I want to be a SAHM. How does your family make it work??

Question

Hi. My husband makes about $50,000 per year. Can we make it work?? How do other families do it?? How much $$ do other husbands make, so their wives can stay home??

BTW, For all you smart a**es, I am not lazy. I have a job, I am a nurse. I am at home with our new baby and I have to return to work in two weeks. And it is very difficult to leave my new baby in daycare.

Answer 1

What is a "Sahm" for us old people?


Seriously...I don't know what it means - could someone define it for me?


OH...Stay at Home Mom! Thank you! I think being a stay at home mom is probably one of the most difficult jobs - most rewarding too! $50,000 a year might be tight - but I think you could do it.

(and I really didn't know what it meant - with today's society I thought is was more like a Paris Hilton kind of thing - I'm old, what can I say?)

Answer 2

I am a SAHM for the last 2 years with my daughter (2) and my son (8 months) and my husband makes far less than yours does. It depends on where you live and what you have available to you, but you certainly can make it work if you are willing to make a few small sacrifices. One thing you need to remember is that the name brand versions of things are often the same as the generic versions. You will find a few things that you won't budge on (my husband and I will only buy Hidden Valley brand ranch dressing for instance), but even if you weren't wanting to be a SAHM - no one ever got rich by spending more money than they needed to, so why not get the best value for your buck? I buy the cheaper versions of shampoos, conditioners, hand soaps, laundry detergents, softener sheets, paper towels, toilet paper, etc. and it saves us a ton of money. I also puree as much of my son's food as possible from fresh, frozen or canned foods and it is much cheaper than buying jars of baby food and they last a lot longer. I clip coupons, I send in rebates and I rummage sale (both as a buyer and a seller).

I'm totally giving a thumbs down to anyone who thinks this decision is about being lazy or selfish - I have never worked so hard in my life as I have chasing after 2 kids that need to be fed, changed, played with, read to, bathed, entertained, and cared for when they are sick or overtired. Not to mention the constant cleaning the house needs, the increase in laundry that needs to be washed, dried and put away, the cooking that needs to be done because going out to eat is now a treat again instead of an everyday thing, and the errands that need to be run with 2 kids in tow. This is so not a lazy (wo)man's job. In our case, the cost of daycare would have eaten up just about every penny I would have made by continuing to work outside of the home. The rest would have gone to pay for gas, car maintenance, extra baby stuff to keep at daycare and work clothes. This isn't a choice that a woman makes alone - my husband and I talked about it for months before our daughter was born and we both agreed that it was what was best for us. When you weigh it all out and find out what works best for YOUR family, everything else will fall into place! I guess you just have to jump in and do it and eventually you'll find what works for you, but it is certainly possible. Good luck - it's been the best decision we've ever made for our family.

Answer 3

It used to be that $50,000 was alot of money, but that's not how it is anymore. Depends on where you live. If you live in the midwest you will be able to live just fine, but it might not be the case on the coasts or bigger cities.

What you have to understand about staying at home is that you have to change your priorities. What's more important to you?

Work out a budget and see if you can do it. Base your decision on that. As a nurse you might also looking into a nurses call center where you can work from home.

My advice from a mom who did it at least for the first 6years, is that its worth the sacrifice. But then my husband was bringing in $10,000 in the early 80's and we lived in a 1 bedroom apartment. The last two years I was at home, we moved into a 3 bedroom townhouse, also rented. I sold avon, discovery toys, a snack product, cleaned houses and babysat. I don't have alot of regrets other than I didn't get to do it longer.

Answer 4

I was a 'SAHM' (stay at home mom, for those who can't figure it out from her question) on FAR LESS than $50,000 a year. We had four kids, and I homeschooled them, and we had a 'huge garden' that grew mostly 'decorative flowers' with a few 'fruits and vegies' so the kids would 'know' where what they ate 'came from.' These days the cost of living is higher, but you should be able to 'tighten your belt' a little and stay at home, at least until your 'little ones' get old enough to go to school, then get a 'part time' job during the day ... IT IS UP TO YOU to 'make it work' ...

Answer 5

Hi,
First off you totally need to map out your expenses. Make a spreadsheet and include all your montly expenses (mortgage/rent, groceries, power, water, cable, etc.). Make sure you don't forget anything. Also add in costs of your kid(s). Include doctor co-pays, prescriptions, formula, clothes, etc. When you're done, see how much is left over in your husband's salary. You don't want to cut it too close, make sure there is extra for any emergencies that may arise. You may also want to map out how long you are planning on staying home. That may help with the big picture. My advice is to plan as accurately as you can and sacrifice what you can do without. Clip coupons. Each family operates differently, so it is a personal decision. Good luck!

Answer 6

Well I think it is going to be hard for you to leave the new born and go to work. If your husband is ok with that you can stay home. When your kid is a bit older you can always find a new job (and that is if you have money problems). Lots of mums do it (not so common in my country though) so taking care of your kid is a good idea. Many people wish they had spent more time with their parents!

Answer 7

Sure, why not? Honestly my husband and I together make less than that and we do just fine. Own a house, pay all of our bills on time and we have two children. Its hard, but you just have to be sure to create a budget and stick with it. I think you'll be just fine. And whats the harm in trying? If it doesn't work out you can always go back to work. Good luck to you! :)


And I just saw your extra info there... Don't let what others think on here decide for you. There is absolutly nothing wrong with wanting to stay at home to care for your child. That in no way makes someone lazy. What could be better for them? I wish you nothing but the best and congratulations on the new little one! :)

Answer 8

Well, for us, it required that we paid off a lot of debt and agreed to live in a smaller house. If you have very little debt, you can do it, but be prepared to not be able to afford some things. We also saved about 6 months of my salary so we could adjust slowly rather than jumping from two incomes to one.

The best thing I can tell you is plan, plan, plan. Don't just jump. It took us one year and three months to work it out, and we still had some gliches

Answer 9

When I was a SAHM my hubby was only making about $35,000. He has since moved up in rank but we made it with that amount all the same. You just have to live within your means. Don't over spend and don't be afraid to stop indulging on all the new trends. When you get where you want to be financially there will be even cooler trends to participate in.

Answer 10

The first thing you could try is putting your paycheck in a savings account and see if you can pay bills, buy groceries, etc. with just your husbands income.
There are many different adjustments to this that include going to the movies, out to dinner, breakfast etc. This is where I would start.