wedding problem / reception; lack of funds...?

Question

im planning to get married in early June 2008. the problem that i am facing is that we don't have the funds for a reception...what can we do? i was told that many people get married and then go out to dinner with family...this is fine, but i really want to experience the whole father daughter dance and our first dance and cutting of the cake....any advice? i was thinking of a 'back yard' reception, but to pay for the tables, chairs, dinner wear, food...etc...its going to cost roughly the same ($4,000 - $7,000)...any one have a neat idea's or something that you did instead of a reception?

thanks...

---we live in Anaheim, CA - Orange County

--we do have a stable income, i just don't think i can afford the thousands it takes for a nice reception....any ideas would help. thank you.

Answer 1

A reception can be very simple. You can have a reception with cake and coffee. Yes, even with that type of reception you can do the dancing. Just hire a DJ or use Cd's or an IPod. If you rent a hall somewhere it won't be too expensive, just have a simple reception. I had my reception at the Reef Restaurant in Long Beach, CA. We had a sit down dinner for 60 people and the cake was include in the pricing. Have your wedding early and the reception during what would be considered the lunch hour and you will save about $20 per head. We also cut out the appetizers and the bar (there is a bar in the restaurant if someone wanted a drink), which saved about $20 per person on that, too. We got a great deal. I hope this helps. Best wishes and congrats on your upcoming nuptials.

Answer 2

Do you have friends and/or family with tables and chairs you can borrow? It doesn't matter if they don't match. It's amazing how much you can save when you find that one person has a six-foot table and ten chairs, and another has two card tables and someone else has fifteen chairs you can borrow. Rent some inexpensive white tablecloths for the tables, and go to town. You may also be able to borrow dishes and silverware from your nearest and dearest.

Self catering can save a bundle if you do it properly. Stick to picnic-style foods or buy take and heat meals from Costco. Their cakes aren't the most inspirational, but they're certainly plenty tasty to satisfy most, and a lot less expensive than most bakeries.

Set up the music with a boom box or an iPod.

I got all the flowers I needed for my wedding - accessories included - for $35 by going to an open-to-the-public florist's supply and choosing a little of everything that was cheap and long-stemmed and looked pretty together. We added in a couple bunches of red roses, some red ribbon, a roll of florist's tape and a card of corsage pins. Okay, that was fourteen years ago, but I bet you could do roughly the same for $50 - $60 today. That made up: six sheaf bouquets, six boutonnierres, one corsage, and a rose for each reception table. You don't need huge amounts of flowers out of doors, so it won't cost very much.

Have a dry reception or a single champagne toast, or limit liquor to beer and champagne. Don't charge for drinks, but there's nothing rude about not offering every possible drink under the sun.

Keep the guest list on the small side. Don't invite your single friends to bring dates. Don't invite people you don't speak to regularly unless they're fairly close family.

Forget favors. Unless they're popular edibles, at least half get left behind, and half of those that get taken sit on a shelf or in a drawer gathering dust for the next ten years wating for someone to decide they won't feel guilty about donating it to charity or throwing it out.

Saving money on a reception is all about being creative and opening your eyes to the myriad possibilities around you. And if you send out the word that you could use a hand saving money, you may just be surprised at the offers that come your way.

Answer 3

I'm facing the same problem as you. The location for the ceremony will be fairly cheap ($400) but I"m having trouble finding a reception location for less than 10 grand. I've tried hotels big and small, chains and independent B&B's. I've just come to the conclusion that I'm going to have to do a potluck at my mom's house for a reception. A friend has offered to take the pictures and only charge what it costs to print them. I realize I'll be giving up the dancing and the DJ but none of my friends or my fiancee dance so its not a big deal. I'm looking into doing a pot luck/bbq reception at a local park. I live in the SF Bay Area.

If you havent already check out www.theknot.com and www.herecomestheguide.com I've found some good jumping off points there. Good Luck!!

Answer 4

Do the reception at a time that is not a meal time. Just serve cake, coffee, maybe punch, water. Get the cake from a local restaurant (they're usually quite good & much cheaper). Look for an outdoor setting where you won't have to rent chairs and tables. Cut everything you don't need. Instead of a DJ, burn some CD's and find someone willing to act as a DJ. Don't do favors and for decorations, try to get creative and make them yourselves. You also have a lot of time and a few holidays between now and then, so shop the sales afterwards. You never know what you'll find. Good Luck & Congratulations!

Answer 5

find a way to cut cost on the church (no church? i know thats touchy for some)

Do a BBQ or something. don't do a cake for everyone. just one to cut, smoosh frosting in each others face and freeze *** or find a way to cut back on that further.

You may know a school or someone that can loan chairs and the families can do 40-80% of the cooking. Sometimes a member or the Lions club, rotary club, or *Knights of Columbus can get a better deal on a local reception hall.

A friend can be put in charge of the video camera. 2-3 people can do pictures for you. - in california one of your friends can be made a World Minister Online too. A couple friends can run a laptop with Good speaker and an Ipod/iTunes instead of a DJ. (as long as a wedding list is made a month ahead of time)


dishes and wine is the one thing i dont think you can avoid buying /renting. alcohol is the other question.
make your own invitations!

