Do you think this is extremely rude?

Question

I have a friend that talks to me while we wait for our kid's to get out of elementary school. Anyway,she works with a co-worker who she is friends with and they see each other everyday at work. When I am trying to talk to my friend I will call her,"Alyssa,"Alyssa will stand there while I am talking to her and she will CONSTANTLY text message her friend at work.

Am I overreacting but do you think this is extremely rude? I mean these two people see each other everyday at work,and I only get to see Alyssa two days a week because of her work schedule. Should I be blunt and say,"You know,I think it is really rude of you to be text messaging somebody,when I am talking to you,"or should I just let it go?

The same question goes for if you go out to eat with friends and they are sitting at the table text messaging other people,do you find this rude too? How would you deal with this and what would you say? I just think this is really rude and inconsiderate,when you are with other people.

Answer 1

YES! I was taught when I'm having a conversation to look the person in the eye while we're talking. When someone is texting, I feel like they're not paying attention to our conversation at all! I even hate answering my phone when I'm at dinner with my family and friends and if I must answer the call, I make it quick.

I'd tell her straight that you think it's rude and inconsiderate that she can't take her eyes off her phone for the few minutes she gets to talk to you.

Also, just as a note: I'm 22 years old.

Answer 2

Yes, it is rude to not give your attention to a friend who is talking to you, having dinner with you, etc. I feel this way about answering cell phones while in the middle of a conversation or meal. Unless there is an emergency situation, people should just cut it out.

On the other hand, her rudeness could be intentionally offensive, like she doesn't want to talk to you but for some reason thinks it rude to say so directly.

I would ask her (and your rude dining friend) if she is TRYING to be rude and trying to end your friendship or if she is simply not aware. This way you can clear the air for either situation by either letting her understand that her actions, while they might have no ill intention, have hurtful consequences. Or, if she is trying to be rude, you can then find out why.

Answer 3

Keep a paperback book with you and when something like this happens pull your book out and start reading. Even when you're aware they've finished read a few more pages. It should get the point across that it's rude and unless they're totally clueless it should be a hint to them that this is something they do regularly. If they ask then say nicely that it's boring for you to just stand/sit there while they're having a text message with someone else and that you might as well take your pleasure where and when you can get it!!

Answer 4

Very inconsiderate all the way around. When you are with people whether you're just visiting, sitting down for a meal, or stop to talk with them outside the school it's extremely rude to NOT give that person your full attention.
If it were me I would probably not even bother talking to her. I'd strike up a conversation with someone else.

Answer 5

I would definitely say something. She probably doesn't realize that she's being rude to you and if she has a good attitude, she will be understanding and apologetic.

Same goes for dinner time. Texting and talking on the phone while you're at dinner with someone is rude. Next time, if you're in the middle of saying something and she starts texting, stop what you were saying right away and just wait in silence for her to finish. If she tells you to continue talking, tell her you'd rather wait until she is finished with her other conversation. Unless she is obtuse, your point will be made.

Answer 6

Yeah, that is kinda rude. Espectially if the person is an adult. LIke you said, you only get to see her two days a week. If she can't function without texting then there is something wrong. I say you subtly mention it to her. Maybe say, "I like talking to you, but it is hard when I don't see your face." I do suggest mentioning it though.

Hehehe, I know this is a bit childish, but one of my friends was just as addicted to texting as yours, and I only got to see her maybe once every 2 weeks. I would wait for her to take out her cell phone, then snatch it away and hold onto it. I would give it back when we were about to part ways. It was great though, because she would twitch and flinch at any vibration or sound because her cell phone wasn't in her hand. For a while she would attempt to get it back, but I just held it out of reach. At least I got her attention, and she wouldn't text as much around me.

Answer 7

I think texting while in the company of others is rude period, regardless of how much that person gets to see the person they're texting. It's like talking on your cell phone in the middle of dinner. If I were you, I wouldn't say anything- I'd just quit talking while she's texting. If she says something, you can always say, "It looks like you're busy. We'll catch up some other time."

Answer 8

she seriously needs to shut up and get over it. She is not new to hollywood and she should know by now that everything she does becomes news. And if those kids didn't idolize her she wouldn't have a career. But yet she wants people to buy her cds and watch her show. I understand that sometimes the paparazzi can go too far but seriously, she needs to suck it up and deal with it or she can just go back to nashville.And stress, what stress, shes not even that famous. Yes right now she is having her moment of fame but compared to most people who have been around for years, she is nothing. She needs to suck it up and stop whining. She's a celebrity, she doesn't get to have a private life. Its not fair but that's just the way it is and she should know that by now. Grow up miley

Answer 9

While the idea of the paperbook book appeals to me, I've learned over the years that countering rudeness with rudeness isn't really the answer. I think that Patrick's wife has the right idea - nicely question your friend and perhaps give her the benefit of the doubt -- perhaps she simply isn't aware of just how rude she is.

Our society has become increasingly rude overall and lacking in common courtesy and it's a true shame. Let's all try countering that rudeness with simple kindness and good manners!

Answer 10

Yes, I would say that is pretty rude. I would definitely say something. Maybe she doesn't realise she is being rude. Some people lack the consideration and you just have to be straight forward. I would say, "Excuse me but are you listening? It seems like you are more interested in your phone than what I have to say." "Do you mind? I am talking to you." Otherwise I would let it go or just stop alkin to them until they are ready to talk to you. Then maybe bring it up. Hope this helps.