it is ok to check that or not is entirely up to you. if that is the only potential sign of abusiveness that he shows, then no, i really do not think you need to worry about anything[=

however if he does show other signs, get OUT OUT OUT OUT!!!! but until then ur fine. o0o0o0o, also, even if imtelling you no, but your gut tells you yes, that he is going 2 b abusive, then forget about this and leave. your gut is right 98 percent of the time. dont take a chance on this being the 2 percent possibility.

good luck and God bless ma<3

Answer 2

each each now and then human beings supply ultimatums because of the fact they think of that's the only way you will do what they choose. SHe ought to have picked that trick up from her ex-abuser boyfriend. Abusers many times use ultimatums as the thank you to get what they choose. It feels like your chum desires some therapy. Stuff happens whilst human beings drink(and for this reason i do no longer believe using alcohol)yet I doubt which you and your boyfriend are fairly abusive in the direction of one yet another. If the scuffling with whilst sober ever escalates into throwing issues or punching the partitions or something that is an incorrect way of showing anger, then i might start to fret. those are warning signs of anger manipulation. "you will do what i choose for all time, otherwise i visit break the abode" ultimately this type of anger/behaivor will become actual abuse. approximately your chum; tell her that she is attempting to regulate you and that may no longer perfect considering you're a guy or woman and you have strategies and emotions and in case you ever concept you have been in any possibility you does no longer be with your boyfirend. tell her that she has unresolved themes, and for this reason you will forgive her for providing you with an ultimatum.

Answer 3

No I doubt it. I have a habit of going thru EVERYone's cells and I am FAR from being an abuser. I'm nosey. Maybe he does not feel very secure in you guys relationship. I used to check my bf's phone 24/7 and the more he tried to hide it from me the more interested I became. If he would have treated it like no big deal it wouldnt have sparked my interest. He probably thinks he's going to find something one day...especially if he already has.

Answer 4

I myself just came out of a 3 yr like that, and it's not worth it. This might sound harsh but, he's making sure he has you on the side lines for himself, he's waiting to see what comes along. You don't "plan" to get back together. Either you do or you don't, there's no in between. You need to get yourself together and find something new.

Answer 5

No, it is a sign of caring and protectiveness of his girl, there is nothing wrong with it. It shows that he cares about you and wants to make sure you wont cheat on him or no1 is bothering you. I remember checking my gf's buddy list on messangers just to see what kinda people she knew and hung around, she didnt mind it at all and thought I was very protecting of her, after all girls like to be protected by their men!! As for the phone I would also do that to see if she doesnt have too many guys on there that I dont want her to be talking to or if I see that she might be cheating.

Answer 6

are u kidding me..checking ure phone to see if your faithful and not talking to other guys all the time...thats crazy...you could say the first signs of a killer are watching PG-13 movies...come on...common sense

Answer 7

SIGNS OF ABUSE
1. PUSHES FOR QUICK INVOLVEMENT: Comes on strong, claiming, "I've never felt loved like this by anyone." Pressures the new partner for an exclusive commitment almost immediately.
2. JEALOUS: Excessively possessive; calls constantly or visits unexpectedly. Prevents you from going to work because "you might meet someone".
3. CONTROLLING: Interrogates you intensely (especially if you are late) about whom you talked to and where you were; keeps all the money; insists you ask permission to go anywhere or do anything.
4. UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS: Expects you to be the perfect mate and meet his or her every need.
5. ISOLATION: Tries to cut you off from family and friends; accuses people who support you of "causing trouble." May deprive you of a phone or car, or try to prevent you from holding a job.
6. BLAMES OTHERS FOR PROBLEMS OR MISTAKES: It's always someone else's fault if something goes wrong.
7. MAKES OTHERS RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS OR HER FEELINGS: Says, "You make me angry," instead of, "I am angry," or says, "You're hurting me by not doing what I tell you."
8. HYPERSENSITIVITY: Is easily insulted, claiming hurt feelings when he or she is really mad. Rants about the injustice of things that are just part of life.
9. CRUELTY TO ANIMALS OR CHILDREN: Kills or punishes animals brutally. May expect children to do things far beyond their ability (whips a 3-year-old for wetting a diaper) or teases them until they cry. Sixty-five percent of abusers who beat their partner will also abuse children.
10. "PLAYFUL" USE OF FORCE DURING SEX: Enjoys throwing you down or holding you down against your will during sex; finds the idea of rape exciting.
11. VERBAL ABUSE: Constantly criticizes or says blatantly cruel things; degrades, curses, calls you ugly names. This may involve sleep deprivation, waking you with relentless verbal abuse.
12. RIGID GENDER ROLES: Expects you to serve, obey, remain at home.
13. SUDDEN MOOD SWINGS: Switches from sweet to violent in minutes.
14. PAST BATTERING: Admits to hitting a mate in the past, but says the person "made" him (or her) do it.
15. THREATS OF VIOLENCE: Says things like, "I'll break your neck" or "I'll kill you, " then dismisses them with, "Everybody talks that way" or "I didn't really mean it."

Answer 8

No. It could become him controlling you, but most likely not. He should trust you though. If I was you, I would find someone new. He is making sure your not talking to someone else.

Answer 9

not necessarily a abuser but there are trust issues there. trust is the first brick in the house of relationships. if you don't have trust you are not going to have a true meaningful relationship.

Answer 10

your bf can lick his *** if he can. wtf kinda man is that ****. he is insecure about himself. is he ugly? i bet he is! and yes i think he is an abuser especially if he ends up getting ticked off and maybe he will hit you. if your scared you should leave. dont be controlled by some insecured little dick wash dude, be a real woman and tell that sucka to lay off. well hope i helped. OnE LuV