Answer 6

With only 3 months before the wedding and the invitations I assume are already printed and almost ready to be mailed, you might want to step back and think a minute....if could be very costly if not impossible to find another place on such short notice. I would make an appt. asap with the manager of the venue to discuss your options. If you were lucky enough to get this statement in writing, the manager will need to take responsibility and work it out somehow. However, there could be safety or fire laws preventing them from now moving the dance floor. If your guest list is now larger than you originally proposed, perhaps this arrangement is the only way to accommodate your numbers. I would talk with the manager to come to some compromise. Sure the venue could lose your booking, and they know your options to change will be costly. I would bring any contracts or info you were given at the time of your booking. The person who told you a year ago may no longer be there. So now is the time to reconfirm your expectations, costs, and other details of the day. See what the manager is willing to do to make you happy. Getting your money back may consist of adjustment on your costs, added extras. The venue may consider renting another dance floor to bring in for your wedding if their floor cannot be physically moved. Having two dance floors may be an option. I would consider all options before you choose or do something emotionally without realizing the ripple effect of your decision. You must have chosen this venue for many other reasons than the dance floor, consider those reasons also. I know you are disappointed, but in the grand scheme of things, having all the other details work out perfectly it so much more important. I have seen guests just get up and dance any where if the dance floor was too crowded or too far away. Take someone with you to listen for the details. And good luck, it will work out okay and you will have a really nice wedding.

Answer 7

Food:
I have been reading up on inexpensive wedding receptions, and I have noticed that potluck wedding receptions are becoming popular. With a potluck reception, all of your guests will bring a dish, and everyone will share.
Or, pasta dishes are very inexpensive, and are quite filling. You can offer different pasta types and different sauces such as: alfredo, marinara, pesto, etc. You can also offer bread, veggies, and salad on the side.
You can serve the food buffet style on paper plates, and using plastic utensils.
Alcohol:
A keg is the cheapest way to go if you like beer. If you like wine, you can easily make sangria. To do this you can buy inexpensive boxes of red and white wine, and you can add different types of fruit such as pears, apples, grapes, etc. Pour the wine in large punch bowls, and let everyone serve themselves. Boxed wines aren’t the best tasting, but they are inexpensive and the fruit will give them better flavor.
Location: Local community centers can be rented by the hour, and the prices are very reasonable. Most have non-carpeted floors, so you will be able to dance with your father. Otherwise, if you have the reception in your back yard, you can rent a dance floor from a party rental company.
Cake:
Order a small, beautiful cake for pictures and the cutting. This cake can be for you and your husband to enjoy and take home. For everyone else, order a large sheet cake to cut up and distribute.

Answer 8

Congratulations for admitting you do not have the $. So many just acquire a huge debt they pay off forever. You are wise to not spend more than you can. There is no rule saying there has to be a first dance. You will have to forfeit that but if your mind is set on the marriage instead of a several hour wedding you will be much better off. Talk with your fiance and reach an agreement say to go to a justice of the peace and then have a luncheon ( which is less costly than a dinner) It is all about your love and not the big extravaganza where everyone is stressed and worried about silly details like when the photographs will be starting. I bet you will have a wonderful wedding , simple and meaningful. Congratulations to you both

Answer 9

A nice reception can be done for so much less. Tables and chairs will be the main cost if you have it in a your backyard.
Don't do a full course meal, just do finger food and have your family help out with making it. Do veg tray and fruit. Sandwiches for the food. Cocktail shrimp, you can get them on sale all the time by the bundles at Sams or walmart. Sams is cheaper though.
As for the plates and silverware. Get the clear plastic silverware, and the pretty clear platic plates. Get the real pretty napkins that match your color. A nice reception does not have to be all white linen and gourmet food. It is all about how you make it out to be.
http://www.anaheim.net/article.asp?id=92
Try this place, it is good size and they have special rates for residents. All you will need to do is prepare the food.
Then get a stereo with connected speakers and do your own music. You can have all of what you want at a fraction of that price if you budget. Call them and see what they can do for you.
Hope this helps.

Answer 10

Well....

You can make your own favors.

Buy your cake from somewhere like a coffee shop or one of those places that's a hole in the wall. They usually have better prices than a bakery or a grocery store.

Go to an arts and crafts store and do your own decorations with fake flowers. They're not bad and people REALLY don't care. They're there to see you two get married, not to criticize your choice of flowers. And if you're really careful, and don't remove the tags, you can return those flowers. That's a big money saver.

Have the bar set up so people have to buy their alcohol. That way, people don't raise YOUR tab and they'll be less likely to get drunk and drive home.

I've found that some ministers will also do DJing.... They're usually a lot cheaper then DJ's alone. OR if you can find a friend, willing to do it, again, that's a lot cheaper.

Those "print your own" invitations turn out REALLY nice. We used those at my mother's wedding and people thought we spent a fortune on them.

I hope that helps.