my daughter's father & I have shared joint custody, he is constantly calling me and harrassing me, hanging up on me if he doesn't like my replies, and will absolutely NOT compromise with me on anything concerning our 9 month old daughter. He has her way more than I do, because I work during the week, and he doesn't work at all. He refuses to get a job during the day because he would lose time with her. Everything he does is to get to me. Last night he called my phone 26 times before knocking on the door. My phone was outside, I was inside. He threatens me all the time, I'm just tired of it. He kicked me out of our home when i was 9 months pregnant, when i confronted him about cheating on me. Last week he told me he wants to be a family again, this week we argued on the phone and he told me it would be our last conversation. I don't know what to do. Help!
2007-09-17 07:35:51 · 9 answers · asked by tlimsisnw7 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Law Enforcement & Police
It's called a protection order or restraining order. Did you have a lawyer?? If not, now is the time to get one. Seek 100 % custody. This guy is an abuser and has no right to see his daughter based on that. (I am on disability b/c my dad was that way. No need to put your daughter through it, too.) You need to get over the fact that you are working. Send your daughter to day care. She'll actually be safer there. Ask coworkers where they take their kids.
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/intermittent-explosive-disorder/DS00730
http://secretsofdivorce.com/divorcebadhabits.htm
http://www.barnesjewish.org/groups/default.asp?NavID=1652
Go to a battered women's shelter so he can't find you. It's the only way you'll be free of him. And make sure your place of work has a copy of the restraining order at reception with his photo. Have him arrested if he breaks the order of protection. Your ex needs help a lot more than you need him. Take him to court - you can have him pay the fees and get your child away from him. Let him have visitation if you can't stomach cutting him off from her completely, but make sure it is supervised visitation.
2007-09-17 07:54:00 · answer #1 · answered by Serena 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Go to court and try to get full or more custody of you child. Show the court that he does not work, the household is messy, etc. etc. From there move some where far away and have a common meeting place like the police department for child custody exchanges.
2007-09-17 18:45:05 · answer #2 · answered by Kate 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time to see the judge. You need a restraining order. The court will also work out the visitation. If you have a layer, give him a call. They are used to these kind of things and handle them everyday.
2007-09-17 07:47:06 · answer #3 · answered by 4scar 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This will only get worse and worse and no matter what he says do not believe him... He will never change and you are right, he want to control you. He has a sickness and needs help.
You first need to call a local woman's abuse hot line and get their advice and help. Work with them on getting an injunction for protection. He will then be disallowed to have contact with you.
I would also call the police and make a harassing phone calls complaint.
Not to scare you, or maybe to, you need to get help fast. This man WILL HURT you or your daughter PHYSICALLY sooner or later.
Call the police, get a report, press charges and please oh please call the woman's abuse number and get an Injunction against him!
2007-09-17 07:45:22 · answer #4 · answered by Dog Lover 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Start looking for any organization that will help abused women. You won't know how much trouble you are in until your dead... Then what happens to your daughter?
You story is old and told over and over again by women that have been hurt bad or by their parents, sisters and brothers. Get smart, get away until he's under control
2007-09-17 07:44:41 · answer #5 · answered by ggraves1724 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Document all. Every phone call, letter and conversation. Get yourself a lawyer and get a written custody agreement if you don't already have one and get an order for support. It's his kid too and he should be paying something towards her care. I also suggest seeking counseling for you. Abuse is not just physical, it can be verbal and mental.
2007-09-17 07:47:58 · answer #6 · answered by Bonnie F 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
seek profesional help, get a lawyer, go to court, get ful custody of your beloved child, this matter is not a joke. you need to take this extremely carefully, if he continues these actions it will lead to physical asult! get a lawyer now! and get custody over your child, if he is that way towards you, what do you think the child is and will go through. starts saving e-mails and recording his calls, get evidence and GO TO COURT. please, i have seen this happen before, please quickly get a restraining order and go to court! all the police next time he calls and says threatning things-if its bad call 911 if it is not an emergency call a non emergency polince line!!!!!
2007-09-17 07:52:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
get a small tape recorder. Everytime he calls or visits, tell him it is turned on. Call him by name when you state this. This will at least slow him down and be legal. You really need an attorney to get full relief from him.
2007-09-17 09:04:10 · answer #8 · answered by sensible_man 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move far, far away, and leave no forwarding address at all. Be sneaky about it, and don't have any contact with anyone until you're established. That's about the only alternative better than shooting the bastard. . . .
2007-09-17 07:44:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