how do you get a 2 yr. old to listen, and mind?

Question

i have a 2 yr. old and a 15 mo. old. my 2 yr. old doesn't listen. you can ask him over and over to do something, or NOT do something, and he doesn't care, he does it (or won't do it) anyways. how do i get him to listen and mind when i say something?

Answer 1

og goodness, i wanna know as well. my neighbor's daughter is like that and now my daughter is learning from her! it's so hard!

Answer 2

Make sure you make him make eye contact with you. Sometimes a two year old will not really register what you're asking him right away. Do repeat up to three times if necessary, he may not yet be at the developmental stage to respond after the first time. I know it is annoying, but unfortunately sometimes stages kids go through are! If he still won't listen to you, then you should follow up with a consequence for him not listening. It should be something appropriate for the situation. You could give him a time out, two minutes is usually right for a two year old, he may need some time to be able to focus on what you are saying. When the time out make sure you explain to him the reason for his time out. If you keep consistent you should be over the problem behavior fairly soon and onto another problem;)

Answer 3

A couple of ideas here:
- Play games with him, like Simon Says, Mother May I, Telephone, etc. They will help him learn to listen but sneak the learning in.
- Be consistent. Whatever discipline you use, positive/negative/both, give him one shot at it, no warnings (warnings teach you don't mean it UNTIL...), and then the consequence. If you use positive discipline, catch him at being "good" often and consistently! (:
- Be patient. This is normal for a two year old - and it does pass. (:
- Do you have him around other children? He can learn from that too, though you want to be careful not to have their bad habits rub off on him and vice versa...
- Is he bored? Sometimes kids, especially younger ones, will act out because they can't tell us they're bored or how they're feeling whether it be mad, sad, or happy..
- Do you do parent-centered activities as well as let him have time to play on his own? If not, you might start. It gets him focused on you (or any adult, really - but parents are best) and on the idea that he can't do everything he wants at all times.
- You can try a VERY simple rule chart. Something on the order of Listen (with an ear pic), Watch (with an eye pic), etc. The rule of thumb would be no more rules than he is years old, with a consistent consequence for obeying and disobeying. You can reward with stickers or other treats, and use timeouts for not following.
- You might check out loveandlogic.com. I love their methods! (: Although for a two year old, there's not as much you can do with this method as for a teenager, for instance.

Good luck! (:

Answer 4

At 2 yrs, she/he will be testing you, trying to see what they can get away with. All kids do it. Try bending down to their level when you talk to them. When they do something they aren't supposed to be doing, enforce consequences early. Time-outs, no sweets, no movies, no playtime... something so they can remember that if they do something "bad", there's something worse coming next. Also, catch them. When they're in their room doing something, sneak up on them, and calmly ask "What are you doing, baby?" It will startle them, but at least you have a non-threatening catch. They'll be more hesitant to do "bad" things when they know you could be watching at any minute. Enforce rules a couple at a time. At 2 yrs, they won't remember 30 rules at a time. You just have to take it in stride and see their situation though a 2 yrs old eyes. There is a reason it's quoted "Terrible Twos".

Answer 5

I always used an idea I read in a book and found it worked well for both my kids. Give your child choices of things to do and have them pick. Instead of just asking individual questions which will most always result in the child not wanting or willing to do any, ask which of 3 things they want to do first, they are trapped into choosing one. They feel empowered by this and in turn are more cooperative. When all chores are done, offer a few choices for treats after the work is done! I hope this helps! Good Luck!

Answer 6

First of all, You Don't. Period. 2 year olds are not capable of understanding punishment and discipline yet. Their brains can't handle it. The best thing you can do is redirect your child to do what it is you want him to. For example, if you tell him its time to eat and he needs to get in his chair and he ignores you- Calmly walk over to him, get down on his level and say, "Mommy said it is time to eat. We're going to get in your highchair now." Then physically take him and do it.

It doesn't help that 2 year olds are classic for being so absorbed in what they're doing that they truly don't hear you. Just be patient and keep showing him what behavior you'd like for him to have and it will get there. Punishing him for not listening at this point will only be harmful to him and won't help you to achieve a better behaved child because he won't understand it.

Good luck!

Answer 7

the second a child hears a negative word suhas no or don't they turn off their ears. When wanting the child to stop doing something suggest them to do something else. Example you want Bobby to stop drawing on the walls. Say Bobby thats a beautiful picture can you do it on paper so I can hang it on the fridge? If you want the child to pick up his toys make it simple at a young age they feel overwhelmed start by asking the child to pick up just one thing and then say ok where do you think that goes and how about that one. Oh and welcome to the terrible twos. Good Luck!

Answer 8

This is what they mean when they say "THE TERRIBLE 2S" It is horrible, when my daughter was 2 she would laugh at me if I spanked her (I am sure it was because of the diaper, it didn't hurt at all), I finally stopped and make her go on time out. I used to sit her facing the wall, I think is more effective because they get it and they realize there will be consequences if they ignore you or do not do what you tell them.

I hope it helps and good luck

Answer 9

My son is 2 and I have the same problems with him. If he is doing something dangerous or hurting someone, I will tell him no one time and if he continues I redirect him and if that doesn't work and he is not listening, I spank him lightly on the bottom or tap his hand. If he is getting into trouble or won't pick up his toys, I will say no one time and if the behavior continues I put him in a time-out.

Answer 10

Make sure you have his attention, my sister-in-law makes sure that her kids are looking her in the eye. Give him one direction at a time and then make sure that he does what he is asked to do. It takes a lot of patience and time. I was lucky my kids listened to me pretty well in their toddler years but my 12 year seems to have a problem with listening now... :)

Answer 11

2 year olds are not noted for minding. they are just starting to branch out and be independent. be consistent with your requests/demands and he'll learn. it's hard on both of you, I know, but it's part of being 2.